[Copypasta] This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!

twitchquotes: ☑ “This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!” ☑ “My deck cannot hope to prevail against a deck of that caliber” ☑ "He REQUIRED those two cards in subsequent order to succeed" ☑ “He extracted from his deck the only cards capable of defeating me” ☑ "His cards defied logic" ☑ “There was no manoeuvre at my disposal to secure victory” ☑ “I played impeccably”
twitch chat
October 2014

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

I used to be a real ad
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James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

There is no need to be angry

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, "Truesilver Champion" is a common rarity card! This means that there are many chances during an arena draft to choose it compared to the rare, epic or legendary cards! It is not unreasonable for a Paladin deck to have 1 or more of "Truesilver Champion" so there is no need to be angry!
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp's lettuce points

twitchquotes: The year is 2035. Kripp's lettuce points have quickly developed into one of the most valuable crypto currencies in the world. Elsewhere, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, watching Kripp's stream, desperately trying to gamble for some lettuce points. He types "!bet 2 all" in chat, and anxiously awaits the results. Upon seeing Kripp go 0-3, Tanner puts a gun to his head and lets out one final "never lucky" before pulling the trigger.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Ben Brode and Firelands Portal

twitchquotes: Ben Brode here! We are happy to announce we have finally solved an issue that has plagued Hearthstone since beta. Despite our best efforts with cards like Flamecannon and Ethereal Conjurer, Mage was still able to lose games in Arena. With the Old Gods we introduced Faceless Summoner, and yet mage's average arena winrate was still only 75%. With the introduction of Firelands Portal, we hope to finally make Mage a viable arena class. 4Head
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Salt is not just a commodity, it is a way of life

twitchquotes: Hailing from the Morosan line from Romania, Octavian "Kripparian" Morosan has, instead of taking on the family business, opted to play a children's card game until three in the morning everyday. His pursuits to seperate himself from the mineral have only made the dynasty wealthier than it has ever been. On Octavian's stream, salt is not just a commodity, it is a way of life...
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

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