[Copypasta] Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021
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We are sending you to India to marry your beautiful cousin

twitchquotes: Hello Michael, this is your mother. I write here to inform you that your father and I do not approve of your timewaste playing childrens game for the internet. Therefor we are sending you to India to marry your beautiful cousin Venkatanarasimharajuvaripeta and work as a train conductor..
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

One chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all

twitchquotes: ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ I pledge allegiance to the chat of the United States of Kripparian, and to the Spammerino for which it stands, one chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

I encountered a racist homophobic dreamphobe today.

I joined a discord server yesterday. My discord status was: "💚 please give me your cum daddy dream! i want to fuck that smiley face of yours 😪😪😪". I am a dreamgender, and I support Dream and will continue to support him until I am out of cum. Anyways, back to the story. Now, this fucking stupid mod DMs (Dream Messages) me. What does he says? He says the following. "Your discord status is against our server rules, please remove or change your status. If you do not do this, we will have to ban/kick you." Then, I immediately told the moderator that I am a 13 dreamgender girl. He didn't give a shit. I thought ALL moderators could get seduced. That was a fucking lie. Ugh! Anyways, we started arguing about how my status is extremely SFW and wholesome (i am obviously right.) I told him that i anted to speak with the manager. So, he created a group chat with me, the owner, and himself. I explained him the situation, how the moderator was a racist pedophile dreamphobe homophobe and a groomer. The owner did NOT believe me; a fellow Dreamgender person. I was so mad that I punched my dream themed computer so hard. Then, I realized what i had done. I punched my daddy dream monitor. I immediately DMd dream about this on twitter. I wrote a 20000 word apology to him. I was so depressed after my daddy dream monitor was gone. Then, I logged to Discord on my dream themed phone. I could not believe what had happened. I got a DM from MEE6 saying that I got banned for the reason "inappropriate status". I was so mad. I immediately DM'd the owner about this. He didn't care, and he had the audacity to block a fellow DREAMGENDER person. I could not believe it. How could someone be this racist and dreamphobic? I cried myself to sleep that night and decided that I should go to therapy. Please tell me, r/dreamgender! What should I do about this? I already called the entire swat team on this discord moderator after he said that "Dream sucks", but it seemed like the swat did not care at all! Please, dream community. Let's get together and end this moderator's life! R/DREAMGENDER, ASSEMBLE! 💚🤍🖤💚🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤🤍
June 2021

Dreamgender

Discord

Imagine using a mid tier character

twitchquotes: Imagine using a mid tier character that needs tons of practice and dedication as you need to memorize every gimp and gimmick and you lose to some smash 4 downsmash down B up B shit
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

when the impostor is sus (v3)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⡀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠻⣿⡄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠁ 👁 ⠄⢹⣿⡗⠄ 👁 ⢄⡀⣾⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠘⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣰⣿⡿⠟⠃⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠿⢿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠿⢛⣿⣿⠿⠂⠄⢹⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡐⠐⠄⠄⣠⣀⣀⣚⣯⣵⣶⠆⣰⠄⠞⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠿⠿⠿⣻⡏⢠⣿⣎⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣛⣿⣿⣵⣿⡿⢹⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠿⠿⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠹⡇⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠿⠛⠋⠄⣸⣦⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing