[Copypasta] Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent. Am I the asshole?

>hanging out with friend group >one guy facetimes some british slag he knows >i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent >say she sounds like hermione >Make some joke about earl grey tea >she says, "ask this fuck'a how you even make earl grey tea >Say, "toss it in the boston harbor" >bongchick gets all pissed off >friend asks me to leave Am I the asshole?
June 2021

greentext

British People

xqcLook emote

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⡤⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠖⠉⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⢿⠇⠀⢰⣿⣿⣍⣀⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣄⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⡄⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠈⠉⠉⢁⣄⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣠⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⡄⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣡⣦⣶⣄⠀⠈⠉⠛⠛⠻⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡻⣻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⣀⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣷ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠉⠉⠛⢻⣿⡉⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⠿⠋ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣷⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀
April 2021
xQcOW

xqcTOS (emote)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁⠀⠘⠛⠛⠿⠿⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠉⢻⣿⣿⠛⠋⠀⠀⣿⡟⠛⠛⠻⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠿⠇⠀⠀ ⢠⣶⣦⡀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⠁⠀⢿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡆⠀⠸⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⡆⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣷⣤⣤⣴⣿⡇⠀⠀⢤⣤⣶⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠈⠉⠉⠉⢉⣩⣤⣄⣀⣀⣉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀ ⠘⣻⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠟⠃⠀ ⢿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀ ⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢛⣿⣄⠈⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2021
xQcOW

InvaderVie sub shaming

twitchquotes: It doesn't really matter how much money you make, or how much money you have 😄 That's really the thing because I'm not asking you large financial contribution! 20$ is quite alot of money. A sub is 5 dollars! It doesn't matter how broke you are 😄 If you have time to watch Twitch, you have 10$, if you don't, you should be working and earning money. Or you're saying you're so irresponsable with your money you won't support the entertainment you enjoy?! 😆
twitch chat
April 2020

Is today the day when I finally end it all?

twitchquotes: VoteYea VoteNay Is today the day when I should finally end it all? ⎝ FeelsGoodMan 🔫
twitch chat
August 2016
Text-to-Speech Playing