[Copypasta] Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021
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More Copypastas

Twitch Memer in his natural habitat

twitchquotes: Here we can observe the Twitch Memer in his natural habitat, stuck as usual in this intricate limbo of carefully crafted memes, emote spam and endless copypastas that no one even bothers to read anymore. The Memer actually used to be a very functional human being way back then. Will he ever claim that state back and finally manage to reproduce?
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

Twin Towers

ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–Œā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–‘ā–‘ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–Œā–„ā–„ā–Œā–‘ ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ ā–‘ā–’ā–’ā–’ā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ ā–‘ā–’ā–’ā–’ā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–ā–Œā–‘ā–ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–ā–Œā–‘ā–ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–‘ ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–„ā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–“ā–Œā–‘ā–ā–“ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–„ā–„ā–Œā–‘ ā–’ā–’ā–Œā–’ā–„ā–„ā–“ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–ā–“ā–Œā–„ā–ā–“ā–“ā–“ā–’ā–’ā–Œā–’ā–Œ ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–“ā–ˆā–“ā–’ā–ā–“ā–Œā–Œā–Œā–“ā–“ā–“ā–“ā–’ā–Œā–’ā–Œ ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–Œā–“ā–ˆā–ˆā–ā–’ā–Œā–ā–Œā–„ā–“ā–ˆā–ˆā–“ā–’ā–“ā–’ā–Œ ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–’ā–’ā–ā–ˆā–ˆā–“ā–ā–’ā–Œā–ā–Œā–ā–“ā–ˆā–ˆā–“ā–„ā–“ā–„ā–„ ā–“ā–“ā–Œā–ā–„ā–“ā–“ā–ˆā–“ā–ā–’ā–Œā–ā–ˆā–ˆā–€ā–“ā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆā–ˆ
April 2018

Ben Shapiro plays Among Us

Now let's say hypothetically I was the impostor. How would I get from reactor to medbay in that timespan, from which we saw each other, till you found yellow dead. Also if I were the impostor hypothetically speaking, how would I have finished all my tasks.
September 2020

Among Us / Amogus

Ben Shapiro

Catarrian hungry

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Catarrian here. Far too long have I meowed and you've ignored my plea for food. Here you are bragging to everybody about the militant "vegan" that you are, yet you neglect animals. It's time everybody knows the truth meow so we can report your sorry Romanian *** to PETA.ᕙ໒(˵ ̄ᓄ ̄˵)ą„­į•—
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

LUL haHAA ariW

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twitch chat
June 2016
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