[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

No more WalMart rollbacks for you

twitchquotes: Dear imaqtpie,My name is Nightblue3 and i hate you for trolling me out of challenger. This is your official warning - I have reported you to the security professionals at WalMart. You will be banned on site. No more rollbacks for you.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

DrDisRespect

⠄⠄⠈⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣠⣀⣀⡀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄ ⠄⡄⢴⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⢀⡈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠁⠄ ⢠⣿⡸⣿⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠴⠶⠯⣤⣤⣤⣤⠄⠄⠄⢀ ⠄⣿⣷⣽⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⠿⠿⠟⠉⠄⠄⢀⠎ ⠄⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣸⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢐⣶⡄⠄⢊⠄ ⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄ ⠄⠄⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⢀ ⡆⠄⠄⠛⢿⣿⡿⠟⠟⠛⠛⠃⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⡮⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣠⣾ ⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⡟⢁⣿⣿ ⣿⡄⠄⠄⠠⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠲⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⠁⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠈⢷⣶⣶⣷⣦⣼⣻⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣒⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⡯⡃⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2018
DrDisRespectLIVE

NEVER SUBBED NEVER DONATED

twitchquotes: NEVER SUBBED TriHard NEVER DONATED TriHard ADBLOCK ON TriHard STOLEN LAPTOP TriHard NEIGHBOURS WIFI TriHard MOMMAS HOUSE TriHard STOLEN SOLAR PANELS TriHard STOLEN SUN TriHard SOLAR ENERGY STOLEN TriHard WATER WHEEL TriHard NEIGHBOURS RIVER TriHard STOLEN HYDROELECTRIC PLANT TriHard CHARGING PHONE WITH WORK ELECTRICITY TriHard SHOWER IN BATHROOM SINK TriHard STOLEN FOOD FROM CAFETERIA TriHard STOLEN HAMSTER TriHard STOLEN HAMSTER WHEEL TriHard KINETIC ENERGY TriHard FREE ENTERTAINMENT TriHard
twitch chat
November 2019

It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. It's Seppuku or Harakiri.

twitchquotes: I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Nihongo (Japanese for you gaijin), and I’ve been involved in numerous study abroad trips to Japan, and I have memorized over 300 kanji characters. You need to learn that the correct term for ritual suicide is Seppuku or Harakiri. It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. Please educate yourselves.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Ape

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February 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing