[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Mods smell bad xD

⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣷⡾⠿⠿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⡄⠇⡄⣿⢰⣿⡷⢸⠄⣷⡎⢻⣄⣙⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⣷⣼⣧⣼⣦⣭⣴⣿⣦⣭⣴⣷⣤⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠛⠭⢭⣽⡿⠉⢿⠋⢹⣿⠠⠤⠤⡏⢹⣿⣿⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣟⠓⠖⢒⣸⠃⣴⠄⣼⡀⢿⠰⠶⠾⡇⠸⠟⢛⠄⠿⠛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠶⠂⣹⣿⡿⢋⡀⢿⣿⠄⣦⣬⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣀⣛⣃⣼⣏⣠⣶⣦⣈⣿⣀⠛⢛⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣍⠙⠟⢋⣨⣿⠄⣿⣷⣦⡈⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⢋⣡⣄⡉⢻⡏⠄⠿⠿⠟⢁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

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Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla

December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume. "Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows. We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
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I sexually Identify as your mom

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as your mom. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of cooking for your father and you and fuck your father and make you more sisters. People say to me that a person being your mom is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. im gonna marry your father. From now on I want you guys to call me " Mommy" and respect my right to cook food and fuck your father. If you can't accept me you're a mommyphobic and need to check if your mom is still alive. Thank you for being so understanding
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September 2019

I sexually Identify as

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twitchquotes: qtpDANCE on me qtpDANCE hes one hit qtpDANCE hes lit qtpDANCE hes no armor qtpDANCE im fucking running qtpDANCE im dead as fuck qtpDANCE im far as fuck from you guys qtpDANCE im gigalooted qtpDANCE give me a real gun game qtpDANCE oh my god qtpDANCE im so fucking bad qtpDANCE oh shit qtpDANCE im fucking trolling qtpDANCE if anyone has a skullpiercer qtpDANCE
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When Tides watches Reynad's stream

twitch chat
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TidesOfTime
Text-to-Speech Playing