Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas
LilZ
░░░░░░░░▄▄▀▀█▀▀▀▀▀▄▄░░░░░░░░
░░░░░░▄▀▓░░▒░░▒▒▒▒▒▒█▄░░░░░░
░░░░▄█▓▓▓░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▀▄░░░░
░░▄▀█▌▓▓▓░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▐▌▓▀▄░░
░█▓▓█▌▓▄▄▓░░░▒▒▒▒▄▄▒▒▒█▓▓▀▄░
▄▀▓▓█▌▓▀█▓░░░▒▒▒▒█▓▀▒▄▌▓▓▓▓█
█▓▓▓▄▀▓▓▓▓░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░▌▓▓▓█
▀▄▓▓█░▀▓▓░░░░░░░▒▒▒▒▒░▄▌▓▓█░
░█▓▓▓█░▓░░░░░░░░░▒▒▒░░█▓▓▓█░
░▀▄▓▓█░▐░░▄▄███▄░░░▐░░░▀▄▀░░
░░▀▄▄▀░▐░░█████▀░░▄▀░░░░░░░░
░░░░░░░░▀░░▀██▀░▄▀░░░░░░░░░░
Kripp and the Hardcore Police
twitchquotes:
༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ ༽ Kripp, this is the hardcore police, it has come to our attention that you RIP in peace above the allowed average hardcore limit. We are here to inform you that your channel prefix must be changed into cl (casual-life) as a repercussion to better represent your current lifestyle. This will be the last warning. ༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ ༽ ᴊ
twitch chat
Kripp
Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team
twitchquotes:
Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team contacting you due to your expertise in the game known as League of Legends. We wanted to invite you here, to riot studios, to singlehandedly write the code for the next big patch, rebalancing the game anyway you want! we know youre a much better player, coder, and balancer of games than we are. Thank YOU T1!!!
twitch chat
Tyler1
League of Legends
It’s Morbin time! FAQ (Reddit)
It’s Morbin time!
# FAQ
## What does this mean?
It’s time for Morbin.
## Why did I do this?
There are several reasons I may deem you morbin-able to be worthy of being morbed. These include, but are not limited to:
I am very Morby
I see you being morbin-able
You morbed me first
## Is Morbius THE movie of all time?
Yes
## I don't believe I deserved to be morbed upon. Can you un-morb me?
Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put morb-juice back into my morbenis. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me some thick morb-milk explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to fucking requests/comments within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of people gets morbed, and you are is likely no exception.
## How can I prevent this from happening in the future?
Accept the reality that I stick my Morbenis into your morbussy and move on. But learn from this mistake. You were a mistake because I forgot to wear a morbondom whilst fucking your morb-hole. I will continue to morb your morbussy until you improve your conduct.
Remember: morbing you who morbed me first is a right, not a privilege.
Gi-Hun Squid Game Stare
➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
➖⬛⬛⬛🏼🏼⬛⬛
➖⬛⬛⬛🏼🏼🏼⬛
➖⬛🏼🔳🏼🔳🏼⬛
➖➖🏼🏼🏼🏼🏼
➖➖🏼🏽🏽🏽🏼
➖⬜🟦🏼🏼🏼🟦⬜
⬜🟦🟦🟦🏽🟦🟦🟦⬜
🟦🟦🟦🟦⬜🟦🟦🟦🟦