[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Smoking Frog

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░█░▄██░░░░░░██▄░░ ░░░█▄▀▄▄░█░░░░█░▄░█▄ ░░▄▀░▀▀▀▀░░░░░░▀▀▀░░ ▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░▄░░░░░ █░░░░█░░░░░░▄▄▀░░░░░ █░▄▀▄░▀▀▀▀▀▀░░░▄▀▀▄░ ▀▄▀░░▀▀▄▄▄▄▄(_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅ () ด้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็้็็็็็ . ░▀▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
May 2017

Dear host EZ 🍷 of digital streams EZ 🍷

twitchquotes: Dear host EZ 🍷 of digital streams EZ 🍷 gentlemen from chat EZ 🍷 ask you to include male music EZ 🍷 with vocals EZ 🍷 of Gachirian era EZ 🍷
twitch chat
March 2020

KappaPride

SPAM THIS ANT

twitchquotes: SPAM 🐜 THIS 🐜 ANT 🐜 TO 🐜 SPAM 🐜 AN 🐜 ANT
twitch chat
May 2019

Rhyme Chant

EU calls NA

twitchquotes: 📞 4Head HELLO NA? 📞 4Head EU HERE 📞 4Head ARE YOU GOING TO GET OUT OF GROUPS THIS YEAR?? 📞 4Head
twitch chat
September 2020
LCS

League of Legends

EU vs NA

cant understand how you have a popular stream

twitchquotes: cant understand how you have a popular stream. you keep saying “i dont even know what im doing” and it shows. you’re strats... wait do you have any? doesn’t seem like it. you just seem consistantly terrible. dunno why people watch you. you’re not entertaining or educating or anything... just another garbage ARAM player... lost a potential watcher for... literally anyone else
twitch chat
September 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing