WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, it is a slippery slope! First yer jerkin it to a guy that looks a bit feminine, next thing you know? Yer in a pink miniskirt gettin ANALLY CREAMPIED and BUKKAKED by 4 cocks! I don’t even have 4 friends! And one of em thinks its a good idea to CUM IN YER HAIR does he KNOW how hard that shit is to get out? ITS FUCKIN HARD! I had to shower not ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT 4 FUCKING TIMES, AND COMB MY HAIR FOR AT LEAST AN HOUR! Oh yeah, and despite what porn told me, CUM TASTES TERRIBLE, its far to salty, and less sticky as it is SLIMY.
Yet again, NEVER jerk off to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, or you may end up like me.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Amogus 700 years in the future
Imagine, 700 years in the future, through some last vestige of the internet kept in an underground server, a notification miraculously appears on your device (which has been preserved in nuclear dust from the 5th world war). One night, an alien working a late shift at the museum of archeology notices the cracked screen suddenly light up, and upon it, one word arises from the battered code: Amogus. They do not know what this word means. They ponder it deeply. They scour the ancient tomes, desperate to understand its mystifying origin. It drives them mad. Is it a primeval cipher? The motto of a bygone civilization? A message from God? Night after night they study it by candlelight. They flip through pages in books so old, the slightest cough would turn the paper to a fine off-white powder. The answer is nowhere to be found. And then they are struck by a revelation: I was not meant to know this word. Its esoteric nature escapes my grasp for a reason. What if its meaning is too enlightening to bear? With this revelation comes anger. Spite. Despair. Why shouldn't I understand it?! What cosmic forces are there at play to keep me from such knowledge?! In a fit of desperate rage, they shatter your device against a wall and exclaim, arms raised to the heavens: "This is literally 1984!" Silence... Their pleas are unanswered. Sadly, in the end, their inability to unlock the word's meaning drives them to suicide. Its secrets are never known. So I ask you this: is it better to die having never understood the true mind-bending nature of Amogus, or to be driven mad by the little spaceman in his blood-red suit? If you knew enlightenment would render you incapable of living on this mortal earth without making daily references to a game of space mafia, would you accept it? With knowledge comes power, but also endless suffering. Choose wisely, and be wary when standing at the edge of that great abyss we call "the Truth," lest you fall too deep.
Among Us / Amogus
Let's snipe
twitchquotes:
"PARFAIT!", says the Chief of the French Police. "We now have ze best one! Come my friend, together we can stop ze terrorists! Welcome to our ZNIPER TEAM!!". A smile appears on HufferNudes face. "Let's snipe".
twitch chat
Kripp
Hey Balls, I'm trying to learn to play Darius
twitchquotes:
ＨＥＹ ＢＡＬＬＳ， Ｉ’Ｍ ＴＲＹＩＮＧ ＴＯ ＬＥＡＲＮ ＴＯ ＰＬＡＹ ＤＡＲＩＵＳ． Ｉ ＪＵＳＴ ＨＡＶＥ Ａ ＱＵＥＳＴＩＯＮ ＡＢＯＵＴ ＴＨＥ ＳＫＩＬＬ ＢＵＩＬＤ： ＳＨＯＵＬＤ Ｉ ＭＡＸ ＤＥＣＩＭＡＴＥ ＬＩＫＥ ＹＯＵ ＤＥＣＩＭＡＴＥＤ ＦＮＡＴＩＣ， ＣＲＩＰＰＬＩＮＧ ＳＴＲＩＫＥ ＬＩＫＥ ＹＯＵ ＣＲＩＰＰＬＥＤ ＦＮＡＴＩＣ＇Ｓ ＣＨＡＮＣＥＳ ＯＦ ＧＥＴＴＩＮＧ ＯＵＴ ＯＦ ＧＲＯＵＰＳ，ＯＲ ＡＰＰＲＥＨＥＮＤ ＬＩＫＥ ＹＯＵ ＡＰＰＲＥＨＥＮＤＥＤ ＡＬＬ ＦＩＶＥ ＯＦ ＦＮＡＴＩＣ ＦＯＲ Ａ ＰＥＮＴＡＫＩＬＬ．
twitch chat
Riot Games
League of Legends
Dex barks at Kripp
twitchquotes:
"Alright, bark at Kripp, I guess" "Haven't barked at Kripp in a while, let's go bark" "Barking at Kripp isn't that good, but alright"
"Alright, bark at Kripp, I guess" "Haven't barked at Kripp in a while, let's go bark" "Barking at Kripp isn't that good, but alright"
twitch chat
Kripp
notices you have a bulge
twitchquotes:
Rawr~nuzzles how are you daddy? pounces on you you’re so warm. owo? notices you have a bulge. someone’s happy! nuzzles your necky wecky~ murr~ hehehe. rubbies your bulgy wolgy you’re so big :oooo rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy it doesn’t stop growing uwu kisses you and lickies your neck. do you likie? im wagging my wittle baby tail all for your bulgy wolgy! come on daddy dont keep me waiting~
twitch chat