[Copypasta] WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAP PORN

WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, it is a slippery slope! First yer jerkin it to a guy that looks a bit feminine, next thing you know? Yer in a pink miniskirt gettin ANALLY CREAMPIED and BUKKAKED by 4 cocks! I donโ€™t even have 4 friends! And one of em thinks its a good idea to CUM IN YER HAIR does he KNOW how hard that shit is to get out? ITS FUCKIN HARD! I had to shower not ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT 4 FUCKING TIMES, AND COMB MY HAIR FOR AT LEAST AN HOUR! Oh yeah, and despite what porn told me, CUM TASTES TERRIBLE, its far to salty, and less sticky as it is SLIMY. Yet again, NEVER jerk off to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, or you may end up like me.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

SO MALD v2

โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€ โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
July 2019

Kripp at Blizzcon

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, not sure if you remember me. I sat 3 rows behind you at Blizzcon 2014. I know I will never be a front row pro like you, but I want to let you know that your big head ruined me and my boyfriends experience. I know $200 might not be a lot to you, but I didn't spend $200 to watch the back of your head absorb the front part of your hairline, so next time, scoot over, k?
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

After Reynad uses pictures of his forehead for Tinder...

twitchquotes: After Reynad began using only pictures of his forehead for his Tinder account, his amount of female attention increased drastically. One woman was particularly ready to hop in bed with him. "I'm going to make so much money off of this thirsty Ukrainian!" she said to herself. Unfortunately for her she left her phone on with Andrey's Tinder profile open and his forehead heard her. She "disappeared" within the week.
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

Think of the saltwater fish

twitchquotes: ( ยฐ อœส–อกยฐ) Hey Kripp, Marine Biologist Gilbin Pastarino here. I come to you on behald of all the salt water creatures of the world as your body seems to have absorbed 99% of the oceans salt. Please thinkerino of the poor fisheroni. Thanks
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

YOUโ€™VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE KAWAII TRUCK

YOUโ€™VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE |^^^^^^^^^^^^](๏พ‰โ—•ใƒฎโ—•)๏พ‰*:๏ฝฅ๏พŸโœง | KAWAII TRUCK | โ€˜|โ€โ€œโ€;.., ___. |_โ€ฆ_โ€ฆ______===|= _|__|โ€ฆ, ] | โ€(@ )โ€™(@ )โ€โ€œโ€โ€œ*|(@ )(@ )*****(@ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€โŠ‚๏ผˆ๏พŸะ”๏พŸโŠ‚โŒ’๏ผ‰ NO KAWAII TRUCK NO!!! MOTHERFUCKER ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT EIGHT FUCKING KAWAII ASS PEOPLE! IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOUโ€™LL KNOW YOU'RE REALLY SO FUCKING KAWAII IT'S SO FUCKING SUGOI PEOPLE WILL PISS THEIR PANTS AND SHIT BRICKS AND YOU WILL BE THE MOTHERFUCKING LORD OF THE MOTHERFUCKING KAWAII! IF YOU BREAK THIS MOTHERFUCKING CHAIN, YOU'LL BE CURSED WITH UNKAWAIINESS AND SHITTINESS FOR 9000 YEARS SO PASS IT; HIT WHO EVER YOU THINK IS KAWAII.
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

Text-to-Speech Playing