I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
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World War 2 in emojis
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ค๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณ๐ฉ๐ช
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ฆ๐ซ๐ท๐๐
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธโก๏ธ๐๐๐ฆ๐น
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ก๐ก๐๐๐จ๐ฟ๐จ
๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณ๐๐๐ซ๐ท๐จโ๐จ๐๐
๐จ๐ฟ๐ต๐ซ๐จ๐ป๐ฉ๐ช
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ค๐จ๐ป๐ท๐บ
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ก๐ก๐๐๐๐ต๐ฑ
๐ต๐ฑ๐คฌ๐คฌ๐คฌ๐คฌ๐
โโ๏ธ๐
โโ๏ธ
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ค๐ท๐บ๐จ๐ป๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธ๐ถโโ๏ธโโก๏ธโ๐ต๐ฑ๐ฏ
๐ซ๐ท๐จโ๐จ๐ฏ๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณ๐ฏ
๐ซ๐ท๐จโ๐จ๐ก๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณโโ๐๏ธโ๐จ๐ป๐ฉ๐ช
๐ต๐ฑ๐ต๐ซ๐จ๐ป๐ฉ๐ช๐ค๐จ๐ป๐ท๐บ
๐ซ๐ท๐ต๐ซ๐จ๐ป๐ฉ๐ช
๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณโ๐ข
๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณ๐๐โก๏ธ๐ณ๐ณโฟ๐บ๐ธ
๐ฏ๐ต๐๐ซ๐ซ๐ฃ๐ฃโก๏ธ๐บ๐ธโฟ๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ญ๐ญ
๐บ๐ธโฟ๐ก๐ก๐ฌ๐ง๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณโโ๐๏ธโ๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ฏ๐ต๐๐ฎ๐น๐จโ๐ฆฒ
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ปโ๐๏ธโ๐ท๐บ๐จ๐ป๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ก๐ก๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ
๐ท๐บ๐จ๐ป๐๐๐โก๏ธ๐บ๐ธ๐ณ๐ฌ๐ง๐ณ
๐ฉ๐ช๐จ๐ป๐ต๐ซ๐บ๐ธ๐๐ท๐บ๐๐จ๐ฆ๐๐ซ๐ท๐
๐ฏ๐ต๐ต๐ซ๐บ๐ธ๐โข๐ฃ
๐บ๐ณ
Emoji Pasta
Trolling My Dad's Office with Among Us (Office Series Part 6, Finale Part 3)
The other day, it was โtake your kid to work dayโ at my dadโs job. It was really epic and poggers because I got to skip school for it. As we were walking in, I couldnโt help but notice that the company logo roughly resembled a crewmate from the popular game, Among Us. I asked my father, โIs this the Among Us but real??โ My dad replied โNo, son, this is the Pepsico corporate office.โ
As we entered the building, my dad said โSon, I have a lot of work to do today. You can hang out with the other kids or play on your phone, just please stay on this floor.โ He then entered the elevator and left. I turned to the other kids (who were all playing on their phones) and said โDoes anyone wanna play some Among Us?โ However, no one else wanted to play. I was getting bored, so I decided to explore around a little bit. I walked into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor.As the elevator door opened, I saw what appeared to be a long hallway. As I was walking down it, I found a door that was labeled โExecutive Meeting Roomโ. The door was unlocked, so I walked in and there were about 15 people in suits and ties around a table. They all looked up at me in confusion. One of them asked me โHey buddy, are you lost?โ I noticed that his nametag read โHugh Johnson, CFOโ. โDoes CFO stand for Chungus Fortnite Officer?โ, I asked. โNo, it does not. And where is your parent? Go back to the bottom floor young man!โ He was yelling at me. So I said โYouโre sus. I should eject you, Hugh Johnson. Do you have aโฆ HUGE JOHNSON?! Thatโs funny like Big Chungus, which is the Bugs Bunny from Looney Tunes but a big rabbit!โ I laughed. Everyone was looking up at me in shock when I said โWanna play some Among Us guys?โ
The CEO, a very sexy woman, ooga booga awooga, said โYoung man, go back to the first floor now!โ But the sexy woman I just couldnโt listen to as I admired her. โNo, because you have big tits.โ Her jaw dropped, and she said, โYoung man, this is an important meeting. Get the fuck out!โ She then used the intercom to call security. Coming to the realization that I was running out of time, I pulled down my pants to show everyone my Among Us underwear. I jumped up onto the meeting table and started twerking (to make sure everyone saw my among us underwear I got for Christmas) and said โDo you like what you see?โ Everyone was yelling at me to get out as I was twerking. โIโm so hot~~~~โ I said. The yelling got louder. I ran out of the door and closed it, hoping that security wouldnโt find me. I quickly ran into the elevator and went down.
Trolling with Among Us
Among Us / Amogus
WutFace crazy arms
twitchquotes:
โฒโโงนโฒโโงน 
โงธโ โฑโงธโ โฑ
โงธโ โฑโงธโ โฑ
twitch chat
i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad
twitchquotes:
i think its hilarious u kids talking shit about reynad. u wouldnt say this shit to him at lan, hes jacked. not only that but he wears the freshest clothes, eats at the chillest restaurants and hangs out with the hottest dudes. yall are pathetic lol.
twitch chat
Reynad
Classic
I fucking hate gaming laptops
I fucking hate gaming laptops.
Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.