I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Kripp meets Gordon Ramsay
twitchquotes:
Kripp meets Gordan Ramsay behind the kitchen, gently caressing his body, he mutters "hey say that word again, and say it like you mean it" "ORE-GAHHHNO" Ramsey softly whispers into kripps ear, as he gets chills throughout his body "oh you know i love it when you say that, now give me my daily dose of OMEEGA 3" as Ramsey inserts his sausage into kripps prepared packag
twitch chat
Kripp
The Cocklock Deck
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp, its the "cocklock" you just beat. I'm on the phone with my mom right now, and she isn't very happy with you. She is coming over now to comfort me, and then we are going to have to report you to the police. I hope you enjoy jail.
twitch chat
Kripp
MingLee
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I'm going to kill that prosterino
twitchquotes:
The Prostitute asks the Kripp, "Why don't you make a D3 video?" Kripp flies into a rage and hits her with an ornate salt shaker yelling, "I'm going to kill that prosterino!" When the cops finally caught him, after the 2 hour shootout, Kripp lies bleeding on the ground and mutters weakly to the sky..."I played that perfectly, nothing I coulda done cough what a joke.."
twitch chat
Kripp
BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!”
twitchquotes:
BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
Kripp