[Copypasta] How do I properly get rid of a life size sex doll?

I bought a $1000+ sex doll which weighs almost 100 pounds and has a metal skeleton and silicone outside. It's like 5'3 and looks very realistic. I bought it when I was drunk like 2 years ago and didn't cancel the order the next day as I forgot I even ordered it; it showed up on my doorstep like 10 days later in a huge box... I tried to use it once but it is impossible to use because its so cold lol. I have it buried under clothes that I don't wear anymore in my walk-in closet for almost 2 years and every time I have a girl over I have to keep the closet locked and I even have to tell my cleaner to clean all rooms aside from my walk-in closet as I am embarrassed by it. I NEVER litter but I don't know what to do with it. I really want to put it in the back of my truck and dump it in the woods somewhere but I know that is a shit thing to do and will not do it. How can I dispose of it in a environmentally safe way without driving to a dump and looking like I am disposing of a dead body or having the workers laugh at me? I can't cut it up into pieces and put it into trash bags as the skeleton is metal and I just don't have the tools to do it; its a really legit sex doll it is super high quality. My apartment complex has a huge dumpster but its all on camera; should I just go there super late at night and throw it in there? The dumpster is on camera and its for "trash only" it says no metal and no boxes. Anyone have an answer on how to dispose of this thing by myself, quietly and without anyone seeing me? Thanks !! EDIT: Lots of weirdos getting angry at me because I "fabricated this" story/question. She just got a (SFW) photo shoot for you so shut up. https://ibb.co/album/xKkCs1
July 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Rank 11 can be tough

twitchquotes: ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʀᴀɴᴋ 11 ᴄᴀɴ ʙᴇ ᴛᴏᴜɢʜ, sᴛᴀʏ sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ʙʀᴏ. Yᴏᴜʀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ʙᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɢᴜʏs ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʀᴇ sᴏ ʟᴜᴄᴋʏ! Sᴏᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ɢᴏ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ᴀʀᴇɴᴀ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟs ᴄᴀɴ ᴡɪɴ ɢᴀᴍᴇs. Aʜʜ ʏᴇs... ᴀʀᴇɴᴀ, ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴄᴏɴsᴛʀᴜᴄᴛɪɴɢ ᴀ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴏɪᴄᴇ ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ᴀɴ ɪssᴜᴇ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

How to win any Internet argument

May 2021

DUST TEST IF YOU TOUCH THE BUTTON

twitchquotes: DUST TEST 🔴 IF YOU TOUCH THE BUTTON , GO TO PRESS THE BUTTON ⎝ monkaS
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Chat Test

Stream snipers

twitchquotes: One day, the Papa asks Kripp to go fishing, Kripp shrugs, “Alright, but catch and release only – I’m vegan.” They arrive at the local pristine clear waters of an Ontario stream brimming with wild trout and prepare to fish. Suddenly Kripp shouts, “Get down!”. A crack sounds through the air, and the Papa sees Kripp on the ground bleeding. His final words are, “Fucking stream snipers.”
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Don't even try to compare Xqc to Forsen

twitchquotes: Don't even try to compare Xqcow to frozen. Xqcow is god, frozen is dog. Xqcow is smart, frozen is a wet shart. Xqcow makes Poggers plays, frozen is a glorified sleep aid. Xqcow is the juicer, frozen is a fruit. Capiche kiddo?
twitch chat
January 2022
Forsen
Text-to-Speech Playing