[Copypasta] How do I properly get rid of a life size sex doll?

I bought a $1000+ sex doll which weighs almost 100 pounds and has a metal skeleton and silicone outside. It's like 5'3 and looks very realistic. I bought it when I was drunk like 2 years ago and didn't cancel the order the next day as I forgot I even ordered it; it showed up on my doorstep like 10 days later in a huge box... I tried to use it once but it is impossible to use because its so cold lol. I have it buried under clothes that I don't wear anymore in my walk-in closet for almost 2 years and every time I have a girl over I have to keep the closet locked and I even have to tell my cleaner to clean all rooms aside from my walk-in closet as I am embarrassed by it. I NEVER litter but I don't know what to do with it. I really want to put it in the back of my truck and dump it in the woods somewhere but I know that is a shit thing to do and will not do it. How can I dispose of it in a environmentally safe way without driving to a dump and looking like I am disposing of a dead body or having the workers laugh at me? I can't cut it up into pieces and put it into trash bags as the skeleton is metal and I just don't have the tools to do it; its a really legit sex doll it is super high quality. My apartment complex has a huge dumpster but its all on camera; should I just go there super late at night and throw it in there? The dumpster is on camera and its for "trash only" it says no metal and no boxes. Anyone have an answer on how to dispose of this thing by myself, quietly and without anyone seeing me? Thanks !! EDIT: Lots of weirdos getting angry at me because I "fabricated this" story/question. She just got a (SFW) photo shoot for you so shut up. https://ibb.co/album/xKkCs1
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius

twitchquotes: My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius, commander of the PJSalteers of the North, General of the Salty Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Saltarrian. Father to a Flamestriked son, husband to a Top decked wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this stream or the next.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Twitch chat isn’t that dumb

twitchquotes: Twitch chat isn’t that dumb. They don’t just copy paste anything. Believe it or not, most people in chat have functioning brains. Watch, no one in chat will repost this message.
twitch chat
April 2019

3% off of everything except my forehead

twitchquotes: Reynad ran crying out of the house. Knowing something was wrong, Frodan ran out after him. "What's wrong?" Frodan asked Reynad. Reynad replied with tears in his eyes, "Everyone was making fun of me." "Why?" Frodan said. Reynad barely eked out the words, "I can use promo code TEMPO to get 3% off of everything, except my forehead."
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

Yeah I'm a virgin, so what?

Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
September 2021

i’ll have you know that i make over 6 figures

twitchquotes: sorry bud, i don’t have time to be in a little fictional world like you do. i’ll have you know that i make over 6 figures a year and live in a house with 4 bathrooms....and that’s not even including my investments....
twitch chat
April 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing