Hi i got suspended from reddit for the "what are you fucking gay" comment and just wanted to say that it was a joke and i thought that it could obviously be seen as one but i guess it wasnt. So yeah im not homophobic, just extremely racist, sorry if i made you feel bad, all my homies are allies of the lgbtq community. idek if you reported it maybe you got the joke but better safe than sorry and all that
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I hate it when people type "xD"
twitchquotes:
I hate it when people type "xD" 
twitch chat
Lying about service dogs
I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
‘Is it a service dog?’
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
So you start reading a copy pasta...
twitchquotes:
So you start reading a copy pasta... wondering when it will get good. It's a large wall of text, there must be something of substance somewhere in here, right? You scroll up to stop the chat elevator so you can finish reading it. But then you realize... It's just a waste of your time. It's just a large wall of text that is completely useless. It's a waste of everyone's time... Regardless, you highlight the text, Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V and hit Enter...
twitch chat
Kapp
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Amaz and Kripp
twitchquotes:
Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. “Pepperoni” Kripp whispered into Amaz’s elvish ear, as they started making out. “Do…do I win?” Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. “Your deck is crazy” Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. “It’s lethal guys” Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
twitch chat
Kripp