I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
‘Is it a service dog?’
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
What happened to this ad? :(
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GabeN says James is an ass
God I want Winston's fat hairy ass on me right now
twitchquotes:
God I want Winston's fat hairy ass on me right now. 
I want his scientist ape body all over me every day, it brings me to orgasmic relief that he could yell "OH YEAH" or "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" to me at anytime. moon2GASM If Activision Blizzard made Winston sexdolls I would buy them all for myself and never leave my mom's basement. Winston is so fucking smart, I want him to teach me science and I'll teach him about fetishes. Fuck I just want Winston to be real. 🔫
I want his scientist ape body all over me every day, it brings me to orgasmic relief that he could yell "OH YEAH" or "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" to me at anytime. moon2GASM If Activision Blizzard made Winston sexdolls I would buy them all for myself and never leave my mom's basement. Winston is so fucking smart, I want him to teach me science and I'll teach him about fetishes. Fuck I just want Winston to be real. 🔫
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Overwatch
Getting meme'd
twitchquotes:
Kripp my friend bought your Stupid Lizard shirt and he told me he got meme'd! I can't believe you'd go out in the world and do that? Meme someone. I'll have you know my best dog was meme'd back in 'Nam. It ruined him. RIP dog
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Kripp
I was born with glass bones and paper skin
twitchquotes:
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
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GREAT AD OF THE SKY PLEASE HEAR MY CRY
twitchquotes:
GREAT AD OF THE SKY PLEASE HEAR MY CRY. TRANSFORM THYSELF FROM AD OF LIGHT AND BRING ME VICTORY IN THIS FIGHT. ENVELOP THE DESERT WITH YOUR GLOW AND CAST YOUR AD UPON MY FOE. UNLOCK YOUR ADS FROM DEEP WITHIN SO THAT TOGETHER WE MAY WIN!!
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