I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
‘Is it a service dog?’
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Jam a man of fortune xQc
I hate April Fool's Day
I’m fucking shaking and crying right now y’all, and people aren’t taking me seriously. This is a DUMB FUCKING HOLIDAY, where people say shit that ISN’T FUCKING REAL for NO REASON. I’ve cut off 8 family members already for falling for this shriveled up, half-assed ANNUAL CORPORATE FIG LEAF like the NPC SHEEP THEY ARE. Maybe if they listened to REAL COMEDY like Bill Maher or political satire that validates what I already believe in, they’d be WORTHY OF INTERACTING WITH. BUT NO, I have to scroll through my timeline, seething, wailing and gnashing my teeth as I’m BOMBARDED BY LOW EFFORT CORNY CAPITALIST PROPOGANDA. THIS IS A SERIOUS DAY. I’m allowed to be this pressed about ha-ha corny joke day because IT’S SERIOUS FOR ME AND THEREFORE SHOULD BE FOR EVERYONE. My great uncle was tragically flattened while trying to rob a coca-cola vending machine on this date, and PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING CORNU FUKUNG JOKES. I’ve had enough
When I see FeelsBadMan in chat I actually feel bad
twitchquotes:
When I see 
in chat I actually feel bad.
in chat I actually feel bad.
twitch chat
DO A BACKFLIP
97%, of teenagers would cry if they saw Justin Bieber standing on top of a building about to jump. "If you are the 3% sitting there with popcorn, screaming "DO A BACKFLIP," Repost this.
Can you stack these cans
twitchquotes:
hey matey can you stack this can jus likeme 
try like me! try like me! heres another can. : ) try like me to stack this cans can you can you ?? stack 4 or 5 whether you ask me or not. 
for ME
hey matey can you stack this can jus likeme try like me! try like me! heres another can. : ) try like me to stack this cans can you can you ?? stack 4 or 5 whether you ask me or not. for ME
twitch chat