[Copypasta] Lying about service dogs

I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask; ‘Is it a service dog?’ With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to. If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink Always works. I love dogs
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Rooster

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▄▀▀▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░▄▀▒▒▒▒▀▄░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░▀▌▒▒▐▀░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░▄███▀░◐░░░▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░▐▀▌░░░░░▐░░░░░░░░░░▄▀▀▀▄▄ ░░▐░░▐░░░░░▐░░░░░░░░░█░▄█▀ ░░▐▄▄▌░░░░░▐▄▄░░░░░░█░░▄▄▀▀▀▀▄ ░░░░░░▌░░░░▄▀▒▒▀▀▀▀▄▀░▄▀░▄▄▄▀▀ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▄░░▀▄▄▄░▄ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄░▄▄▀▀ ░░░░░▀▄░░░░▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄ ░░░░░░░▀▄▄░░░█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▄ ░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▀░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░▌▌░▌▌░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░▄▄▌▌▄▌▌
February 2017

Does anyone else bite their Switch?

twitchquotes: Does anyone else bite their Switch? This is not a shitpost, I really do this. I don't like to rage when I'm playing online, so when something really annoying happens and I get pissed, I try not to yell or punch something. Instead, I keep a straight face and I angrily bite into my switch for a few seconds until my anger is released. The best part of this is that Nintendo seems to have built the Switch with this in mind, because the plastic material seems completely resistant to my teeth. Legit, there are never teeth marks even mere minutes after the initial chomp. What I'm wondering is, does anyone else here do the same? Am I the only munching smash player? I hope I've inspired someone to try the same, it's a super good way to take your anger out without damaging anything or making noise!
twitch chat
July 2020

Kripp's bike accident

twitchquotes: Toronto authorities reported that Octavian "kripp" Morosan passed away last night in the Toronto east general Hospital after a bike accident near his home
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Hi Kripp, this is Hungrybox's mom

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Hungrybox's mom. I noticed you are in need of a "comeback" you keep screaming about how "unlucky: and how "unfair" your little game is. Maybe Your moves are a little off because you are hungry. I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if you ate some CAMPBELL'S CHUNKY SOUP. Its made with your favorite ingredient: Salt.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

twitchquotes: 4Head No girlfriend 4Head No friends 4Head No talents 4Head Saturday night alone 4Head Wasting time on Twitch 4Head Watching a dead game 4Head Reading the chat more than the stream 4Head Spamming pastas brainlessly 4Head Must be me
twitch chat
September 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing