So yesterday in class we were all given our new Windows computers (last year, I hacked the chromebooks so they could play Sonic Advance) and I immediately downloaded twenty-five PC Sonic games within one hour and installed two dozen emulators to play the console and handheld ones. After we all got our computers, I bragged about having the ability to play 60 Sonic games. The teacher confisticated my computer and said I would have to use the chromebooks for the rest of the year. She also said that Sonic was a dead franchise and that Fortnite was better in every way. That was really no good and SLOW of her! So I ripped my computer out of my Sonic-hating teacher and screamed "YOU SLUTTY SLOW SONIC HATER! YOU'RE JUST TOO SLOW!" I also went to her macbook, and deleted Fortnite and installed more Sonic games and played Gotta Go Fast to the whole class. She gave me an F, which is impossible since E is the lowest rank and S is the highest, and sent me to the principal's office, where I was suspended and they called my parents, who took away my Game Gear. When I get back, I'll make sure they pay for being TOO SLOW.
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas
Urgot demands playtime!
twitchquotes:
Dear Mr Rodriguez Qtpie. This is Urgot, the best ranged champion since Thresh ADC. I must confess that I find your consistant playing of other ADCs whilst neglecting me racist. Urgot demands playtime!! 
twitch chat
imaqtpie
k3soju bt diff kiyoon fanfic
twitchquotes:
Soju and kiyoon lying on their deathbed talking about good old set 5. Soju: Remember how broken BT was hehe. Kiyoon: Yeah haha. The nurse comes in with Sojus daily blood transfusion (BT), what she didnt know is tha kiyoon had paid off the nurse to give him the wrong blood. Soju: Kiyoon im dying, i got downgraded so hard. IK soju, ik... goodbye old friend. Fucking BT diff soju whispers with his last breath...
twitch chat
k3soju
Teamfight Tactics
How can these trash players be considered pros
twitchquotes:
How can these trash players be considered pros when they are always falling off the map?? Even I in Silver can at least not just walk of the map lol...
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague
Overwatch
Slap Chop commercial script
Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! Youâre going to be in a great mood all day, because youâre going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look hereâs a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you donât have to switch any blades.
Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- thatâs why you donât have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza.
Youâre going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now youâre going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this youâre going to have an exciting life now.
Look hereâs a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and youâre going to love this. You donât have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go.
Youâre going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isnât that beautiful on your ice cream.
I hope you enjoy being tucked
twitchquotes:
The year was 1999. A much younger trump was getting ready for bed when his mother entered the room. "Sweetums, it's much past your bedtime!" she chides. Obediently, Trump climbs into bed. As his mother lovingly lays the covers over him, she whispers "I hope you enjoy being tucked."
twitch chat
Trump