So yesterday in class we were all given our new Windows computers (last year, I hacked the chromebooks so they could play Sonic Advance) and I immediately downloaded twenty-five PC Sonic games within one hour and installed two dozen emulators to play the console and handheld ones. After we all got our computers, I bragged about having the ability to play 60 Sonic games. The teacher confisticated my computer and said I would have to use the chromebooks for the rest of the year. She also said that Sonic was a dead franchise and that Fortnite was better in every way. That was really no good and SLOW of her! So I ripped my computer out of my Sonic-hating teacher and screamed "YOU SLUTTY SLOW SONIC HATER! YOU'RE JUST TOO SLOW!" I also went to her macbook, and deleted Fortnite and installed more Sonic games and played Gotta Go Fast to the whole class. She gave me an F, which is impossible since E is the lowest rank and S is the highest, and sent me to the principal's office, where I was suspended and they called my parents, who took away my Game Gear. When I get back, I'll make sure they pay for being TOO SLOW.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...
It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
Classic
A chef explaining why air fryers are a scam on r/unpopularopinion
As a chef, it’s an insult to hear “air fryers are as good as frying”. Air fryers are fucking bullshit scams and are just convection ovens with an extra fan added.
Seriously, pan searing or regular baking will always be better. I swear to shit Jared if I hear you compare fried chicken to air fried chicken one more time I’m gonna smack the gob out of you.
Edit: I’m in danger, I never realized how deep the air fryer fandom goes. I will die on this hill
Edit2: I’ll never stop upvoting and loving you all but… but I’m just gonna go cry about something totally different..
Edit3: i think id be a lot less upset if it was called an “extra air oven” as its a convection oven with extra fans.
Edit4: if I had a dollar for every comment “you clearly don’t own an air fryer” I’d be able to put it towards a new toaster oven.
Edit5: the chances of getting doxxed over kitchen appliances isn’t high.. but never zero.
Edit6: apparently air fryers are taking my job? Sorry boys and girls, no more foi gras for the rich.
Can a nigga borrow a fry?
He says it every morning. He calls me nigga, he calls the other kids nigga, he calls himself nigga. All the time. Nigga this, nigga that, nigga PLEASE. Bitch nigga. Nigga have you lost your mind? Nigga check that ho. Nigga, you bullshittin. Break yourself, nigga. He says it so much I don't even notice it anymore. Last week in lunch Riley says to a classmate, "Can a nigga borrow a French fry?" My first thought wasn't "Oh my God he said the word, t-the n-word!" It was "How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?, nigga, is you gonna give it back?"
Muscular lenny
Hey Krip, it's your hairdresser here, Snipparrian
twitchquotes:
Hey Krip, it's your hairdresser here, Snipparrian, I just wanted you to know I'm greatful for the tip you gave me after I shaved your pubic hair into a Swastika, now your mods visit me on a daily basis too keep up the facist chat regime. Copy and pasta so Kripp knows of my thanks ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ﾉ
twitch chat
Kripp