[Copypasta] Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Germany scores on Brazil

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Every 60 seconds in Brazil, Germany scores a goal. Together we can stop this. Please spread the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

Equal rights equal fights

I (15M) was walking from school to home today and a girl (15F) kicked my leg. So yeah I was walking to home today and that bitchass girl kicked my leg. It didn't hurt too much it was more like a fly landing on me as my super muscly body protected me. But anyway, as a person that believes in gender equality I punched her a lot harder with my super muscly manly man fists and knocked her out, kidnapped her to my school's chemistry lab at night, then with my super smart brain I composed HCl (hydrochloric acid for those uneducated inferior peeps) with my super chemistry knowledge. I then dipped her in my glorious acid just like any gender equality believing sigma male would. Equal rights equal fights my dear superior reddit using sigma male friends.
May 2022

If two virgins fuck...

If two virgins fuck and take each other's virginity, shouldn't they still have one each? Because, think about it... The definition of take is to capture and receive something, like, if little Bob got 10 dollars and I rudely took it from him, he'd most likely cry, but I'd also gain 10 dollars since I took 10 dollars from him, no? Shouldn't it be the same with virginity, but hopefully, just without the crying? You take a virginty and lose one in the process, so it should be plus-minus zero, I should still have one virginty left? So if I only fuck virgins, will I be a virgin forever? And can I have multiple virginities if I take from other virgins?
September 2021

Fungus wojak / Shroomjak / Shrigma male

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⡃⠀⠿⠇⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠁⠀⣰⡄⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠸⡷⠃⢀⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠋⢀⣀⡀⠀⢿⣳⡄⢳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠞⠁⠀⠸⣌⣻⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⢾⢁⡞⠉⠉⠓⢦⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡴⠯⠴⠋⠈⠧⣄⣀⣀⣠⠇⠀⠀⠶⠆⠀⢲⡆⠀⠀⠨⠷⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣅⢀⣠⠤⠶⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⣟⠛⠛⠛⠒⡒⠒⠒⠷⠦⢤⣀⠀⠀⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⢡⢟⣉⣀⠒⠶⠤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠈⠑⣆⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⠀⢈⣉⣉⣉⣛⣒⣿⣿⣶⣤⠼⠗⠶⠾⣅⣀⡤⠞⣁⣤⠴⠂⠘⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠈⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣭⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢶⣋⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣶⣶⣿⣭⣥⡏⢀⣈⣈⠉⠀⠀⠐⠂⠠⠈⣏⣉⣉⣻⣶⣞⡵⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢹⠃⠻⢿⣿⠟⠀⠘⢾⣿⣿⠀⡿⠛⠛⠓⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠉⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⣴⠀⠀⣹⡄⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠁⠉⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠄⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀
July 2021

Sonic and Tails

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣩⣛⠿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣾⣯⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⡋⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠏⠀⠀⠈⠻⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣯⡹⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣷⣦⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣇⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣦⡆⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣧⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠘⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠁⠀⠀⠋⠉⠉⢻⣿⡿⠿⠃⠀⠰ ⣿⡟⠉⠈⣿⣿⡏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⢴⣦⣴⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡁⠀⢰⣿⣿⡇⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣏⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠞⠁⣀⣾⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡇⠀⠘⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡀⠀⠀⣿⠃⠀⢸⠏⠙⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠠⠄⣀⣈⠛⣃⣴⣏⡙⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣄⣿⣿⣿⣇⠘⠁⠀⢰⣿⠖⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣄⠀⠀⢀⣤ ⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣯⡍⠁⠉⠂⠀⠀⠉⠉⠲⠚⣁⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠟⠋⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡂⢹⣿⡶⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣯⠀⠀⢀⠀⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣌⣛⣡⣴⡂⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠙⠧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⣷⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠀⠱⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
April 2021
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