[Copypasta] Every time I see Tifa punch someone I get a little sadder

twitchquotes: Every time I see Tifa punch someone I get a little sadder, because tha tis one less punch that could have been directed at my nutsack. I pray at night for Tifa to break into my house and mercilessly beat the everloving fuck out of my balls. I will pray extra hard tonight.
twitch chat
April 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Worst Matchup

twitchquotes: Worst Matchup: Warrior โœ“ Shaman โœ“ Priest โœ“ Rogue โœ“ Druid โœ“ Warlock โœ“ Hunter โœ“ Mage โœ“ Paladin โœ“
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

jerma got so angry at the one guy in chat

One day jerma got so angry at the one guy in chat who was being mean and spamming residentsleeper, he quite literally stuck his hands into his screen and yanked really hard. Out came this 5'9 brown haired highschooler who instantly began begging for his life. However, jerma growled really loud and started chanting the lyrics to "I'm a Walrus" by the beatles. The mods, the chat, no one could stop what happened next. Chat was spamming PauseChamp. Then Jerma just grabbed the poor highschooler by his neck and lifted him off the floor and began to spin him really fast.. His guts came flying out with the sheer force that jerma used to spin him. The camera was stained with blood and chat was all spamming monkaW and "LULW typical One guy moment". After a couple of moments jerma wiped the red marking from the camera and sat back down as if nothing happened. The weirdest part was that he started talking about soy milk and how he wasn't a sponsor with any soy milk company. He seemed quite annoyed that he wasnt a sponsor but continued to elaborate on how much he loved soy milk, but only that one specific brand of soy milk. I'm telling you, the one guy residentsleeper spammers are annoying as hell. EDIT: Unfortunately that segment of the VOD was deleted due to DMCA issues with Jerma singing The Beatles.
July 2022
Jerma985

This is why eSports will never...

twitchquotes: This is why eSports will never hit the general public as hard as for instance soccer. the way you kids are spamming this chat is just ruining the whole experience for a grown man. Seriously. Grow up.
twitch chat
August 2018

Classic

I, as a heterosexual man

twitchquotes: I, as a heterosexual man, would never feel attraction to another man. Not even a slim, supple young lad with hyper feminine features in the most endearing cat outfit you could possibly imagine. That doesn't seem attractive to me at all. If you find pictures of men like this, you can just send them to me so I know what to watch out for and avoid.
twitch chat
November 2020

Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK

twitchquotes: โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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Text-to-Speech Playing