[Copypasta] Called my overweight female friend a heckin chonker today and now she won’t talk to me

My female friend was crying about how fat she was and I was trying to comfort her by telling her that she didn’t look that fat but she kept accusing me of lying to make her feel bad so I thought that saying “maybe your just a heckin chonker” would cheer her up and lighten the mood but she just looked at me and left. I hope she realised that I was only being nice and that she is being irrational.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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People Who Fake Disorders Be Like

Red is the color of blood and that’s offensive and scary. Please refrain from using or ever mentioning the color red, as that is a trigger for me. A trigger of what you ask? One of my 20 disorders. ADHD, DID, Tourettes, OCD, anxiety, BPD, depression, OSDD, PTSD, Obesity, CPTSD, schizophrenia, psychosis, anorexia, and many many more. Prove it? Oh, let me switch real fast tics and throws phone across room OwO h-h-hello… this is Dream 🎾 (he/they) (5 years old) (trauma holder) uwu. You were just speaking to Zay🔥 (they/them) (22 years old) (Leader of the system) OwO do you be-be-believe me now? Sorry for the stutter, I was born with it 🤪😘🥸😘🥸 *switches back to Zay🔥 (They/them) (22 years old) (leader of the system) I told you 😎 but you didn’t believe me. Just wait to be canceled by all the Twitter users. Twitter, do your thing 😜
September 2021

Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Tavern Brawl. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

I was BANNED from my local super smash bros melee scene

twitchquotes: I was BANNED from my local super smash bros melee scene. They use the local community college to host this and TOLD ME BY EMAIL IF I CAME THERE THEY WOULD NOT ALLOW ME IN. This was out of nowhere so I immediately called the TO, who told me why. He said it was because I was frequently toxic and angry. He said that I yell at players and make them uncomfortable and scared, and that a girl quit because of me. While I DO sometimes get frustrated and vocalize it, so do many other people I am simply being discriminated against my voice is naturally deeper than most. also the truth is a girl never quit that is a complete lie, she was just butthurt that she was worst than everyone there. I'm so fucking irate. I've been a member of this community FOR YEARS and just now I'm a nuisance? I am entitled to a certain level of RESPECT for being a veteran player. I'm looking into finding a lawyer who get me unbanned. There MUST be a law that prevents people from arbitrarily banning others from certain locations without written documents proving it (the TO just SAID I was banned he did not provide any evidence.) The TO isn't rich or anything so I don't think I would have to ask a lot from him, I think he'd break under just pressure of lawsuit.
twitch chat
January 2019

Super Smash Bros

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

Negatron Cloak

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⠞⠛⢶⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡶⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⣰⠇⣈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⡗⢿⣶⣶⣤⣴⣾⠟⢠⡏⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⠇⢶⣤⣀⡺⠿⠋⣠⡾⠄⠄⢤⣶⣤⣄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣷⡄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣣⣿⣷⣌⡛⢿⣿⣾⡟⠁⢤⣤⣀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠙⢿⣷⠄ ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⢭⣶⣇⠄⠻⣿⣧⡀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠙⠇ ⢰⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣻⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠹⣿⣿⣄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣴⡄⠄ ⢸⡿⣱⣿⣿⣏⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣦⠄⠈⢿⡿⣱⣿ ⠘⣵⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⢾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⡜⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠁⣿⡿ ⢸⣶⣍⢿⢧⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠘⡜⣿⣷⣴⣦⣀⠘⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⢇⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠘⡽⡟⢫⣴⣶⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠙⢷⣿⡭⠡⠆⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⠄⢫⠄⣀⡹⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠃⠄⢀⣚⣭⣭⣭⡍⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣛⣂⠄⣼⡿⣣⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣁⣀⣈⣩⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣭⡶⠋⠄⠄⠄
January 2021

League of Legends

Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing