[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Don't use the "F word" on the trade floor

Just heard an employee use the “F word” on the trade floor, and immediately fired them. Maybe other funds will tolerate that kind of language, but don’t you dare talk about Fundamentals here.
January 2021

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Fortnite default dance 7

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀ ⠀⠀⣶⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⣤⣤ ⠀⣶⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⠿⣤⣀ ⣶⣿⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣀⣤⣶⣭⣿⣶⣀ ⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⠿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⠛⠿⣿⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠛⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⠀⠀⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

My average IQ after taking IQ tests...

twitchquotes: My average IQ after taking IQ tests from accredited psychologist is 134.5 ←Only 2% of the human population score that high. I'm very close to genius level IQ. You calling me stupid is like some one calling Albert Einstein stupid. Which makes one of us look stupid. Hint: Not me.
twitch chat
August 2019

AYAYAWeird

⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⡟⠋⠄⠄⠄⣀⡿⠄⠊⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠇⠄⢀⠃⠙⣿⣿ ⣤⠒⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⠄⢀⠊⠄⠄⠈⢿ ⣿⣠⠤⠴⠶⠒⠶⠶⠤⠤⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠃⠄⠂⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢎⠐⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠎⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⡧⠶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠲⠦⣭⡃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠶⠄ ⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢀ ⡇⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢊ ⢠⠄⠈⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⡦⠁⠄⠄⣼ ⢸⠄⠈⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿ ⢸⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠉⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⢿⣷⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2019

Weebs

This is so small to read even for you bro

twitchquotes: ᵀʰᶦˢ ᶦˢ ˢᵒ ˢᵐᵃᶫᶫ ᵗᵒ ʳᵉᵃᵈ ᵉᵛᵉᶰ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵒᵘ ᵇʳᵒ⋅ ᴰᵒᶰᵗ ᵗʳʸ ᵗᵒ ᶜᵒᶰᵗᶦᶰᵘᵉ ʳᵉᵃᵈᶦᶰᵍ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵇᵉᶜᵃᵘˢᵉ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵉʸᵉˢ ʷᶦᶫᶫ ˢᵗᵃʳᵗ ᵗᵒ ʰᵘʳᵗ ˢᵒᵒᶰ ᶦᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵈᵒᶰᵗ ˢᵗᵒᵖ⋅ ᵂʰʸ ᵈᵒᶰᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵗᵒᵖ﹖⋅⋅⋅⋅ᵍᵒ ᵃʷᵃʸ ᵇʳᵒ ᵃᶰᵈ ʳᵉᵃᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᶰᵉˣᵗ ᶜᵒᵖʸᵖᵃˢᵗᵃ⋅ ˢᵗᵒᵖ ʳᵉᵃᵈᶦᶰᵍ ᵃᶫʳᵉᵃᵈʸ﹗ ᴵ ˢᵉᵉ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᵈᵒᶰᵗ ʷᵃᶰᶰᵃ ᵍᶦᵛᵉ ᵘᵖ ʳᵉᵃᵈᶦᶰᵍ﹖⋅⋅⋅ʷᵉᶫᶫ ᵒᵏ, ʸᵒᵘ ʷᵒᶰ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵗᶦᵐᵉ, ᵇᵘᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ˢʰᵒᵘᶫᵈ ᶜᵒᵖʸᵖᵃˢᵗᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵗʰᵃᶰᵏ ᵐᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ʷᵃˢᵗᶦᶰᵍ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵗᶦᵐᵉ ᵃᶰᵈ ˢᵗʳᵉˢˢᶦᶰᵍ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵉʸᵉˢ ᵗʰᵒ
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp
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