I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label:
For Women.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
He logs onto his Paypal account
twitchquotes:
Several hours later, Svenskeren sits alone in his room at the Cloud9 team house. All of the other players are fast asleep. He logs onto his Paypal account and a wan smile etches its way across his face.
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Iron Man v2
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⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠚⠒⠵⣶⣶⣶⣶⢪⢃⢇⠏⡳⡕⣝⢽⡽⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣺⠰⡱⢜⢮⡟⠁⠄⠄⠅⠅⢂⠐⠄⠐⢀⠄⠄⠄⠂⡁⠂
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spagootie
sometimes i like to pronounce spaghetti as "spagootie" and it has been working out fantastically so far. honestly, this single change has improved my life more than you could ever imagine. i highly suggest everyone try this out and see where your life goes. probably make all your dreams come true in like 5 business days.
next time you have a big bowl of piping hot marina drenched pasta in front of you say "spagootie time!!" or maybe something like "im so ready for this spagootie!" and see where the magic will take you.
Biohazard
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Please abide by the Reddit amendments
Sir, please abide by the Reddit amendments:
• Big Chungus is funny
• Keanu Reeves is the second coming of christ
• Elon Musk is the third coming of Christ (as well as wholesome 100, he knows Reddit memes)
• Fortnite is gay (gay = bad)
• Females are dumb while men are cool
• Nestle is the worst company ever (as well as the only bad company)
• Minecraft is the best game ever made
• No emojis allowed (except for 🗿 (yo angelo (it's funny because it's a Jojo reference (if you see someone commit a Jojo reference, you are legally forced to continue the reference chain, if you do not, you will be downvoted)))
• Being downvoted means you're wrong, if you think you're being wrongfully downvoted, rethink your comment, and if you still think you were wrongfully downvoted, rethink your comment until you understand what you did wrong
• Reddit is the best social media
Until I have seen major improvements in your behavior, your post will be awarded one downvote (aka Australia upvote, it's funny because Australia is on the opposite side of the globe compared to Europe and America, lol). This is your first and final warning, if you do not abide by these amendments in the future, everyone will dislike that.