I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label:
For Women.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Trump Wall
twitchquotes:
TRUMP WALL
TRUMP WALL
twitch chat
Riot Games
Imaqtpie takes a break from the stream
twitchquotes:
"Alright we fuckin lost," Michael says. "I'm gonna go piss." He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately bites Small Cat's vulnerable tail. As Small Cat yelps loudly in pain, Michael overturns the nearest chair, yelling "SMAKET I LOST" as loudly as he can. Lisha tries to calm him down, but Michael swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Michael wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
No, you are not a “Man of Culture”
No, you are not a “Man of Culture”. You are a 19 year old who has no romantic partner because you have a chronic addiction to anime porn where the characters dont look or sound any older than 13, seriously, the stuff you are watching should be illegal. Getting off to fictional drawings of ambiguous age THREE times a day is not even remotely cultured, it just makes you a sex-addicted pedophile. What’s gotten into you? You’re better than this.
Kripp stop showing your knee on stream
twitchquotes:
Kripp stop showing your knee on the stream, dont be like other female streamers. We are interested in your personality and not body.
twitch chat
Kripp
Be careful with what emojis you react with
Ok everyone since you don’t listen when I’m nice, I’m going to get mean.
Reacting to messages with a clown (🤡), a skull (💀), or a nerd face (🤓) isn’t funny. It’s not cool, it’s not interesting, it’s annoying.
These 3 emojis in particular aren’t funny, they’re RUDE. We as staff work hard to keep this place safe, and to have you all constantly react to our messages with mean emojis makes me FURIOUS.
STOP reacting to our messages with rude emojis. They do NOTHING but make you look really, really stupid.
It shows you have no rebuttals to our arguments, so you have to use juvenile tactics paramount to terrorism in order to stop us from being able to speak out truth.
FROM NOW ON, IF YOU REACT WITH ANY MEAN EMOJIS, I AM WRITING YOUR NAME DOWN.
IF YOU ARE A SERIAL REACTOR, YOUR USERNAME IS GOING TO A GOOGLE DOC. AT THE END OF THE MONTH, I WILL TAKE THIS DOC TO THE APPROPRIATE AUTHORITIES FOR THEM TO INVESTIGATE AND ARREST YOU.
This is your ONLY warning. Tread carefully…