[Copypasta] โš ๏ธ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Lapras

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ
ascii art
April 2017

Pokemon

I want to play control warrior but I'm missing...

twitchquotes: Hey Forsen, I want to play control warrior but I'm missing: Grommash, Alexstrasza, Harrison, Sylvanas, Baron Geddon, Shield Slam, Brawl, Naxx, and the Hearthstone game. Can you suggest replacements?
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen

Hearthstone

The Bible is an amazing manga

The Bible is an amazing manga. Chapters 1-5 were written by this guy named Moses but for some reason the author changed around. Abram is definitely my favorite character although for some reason they retconned his name to be Abraham, and in some regional publications his name is Ibrahim. The best ship is Abram x Sarah. Also, they totally nailed the new testament chapter, with some great character development. I never expected Judas' betrayal either.
April 2020

Weebs

Bag of bears

twitchquotes: ส•โ€ขแดฅโ€ขส” ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” ส•โ—•แดฅโ—•โœฟส” ส•เฒ แดฅเฒ ส” ส•โ€ขแดฅโ€ขส” ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” ส•โ—•แดฅโ—•โœฟส” ส•เฒ แดฅเฒ ส” Sorry, I dropped my bag of bears ส•โ€ขแดฅโ€ขส” ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” ส•โ—•แดฅโ—•โœฟส” ส•เฒ แดฅเฒ ส” ส•โ€ขแดฅโ€ขส” ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” ส•โ—•แดฅโ—•โœฟส” ส•เฒ แดฅเฒ ส”
twitch chat
October 2014
Trick2g

Grand Widow Faerlina needs a new succubus

twitchquotes: ๏ผจ๏ฝ‰ ๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ”๏ผ‡๏ฝ“ ๏ผง๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ผท๏ฝ‰๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝ— ๏ผฆ๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝŒ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ผŽ ๏ผฉ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝ— ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝƒ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ•๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ”๏ฝ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝ™ ๏ฝ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ™๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ผฉ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ† ๏ผฒ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝŒ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŸ ๏ผฉ ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ“๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝš๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝƒ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ•๏ฝ“๏ผŽ ๏ผด๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ‹๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ผ ๏ผซ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ผ
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing