[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Response to "who gives a shit"

Well you see, if you didn't care you wouldn't have said "Literally no one gives a shit" in the first place. If you truly did not care, you would of completely ignored the conversation from the very start. The fact that you said that just shows the childishness inside of you. All that saying "no one gives a shit" does is make you out to be an entitled, lower person who craves attention by trying to seem cool. Even if you do not care about this statement, the mere fact that you are saying "no one gives a shit" says a lot about you. And shows that you are in fact an unlikable individual. Regardless of if you care of not, these are goddamn facts, and facts do not care about your little peabrained fucking pissbaby feelings. No amount of not caring will change your unlikableness. Nobody will forget this moment and it'll be embedded into our minds for months, even years. Grow up a little before even thinking about responding to another innocent person with "No one gives a shit".
April 2022

My laptop gets hot when chat is spammed

twitchquotes: Guys can you please not spam the chat. My mom bought me this new laptop and it gets really hot when the chat is being spamed. Now my leg is starting to hurt because it is getting so hot. Please, if you don't want me to get burned, then dont spam the chat
twitch chat
August 2014

Classic

But my heart still isn't as broken as Patron Warrior

twitchquotes: Mʏ ᴡɪғᴇ ᴏғ 20 ʏᴇᴀʀs ʟᴇғᴛ ᴍᴇ ᴀ ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴀɢᴏ. I ғᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ʙɪᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴇɴᴅ ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜʀᴛs ɢʀᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ʜᴇʀ ᴄᴜsᴛᴏᴅʏ ᴏғ ᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ. Bᴜᴛ ᴍʏ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ sᴛɪʟʟ ɪsɴ'ᴛ ᴀs ʙʀᴏᴋᴇɴ ᴀs ᴘᴀᴛʀᴏɴ ᴡᴀʀʀɪᴏʀ.
twitch chat
September 2015
strifecro

Hearthstone

PepegaLicense

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣰⣿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠉⠉⢉⡉⠉⢉⣹⣿⣿⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⡟⠛⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⣿⠃⠄⢀⣀⢴⡦⣟⣿⠽⣶⣶⣯⣿⠛⠁⣤⣾⡟⠉⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⡤⠋⢹⣦⢣⡭⢭⣬⣟⣺⣿⣿⣃⠄⣸⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⣾⡟⣦⢴⣿⠿⣿⠰⠈⢿⡏⢿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⣿⠱⣶⣴⣒⣽⣮⣉⣲⡭⠚⢼⣫⣿⡟⢸⣿⡺⣿⣶⣄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⢠⡏⠈⠒⣩⠽⢛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣛⡛⠯⢽⣚⣾⣧⠇⣿⣿⣿⠆⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⢸⠁⠄⠄⠄⠰⠄⢀⣀⣲⣾⣿⣟⣉⣡⣴⢻⣿⣾⣽⠿⠋⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡇ ⢸⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⠄⠄⠉⠐⠒⠒⠺⠶⠶⠾⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃ ⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠄⠈⡆ ⠈⠛⠿⡿⠿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⠿⠿⢇⡀⠄⣀⠇ ⠄⠄⢸⠁⠄⢣⠄⠄⠄⢀⡏⠉⠉⡏⠉⠉⠉⡇⠄⠄⠄⢀⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⠒⠒⠊⠄⠄⠄⠘⠣⠤⠤⠋⠄⠄⠄⠈⠒⠒⠒⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Yup, it's gamer time!

twitchquotes: No women: check. No leftists: check. No minorities: check. Yup, it’s gamer time!
twitch chat
April 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing