To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday:
I’m sorry I kept referring to Fred’s liberally mayo’d oven-roasted chicken sub as a “bukkake special”. I’m sorry that you kept demanding that your teenage son explain why he was laughing so hard. I’m extra sorry that this turn of events led you to practically yelling “ETHAN, WHAT IS A BUKKAKE SPECIAL?” in the middle of a crowded restaurant.
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Well met m'ladies of Twitch Chat
twitchquotes:
Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ ᴍ'ʟᴀᴅɪᴇs ᴏғ Tᴡɪᴛᴄʜ Cʜᴀᴛ! I'ᴍ ᴀɴ ᴇʟɪɢɪʙʟᴇ, ғᴀsʜɪᴏɴᴀʙʟᴇ (ᴏɴʟʏ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀᴛᴇsᴛ ᴛᴀɪʟᴏʀᴇᴅ ғᴇᴅᴏʀᴀs) ʙᴀᴄʜᴇʟᴏʀ, ᴡʜᴏ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏs ᴏɴʟʏ ᴛʜᴇ ғɪɴᴇsᴛ Dᴏʀɪᴛᴏs (Cᴏᴏʟ Rᴀɴᴄʜ). Iғ ᴀɴʏ ʙᴜxᴏᴍ ғᴇᴍᴀʟᴇs (ɴᴏ ғᴀᴛᴛɪᴇs) ᴀʀᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇsᴛᴇᴅ ɪɴ sᴇx, ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ sᴇɴᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴀ Tᴡɪᴛᴄʜ PM.
twitch chat
Tempo Storm
Dab Me Up
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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Tyler1 breaks the rules
twitchquotes:
Tyler1 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with Draven? Tyler puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Faker breaks records. Bjergsen breaks records. Tyler fking 1 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer to be ALPHA. 
twitch chat
League of Legends
Reynad became his final form, the Reynoodle
twitchquotes:
Reynad layed in his bed. Something just wasnt right. He felt cold and uncomfortable. He needed something, but what? He went out to the kitchen to see if he could find something to do the trick. On the top shelf he found it. He laid back in bed and poured the spaghetti sauce all over his noodle body to keep warm for the night. Reynad became his final form, the Reynoodle. 
twitch chat
Reynad
NOT. SELLING. GAMESTOP.
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NOT. FUCKING. SELLING.
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NOT PRESSING “SELL” ON 1. FUCKING. SHARE.
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I’LL GO TO $0.00 BEFORE BILLIONAIRES GET ONE MORE PENNY FROM US.
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CAN’T STOP. WON’T STOP. GAMESTOP.
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TOMORROW, I THINK I’LL BE HOLDING THE LINE. MAYBE MAKE SOME TENDIES, TOO.
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I’LL SEE EVERY ONE OF YOU BEAUTIFUL APES ON PLUTO SOON, AND IT’S GOING TO JUST BE A SEA OF SPARKLING DIAMOND.
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I LOVE YOU, ALL, AND I’M NOT SELLING, AND I’M NOT FUCKING LEAVING. NOT ONE. FUCKING. SHARE!!!
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