[Copypasta] I Cri Evrytiem (Like This If You Cry Everytime)

Wun day, a boi n a gurl wer walkin w skool. Dey wer holdin handz and redy 2 seluhbrayt der 2 hour aniverssaree. Da gurl turnt 2 da boi n say "bbz, do u luv me 4ever?!" Da boi turnt 2 her n say "NO!" Da gurl wuz <3brokn n run away frum da boi. She run in2 da street n got hit by a car. Da boi run ovur 2 da gurl n hold her az she dyieng "I wuz gonna say, I luv u 5ever" Da boy den pull out hiz gat n shoot himself ded. As his bodee hit da assfalt, a bawks rolled of his poccet. A bootyful dimund ring wuz nside. Liek dis if u cry evrytiem
September 2021
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Genuine Kripp Smile

twitchquotes: Look at him, look at that smile. That's a genuine Kripp Smile™ there if I ever saw one. Now chat, if you pay close attention you'll realize that these rare, genuine demonstrations of happiness only actually happen when Kripp is playing Hearthstone. Not Artifact, not Magic, not anything else. Hearthstone is where Kripp's heart really is at. We just have to understand and support that, no matter what.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Coronavirus

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⡟⢉⠁⠈⡻⠘⠏⠀⠹⢛⣷⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡞⢿⡄⠀⢻⡴⣇⣀⣷⣴⢄⢀⡖⡾⠁⢀⣼⢛⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⣄⠈⠙⢦⣿⣶⠞⠋⠉⠁⣀⣄⡀⠉⠙⠻⢦⣾⣵⠟⠉⢠⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⣯⣙⠷⣄⡴⠋⣤⣤⣤⠀⢸⡏⢉⣿⠀⣠⡤⣤⡘⢷⣤⡴⣛⣹⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣄⠀⠉⢛⡿⠁⠘⣧⣀⣼⠃⠀⠙⠛⠁⠀⢿⣄⣸⠇⠀⢹⡟⠉⠁⢀⣄⠀ ⠀⡾⡙⣛⣳⣾⠁⠀⡀⣀⠉⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢁⡀⡀⠀⢿⣶⣛⣋⣻⠀ ⠀⠉⠈⠉⠈⡹⠀⠸⠁⠙⣷⠀⠀⢸⡏⠉⣷⠀⠀⢰⠉⠈⣣⠀⠸⡉⠉⠉⠉⠀ ⠀⣿⠛⣛⣻⣿⠀⠈⠛⠙⠁⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠉⠀⣼⣽⣛⡛⣹⠀ ⠀⠘⠟⠉⠁⣘⣧⠀⢀⡶⠛⢶⡂⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⣴⠟⢳⡄⠀⢰⣏⠀⠉⠙⠛⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⡶⢛⣭⠟⢧⡈⠷⠶⠾⠁⢰⡏⠙⣷⠀⠻⢦⠾⢃⣴⠿⢯⣛⢳⡶⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠻⠟⠁⢀⡴⣿⢶⣄⡀⠀⠈⠛⠚⠋⠀⢀⣠⡴⣾⢷⣄⠀⠹⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢺⣏⣴⠏⠀⣸⠟⠝⠓⠶⠶⠖⠛⠛⣯⠀⠘⢷⣙⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⣶⣏⣬⠁⠀⣥⢠⠆⠀⣰⣘⣷⠄⠈⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⠘⠳⠾⠛⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ CORONAVIRUS IS HERE CHAT monkaW
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

Lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army. It has come to our attention that you've been 'BroFisting' many of our citizens against their will. If you continue this, I have full authority to launch a nuclear attack against you and your evil 5 dollar club. You've been warned.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

DrDisrespect Facebook Gaming

twitchquotes: Anyways, um... I'm, trying to partner with Facebook Gaming, do you know what Facebook Gaming is? Anybody know what Facebook Gaming is? No, not Facebook, I think thats a social media website. I'm talkin' Facebook Gaming. Anyways, it's a two week old like, streaming platform that protects against unemployment and unwanted wage labor that may be looming in my future. That's my story, I emailed em a bunch of stuff. Sent 'em around the la inbox. Direct messages, stuff like that.
twitch chat
July 2020
DrDisRespectLIVE

Kermit the frog caused 9/11

Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing