[Copypasta] I Cri Evrytiem (Like This If You Cry Everytime)

Wun day, a boi n a gurl wer walkin w skool. Dey wer holdin handz and redy 2 seluhbrayt der 2 hour aniverssaree. Da gurl turnt 2 da boi n say "bbz, do u luv me 4ever?!" Da boi turnt 2 her n say "NO!" Da gurl wuz <3brokn n run away frum da boi. She run in2 da street n got hit by a car. Da boi run ovur 2 da gurl n hold her az she dyieng "I wuz gonna say, I luv u 5ever" Da boy den pull out hiz gat n shoot himself ded. As his bodee hit da assfalt, a bawks rolled of his poccet. A bootyful dimund ring wuz nside. Liek dis if u cry evrytiem
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripparrian is NEVER lucky?

twitchquotes: (โ€ขโŒฃโ€ข) Daddy, is it true as the legend says. That Kripparrian is NEVER lucky? ( อกยฐโ•ญอœส–โ•ฎอกยฐ ) Yes little dong. The legend holds true even to this day.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

neverlucky

John Wick is in grave danger

twitchquotes: Epic Fortnite gamers, it's time to rise and grind! John Wick is in grave danger. Our friend is trapped in Dusty Divots surrounded by fake defaults with no shields or weaponry, and the only one who can help is you to save him! What he needs is your credit card number, the three numbers on the back, as well as the expiration month and date. BE SWIFT, GAMERS. You gotta do it. The circle is closing and John Wick needs your assistance fast so that he can acquire that bread, nae nae on those NOOBS, and achieve another SICK W! YEAH!
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

Helicopter just dropped down to say

damn this shit crazy dawg but โ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌ.โ—™.โ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌโ–ฌ โ–‚โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–‚ โ—ขโ—คโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„ โ—ขโ—ค โ–ˆโ–„ โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€ โ•ฌ โ—ฅ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ—ค โ•โ•โ•ฉโ•โ•โ•ฉโ• โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ just dropped down to say โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ You hella gay, no cap โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ โ˜ป/ โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ /โ–Œ โ•ฌโ•โ•ฌ / \
December 2020

Nerf MEGA Mastodon blaster ad

twitchquotes: NerfRedBlaster Dominate Nerf blaster battles with the first-ever motorized Nerf MEGA blaster! NerfBlueBlaster The Nerf MEGA Mastodon blaster boasts incredible rapid-fire speeds to send MEGA Whistler darts screaming through the air from its integrated 24-dart drum. NerfRedBlaster Bring the MEGA Mastodon blaster into action to overwhelm opponents with its imposing size. NerfBlueBlaster Use the shoulder strap for easy maneuvering to be ready for Nerf battles anytime, anywhere. NerfRedBlaster
twitch chat
February 2017

Kripp, Blizzard here again

twitchquotes: Kripp, Blizzard here again. We've noticed that you've been away from Hearthstone for at least 2 hours. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still mages? We're serious about nerfing them if it's a problem to you. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon!
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing