Wun day, a boi n a gurl wer walkin w skool. Dey wer holdin handz and redy 2 seluhbrayt der 2 hour aniverssaree.
Da gurl turnt 2 da boi n say "bbz, do u luv me 4ever?!"
Da boi turnt 2 her n say "NO!"
Da gurl wuz <3brokn n run away frum da boi. She run in2 da street n got hit by a car.
Da boi run ovur 2 da gurl n hold her az she dyieng
"I wuz gonna say, I luv u 5ever"
Da boy den pull out hiz gat n shoot himself ded.
As his bodee hit da assfalt, a bawks rolled of his poccet. A bootyful dimund ring wuz nside.
Liek dis if u cry evrytiem
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Ahsoka Tano
twitchquotes:
Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems. Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
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Illuminati eye (Eye of Providence)
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Masturbation Notice from school
MASTURBATION NOTICE
It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy
The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties
The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this
Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal
If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities
Thank you for your cooperation
Among Us pick up lines
Thankful to have you as a crewmate… but do you want to add a letter and become screwmates instead?
Hey, are you one of my tasks? Because I really want to do you.
Hey, are you a vent? Because I’m the imposter and I’d love to come in you.
I have a lot of tasks to complete still, but I’d love to do you first.
Hey, call me the MedBay… because I’d love to scan your body.
Figuring out the imposter is hard…. but I’ve got something harder.
I’m jealous of your hat… Because it gets to be on you.
Hey are you busy later? Because I’d love to explore your lower engine.
Hey, you’re done your tasks right? Wanna come explore my cockpit then?
If you’re the imposter, I’d love to be the vent… That way you can come inside me whenever you want.
Damn, I wish you were a task… Because I’d have no problem doing you and over and over.
Hey did you just kill me? Because I’ve got a big bone sticking out now…
Among Us / Amogus
THE LEATHER CLUB IS 2 BLOCKS DOWN
twitchquotes:
HEY BUDDY I THINK YOU GOT THE WRONG DOOR THE LEATHER CLUB IS 2 BLOCKS DOWN
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