[Copypasta] Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Do not call your significant other honey

Do ๐Ÿ‘ not ๐Ÿ‘ call ๐Ÿ‘ your ๐Ÿ‘ significant ๐Ÿ‘ other ๐Ÿ‘ honey ๐Ÿ‘ unless ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ are ๐Ÿ‘ a ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ are ๐Ÿ‘ appropriating ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ culture, ๐Ÿ‘ this ๐Ÿ‘ cannot ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ accepted ๐Ÿ‘
October 2021

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

Spaghetti out of Kripp's underwear

twitchquotes: I love spaghetti, its actually my passion. I have always wanted to eat Greek spaghetti, specifically out of Kripp's underwear where his dongers are Kappa
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Please fortnite i really Like big boob

Please fortnite i really Like big boob Like it would Be big and Add sex so i can Sex th e skin And Feet is Sex too Can there be special emote for big boo skin where is will Take off cloth And show be Feet and I will be like mmm Sex so much I feet Yes! Plaese
April 2021

Fortnite

This message is protected by a special font

twitchquotes: Tแ•ผIแ”• แ—ฐแ•ฎแ”•แ”•แ—ฉGแ•ฎ Iแ”• แ‘ญแ–‡OTแ•ฎแ‘•Tแ•ฎแ—ช แ—ทY แ—ฉ แ”•แ‘ญแ•ฎแ‘•Iแ—ฉแ’ช แ–ดOแ‘ŽT. IT'แ”• Iแ—ฐแ‘ญOแ”•แ”•Iแ—ทแ’ชแ•ฎ TO แ‘•Oแ‘ญY IT.
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing