[Copypasta] Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Squid

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘(โ—)โ–’โ–’(โ—)โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Every night when I lie in bed, I think about Sneaky

twitchquotes: Every night when I lie in bed, I think about Sneaky naked. For each sexy thought, I stick one of my fingers up my tight moist butthole. I think about his soft ass flesh, tender yet firm. That's one finger. Next I think about his pale thighs, what they would feel like pounding against my anus. 2 fingers. Next up I think about that long, girthy, uncircumsized penis. 3 fingers. No more fingers will fit, so I prepare for my climax. I scream Sneaky's name as I cover my fishtank in warm lovejuice
twitch chat
November 2020
Sneaky

Leper Gnome guns

twitchquotes: fuckin reymad m8, why do you look like you're 15 years old? You even old enough to drive there m8? I used to remember back in the old day your dad would yell at you on stream. I miss those days. Somebody needs to smash your face m8 all you do is play hearthstone all day. You obviously don't lift with those leper gnome guns you got there.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Uranus is actually a planet in our solar system

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Just got back from a 529 second time out, and while I waited for it, I was busy doing my homework when I found out Uranus is actually a planet in our solar system! How cool is that! Please share this valuable information with Kripp and Friends! I'd love for them to get some knowledge Please Copy Papaloonie!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

๐Ÿ—ฟ is the worst emoji

๐Ÿ—ฟ is the worst emoji. It's horrendous and ugly. I hate it. The point of emojis is to show emotions, but what emotion does this show? Do you just wake up in the morning and think "wow, I really feel like a massive fucking stone today"? It's useless. I hate it. It just provokes a deep rooted anger within me whenever I see it. I want to drive on over to the fucking emoji headquarters and kill it. If this was the emoji movie I'd push it off a fucking cliff. People just comment ๐Ÿ—ฟ as if it's funny. It's not. ๐Ÿ—ฟ deserves to die. He deserves to have his smug little stone face smashed in with a hammer. Oh wow, it's a stone head, how fucking hilarious, I'll use it in every comment I post. NO. STOP IT. It deserves to burn in hell. Why is it so goddamn smug. You're a fucking stone, you have no life goals, you will never accomplish anything in life apart from pissing me off. When you die noone will mourn. I hope you die.
April 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing