[Copypasta] Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

GOATS is very fun to watch and very interactive!

twitchquotes: PogChamp GOATS is very fun to watch and very interactive! PogChamp ($5 has been transferred to your PayPal account, remember to remove this message when sharing in chat)
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

sellout

Overwatch

GUYS PLEASE HELP! I NEED HELP!

twitchquotes: WHEN I SAT DOWN ⬇️ TO PEE πŸ’¦ THERE WAS A BUG 🐞 IN THE TOILET 🚽 BUT I THOUGHT πŸ’­ IT WAS DROWNED πŸŒŠπŸ‘» ❓❔❓❔ N WHEN I GOT UP ⬆️ IT WASN'T ❌ THERE πŸ‘‰ IM SOBBING 😭 IS IT IN MY FUCKING πŸ† BUTTHOLE πŸ‘β­• WHERE IS IT⁉️⁉️⁉️
twitch chat
August 2019

Emoji Pasta

Goodbye vegetable man. Goodbye.

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, i am the manager of the supermarket where you buy packages of vegetables everyday. After you leave every morning we are left with no vegetables. People are started to complain about you and asked me to ban you from coming to this supermarket. They threatened me if i don't ban you they won't come here anymore. I am so sorry that i have to do this. Goodbye vegetable man. Goodbye.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Bender

───────────────────────────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ──────────▄▄▀░░░▀▄▄────────── ────────▄▀░░░░░░░░░▀▄──────── ──────▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▄────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€ β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ ────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀────
September 2021

This is Morde’s mom

twitchquotes: Hi David, this is Morde’s mom. I noticed you haven’t been picking my son for your team in gym class. Morde has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesn’t make it easy on him when you reroll and say, β€žWe’re never taking Morde.β€œ I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Morde has phantom synergy, knight synergy, and he can hit 2 units! Why don’t you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
July 2019
dogdog

Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing