[Copypasta] KFC rejection letter

Hi Sophie, Thank you for your application to Team KFC. We're cluckin' delighted you're keen to join our flock, however at this moment in time your skills aren't the secret recipe the Colonel is looking for. But we'd love to hear from you again when you have some more experience under your wing, so please give us a cluck if you would like to apply in the future. Best Wishes, Team KFC
October 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon

twitchquotes: Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon™. As many of you know, we have recently bought over "Twitch tv". Users must now buy 'Emotes' such as " Kappa ", " Kreygasm " and " FrankerZ ". If users proceed to use these emotes without buying and owning them, we will have to, not only remove the account of the user but also, shut down the stream we have evidence that is has been used in. Thank you, do not copy and paste this. This is business, kid.
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

PepePls

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⢿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠤⢄⣀⠐⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠐⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣉⣒⣄⠉⠉⠉⢉⣀⣂⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⡄⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⣐⠭⠒⠉⠉⠉⠉⣒⣳⠈⠛⠂⠀⠀⣒⣛⡢⠈⢿ ⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠠⣤⣶⠖⠙⠀⡉⢻⡿⣶⣿⣿⠁⡂⠠⠈⢿⠗⢸ ⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠂⠭⠤⠤⠤⣤⠄⠊⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣿ ⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠒⠂⠈⠁⠘⢿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣟⣛⣛⣻⡶⠶⠶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡶⠾⢃⣼⣿ ⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢄⡀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠓⠛⠻⠿⠿⠷⠿⠟⢃⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⢠⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡶⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⢠⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡄⠀⢠⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Pepe

My 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe"

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, mom here, my 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe". I dont know what that is, but a quick Google search shows Kripp subscribers are linked with NaCL overdose disorder. Can you explain this? - Sincerely, a concerned parent
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

salty

Trick2g, my son keeps saying lata and the gates

twitchquotes: Hello, is this "@Trick2g "? My son just got back from elementary school and keeps saying "lata" this and "the gates" that. He even told me how he wants to be a professional gate opener to all the asian hunnies. Please no Kapparino pastarino
twitch chat
September 2014
Trick2g

Regi storms in the TSM meeting room

twitchquotes: In the TSM meeting room, Regi stormed in with the fury of God by his side. As everyone tried to flee, the Monkey King channeled cyclone effectively knocking the new imports back to China, he pulled his staff out of his ass and knocked Tactical back to Team Liquid. Spica and Huni manage to escape, but they are greeted at the exit, a contract enticing them to stay for 100 FTX bitcoins. They choose to stay.
twitch chat
March 2022

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing