[Copypasta] bbz will u luv me 4evr

gurl was walkin2 skewl wit her bf n they were crossin da rode. she sed "bbz will u luv me 4evr" he said "NO.." ... da gurl cryed N ran across da rode b4 da green man came on the sine. boy was cryin and went to pic up her body. she was ded. he whispered 2 her corpse "I ment 2 sey i will luv u FIVE-ever..." (dat mean he luv her moar den 4evr) xxx~*...LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVRY TIME...~*xxx
March 2021

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Learning how to throw like a pro

twitchquotes: Hey Imaqtpie! Thanks for the quality stream. I'm watching with my son and you have become his mentor. He is going into baseball so he's learning how to throw like a pro from you! Thanks again!
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June 2017
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This is why eSports will never...

twitchquotes: This is why eSports will never hit the general public as hard as for instance soccer. the way you kids are spamming this chat is just ruining the whole experience for a grown man. Seriously. Grow up.
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August 2018

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Stroll in my local GameStop

stroll into my local GameStop looking to pick up a copy of Binding of Isaac grab the game and take it to the charming maiden at the register "Pardon me, milady...but could you ring me up? A shame I don't have your number or I'd ring you up instead..." she giggles and takes the game, blushing as her fingers brush mine due to my fingerless gloves her eyes widen as she reads the game's title "Wow, I've never seen anyone buy this before! You must have special taste!" I smile and ready a witty response when suddenly a voice rings out from behind "Hahaha look at what this โ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅ is buying! That's not Call of Duty Advanced Memefare! What a piece of โ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅ!" I quickly turn around, my cloak billowing behind me, to discern the source of the rude outburst generic dudebro caricature with a sports team cap and "the guy that beat you up that one time behind the school in early October" shirt is standing there guffawing "Excuse me sir...you may disparage my person if you wish, but it is untoward to swear in front of a lady." "โ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅ you โ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅโ™ฅ!" I smile quietly and tip my fedora low across my eyes, concealing them "As you wish..." I quickly swing my cane into his kneecap before he can react he bellows and charges forward I expertly sidestep him and the cashier screams as he crashes into the counter I draw my sword-cane and mutter a quiet oath as I drive it deep into his back "...requiescat in pace..." As I clean my blade the girl walks out from behind the counter, twirling her hair with her fingers "So...maybe you'd like to come over to my place to play that game sometime...? "No thanks, milady, it's only single player. Besides..." I sheath my sword "You're not my type." skate away on my Heelys
January 2021

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Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

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KappaPride

Do British people even exist?

Do british people actually exist? I mean, they must be a meme, there is a not a single thing about them. And I mean it. Let's go through the evidence: Where are they from? Not a single country in the world is named Britain. Some people say they come from England, and England is inside Britain, but if that was the case they would be British they would be Englanders. Also, heard some silly theories about them coming from whales. Guys, no, whale people do not exist. Whales live in the sea. There is a consensus on British people coming from Europe, but then we are left with a whole continent of possible locations. That's as good as nothing. What do they eat? Every country has at least one main dish. Even the US has their burgers. But these British people, what do they eat? Heard some people associating them with tea, but everyone knows that's an Asian thing. Shouldn't they come from Europe? One of these two points must be wrong them. To me, it looks too sketchy. What language do they speak? I challenge you, putting all my money and my ass on the line here, to find a supposed ""British"" person speaking their native language. Most of then just speak a broken ENGLISH. Yes, english. Really suspicious, huh? And I even tried to look deeper into it. Maybe british just SOUND like english, just like spanish could sound like portuguese for a non-speaker. So I looked up "british dictionary on google" and what I found was shocking: every word in there was AMERICAN. I kid you not. What this could mean is beyond my capabilities, but I can safely assure you that british people do not exist .
December 2020

British People

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Text-to-Speech Playing