[Copypasta] So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix.

So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behaviour. For example, if you eat it is likely that you swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that because that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why am I writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging shit again and I am not sure how to respond to that.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Y U NO

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€ โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
December 2020

Hello. I am a 15 year old Rhinoceros

twitchquotes: Hello. I am a 15 year old Rhinoceros. The only problem is that my horn on my head is soft and limp. As you may know this is very devastating to a rhino like myself. If there are any rhinos out there that can help me with my problem it would be appreciated. Please dont copy paste this. This is my story.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kolento

Henry Stickmin

โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โ ”โ ˆโ โ „โ ’โ ขโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก โ –โ ‰โ โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ ‰โ ’โขคโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข โ Žโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโฃ†โ „โ „โขปโก†โ ™โฃ†โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฟโ „โ „โ „โฃทโ „โ ˜โก„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฟโ „โ „โ „โฃฟโ „โ „โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˜โก†โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฟโ „โ „โขฐโกŸโ „โข โ ‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ™โฃ„โ „โข€โ „โ „โ „โฃธโ ‡โ „โ „โกฟโ โข โ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโ “โขคโฃ‰โ โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ€โกคโ žโ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฝโ ‰โ ‰โ ‰โ ‰โ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โกŒโกโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก˜โข โ โก†โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขฐโ โขธโ „โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก‡โ „โ ธโ „โขƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‡โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โก†โ „โ ˆโก†โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โก‡โ „โ „โขƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โก‡โ „โ „โ ˜โก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โกŸโก„โ „โ „โขฃโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ธโ „โขฐโ โ ˆโ „โ „โ Œโ ‘โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃธโขฐโขŒโก˜โ „โ „โ ˜โ „โ šโขฟโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ นโ ธโ „โ ‡โ „โ „โ „โ ˜โฃ„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˜โก„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก˜โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขฐโ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโก†โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ †โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขกโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃผโฃคโฃคโฃ„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˜โ ฟโ ฟโ ทโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‰โ ›โ ›โ ‰โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „
ascii art
August 2021

Going against the Summoners Code

twitchquotes: Hello twitch chat, this is "xXswaglordDarienXx" from Rito Games. I've noticed a lot of you are copy pasting the same message over and over again and that unfortunately goes against the Summoners Code, so I will be forced to ban everyone in this chat. Thank you and please do not copy and paste this message.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

You will never be an anime girl

You will never be an anime girl. You have no ancestry, you have no weebship, you have no skills that would make neon Tokyo ever want you. You are a shut-in self-hating nerdy man twisted by delusions of mythical Katana superiority and exposure to media folded over 3000 times into a disgusting mockery of metalworkings perfection. All 'validation' you get from other people in this position couldn't be worse in making you believe that spending years of your life learning a the globally useless talents of Uwudo and Iya-giri to a ไธญไบŒ level was a worthwhile ไฝฟใ„ๆ–น of ใŠๅ‰'s time, but one can't expect that an individual as ็พž่€ป as ใƒ†ใƒก will ever know the value of the ไปฒ้–“ you threw away in doing that. Actual Sasukes are ใ™ใ”ใ„ ใ‚ญใƒขใ„ by you. Thousands of years of ่‡ช็„ถ้€ฒๅŒ– have allowed ไพ to identify ๅฝ็‰ฉ่ชž from mannerisms and ่จ€่ชžๅŠ› alone. Even if your written text of self-hatred and attention begging akin to a ้‡Ž่‰ฏ็Šฌ somehow passes as normal (ใ—ใชใ„ใ‚ˆใ€ใฉ้˜ฟๅ‘†), any Soul Eater person will immediately ไธกๆ–ญใ€€all ่ฟทใ„ใ€€when they ่žใ the ๅฃฐ and ๅบƒๅณถ-ben of someone who is not only a basic ไธ‹ๅฟ at best, but worth no more than ใ‚ดใƒŸใ‚ซใ‚น in skills, accomplishments, and no ใƒฏใ‚คใƒ• yes ใƒ•ใƒฌใƒณใƒ‰. You will never be ๅนธใ›ใŠใกใ‚ƒใ‚ๆฉŸ่ƒฝใ€‚ You wrench out a ๅฝ็ฌ‘ใ„ and ๏ฝ—๏ฝ—๏ฝ—่‰ to yourself believing that watching a content creator that you understand 20% of at best is somehow superior than watching your own ่ˆน้•ท, as you project your disgusting traits onto your ๅง”ๅ“ก้•ท. However, deep inside you feel the ไธๅฎ‰ creeping up like a ๆกœ, ready to crush you under the ใƒใ‚นใƒˆ2ไธ‰ไธ€ใ€€Zzใ€€ใ‚ฌใƒณใƒ€ใƒ , and you know that. You know that all you do now is have an entirely new ใƒชใ‚นใƒŠใƒผ in which to be ็„ก่ฆ–, and not even the exotic trait of beingใ€€ๆตทๅค–ใƒ‹ใƒƒใ‚ญ makes up for just how uninteresting of a ็„ก่จ€่ตคใ‚นใƒ‘ you are. Eventually itโ€™ll be too much to bear - youโ€™ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold ใฏใ‚ใกใ‚ƒใพ. Your ใƒžใƒž will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearableใ€€ๆฅใ–ใ‚‰ใ— and ใ‚ดใƒŸใ‚ซใ‚นๆญปใญ. Theyโ€™ll bury you with a ๅฆ–ๆ€ช marked with your ้ ˜ๅŸŸๅฑ•้–‹, and every ไธŠๅผฆใฎ้ฌผ for the rest of eternity will know a ้ป’่ˆน is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a ใ‚ฎใƒซใ‚ถใƒฌใƒณ that is ่ชžใ‚Š้ƒจๅนฝ้œŠ. This is your ้‹ๅ‘ฝ. This is what you chose. There is no turning back. ๆ†Žใ„ yourself and ่ฌใ‚Œ for being ใƒชใ‚ขๅ…… to some Virtual entity that exists only in your mind while actual people put in effort to learn English for the valid reason of it being the global language.
April 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing