[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

PETA must be alerted

twitchquotes: Last night at Greece's most prominent Red Light District, Kripp was seen pimping out Catarrian for very cheap. PETA must be alerted of this horrid cat prostitution ring hidden under this "Twitch streaming"
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

U bluudi wonka

I, U bluudi wonka, feck'n bos droiva don' went en doid on ya m8, musta bin a reyl sed day 4 ya mum m8, ah bluudi eal, E wuuda smocked u roight en the gabber so ya C staars 4 doin wot ya bin doin, pal.neavamnd, feck u m8, get shrektd
November 2014

Dragon Rider

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄▄▄██ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄▄▄██████ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄██████████ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▀█████████ ░░░░░░░░░░░▄██▀░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░██████ ░░░░░░░░░▄▀▀░█░░▄██░░░░░░░░██▄▄░░░██████ ░░░░░░░▄█▀░▄█░▄█▀█░░░░░░░▄▀▄░██░░▄██████ ░░░░░░░▄█▀░▀▄█▀▄█▀░░░░░░░▀▄░░▀██▄███████ ░░░░░█▀░░░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░█▄▀▀█████████ ░░░░█░░░░░▄██░░▀▄░░░░░░░░░▄▀░░░░████████ ░░░█▀░░▄█▀██▄░░░░▀▄░░░░░▄▀░▄█▄░░░███████ ░░█░░░█████▀▀▀░░░░░▀░▄▄▀░▄████░░░███████ ░▄█░░░▀▀░░░░░░░░░░░▄▀░░▄█████▀░░░▄██████ ▄█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀█▄▀▀░▄▄▀░░▄▄▀███████ ▀░░░▄▄▄█░░░▄▄░░░░░░░░░░▄█▀░░▄▀▀░░░░░▀▀▀▀ ░░▄▀▀░░░░▄█▀░▀▀▀▀▄█▄░▄▄█▄▄░▀▀▄▄░░░░░░░░░ ▄▀░░░░▄█▀░░░░░░░░░██████████▄░▀▀███▄▄▄▄░ ░▄▄██▀░░░░░░░░▄████████████████░████████
August 2018

Wow, that actually killed me

twitchquotes: :thinking: The year is 2034. QT lies on his death bed. As he lies there in his last breath he whispers: "Wow, that actually killed me." :thinking:
twitch chat
January 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

ANY LOSERS? v2

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November 2020

NSFW

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