[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Roblox has taken over my sons life

Roblox has taken over my sons life, I need someone here to help me, it started off pretty small, he told me he was into this game called Roblox. I looked it over, seemed nice. That was 5 years ago, now my son has locked himself inside his room, using a pile of roblox toy plastic to guard me from opening it. When he comes out (The 1 time he does a week) he carries 5 bottles of empty soda pop filled with human waste and empty bags of food and throws them away. He will not speak to me, and will not leave the house, only will play Roblox. I've tried it all, but he seems to find a way to play roblox. I tired killing the WiFi but he payed someone in robux to let him have his, so he has his own wifi source, and trying to take away his PC causes him to go into a fit of terror, where he'll scream "ROBLOX ESCAPE THE BOSSBABY RAINBOW OBBY FIGDET SPINNER" until he gets it back please someone tell me how I stop this. I've tried doing a thing I call "Good Robloxian Robux" where I give him Robux when he does good things, like come out of his room, or doesn't use more then 20+ hours of wifi a day but it only works so much please someone tell me how I can get my son back, I miss that boy, he's 25 now, and needs a job
March 2021

How will this affect Rick James?

twitchquotes: Yesterday I walked into the bathroom and my brother was taking a shit. I don't know why he didn't lock the door, but before I could leave he asked me to grab him a roll of toilet paper. As I was handing it to him he jumped up and smacked a hand full of shit across my face...How will this affect Rick James?
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Forsen's face

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April 2022
Forsen

forsenLicense

⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣩⣤⣤⣤⣬⣭⣭⣭⣭⣉⣙⣛⣛⣛⣛⡛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣌⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢡⡿⠛⠉⠩⣭⣉⣉⣉⣉⡛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣿⣶⠘⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⣼⠄⢨⣭⠄⠄⢹⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⡟⠉⣴⡇⣿⣿⡄⣿⣿ ⣿⢀⡇⢠⠄⠄⡄⠄⣹⣟⠄⠄⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⠋⣴⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿ ⡏⠘⠁⣿⣧⣤⣤⣶⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠈⠑⠄⠄⢰⣿⠃⠄⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣇⢸⣿ ⠄⠄⢰⣿⡿⢟⣿⣿⠅⠄⠄⠄⠠⣶⣤⣀⠄⠄⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⠁⠉⠉⠉⢸⣿ ⠄⠄⡼⢃⠰⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠏⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⠄⠄⠁⢰⡶⠖⠈⠑⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⢢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⠿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻ ⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⢀ ⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⢠⣤⣤⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⣀⣀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

This is the shittiest reply ever Modern Warfare version

twitchquotes: This is the shittiest reply ever. Modern Warfare requires movement, camping, claymoring, rotating, and hitting shots. There are not “positions” in Modern Warfare. A kickers job is LITERALLY to kick. Horrible analogy, kind of embarrassing.
twitch chat
December 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing