[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
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Eminem Stan lyrics

twitchquotes: Dear kripp, I wrote you but still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin' Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's dexter? My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7 But she don't know you like I know you kripp, no one does She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up, you gotta call me man I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, Stan P.S. we should be together too
twitch chat
September 2019
Kripp

GivePlz

⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⢀⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣄⡈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣦⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠈⢳⡄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠖⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⣿⡄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⢄⡙⠋⠻⡄⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣩⠟⠟⠀⣼⣿⡄⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣭⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣴⣿⣿⣷⠀⠛⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢰⣶⣄⠈ ⣏⣉⣛⣛⣛⣛⣥⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⠟⠀ ⡇⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠈⠁⢀⣼ ⡇⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⣋⣥⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⣾⣿⣿
May 2019

This is why eSports will never...

twitchquotes: This is why eSports will never hit the general public as hard as for instance soccer. the way you kids are spamming this chat is just ruining the whole experience for a grown man. Seriously. Grow up.
twitch chat
August 2018

Classic

Pokemon Marathon Season 2 Intermission

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper HOLD IT ResidentSleeper HOW PREDICTABLE ResidentSleeper THIS IS BORING ResidentSleeper NOT MY SHOULDER ResidentSleeper VERY SCARY-O ResidentSleeper THIS IS BORING AGAIN ResidentSleeper UNINTELLIGENT ResidentSleeper ?????? ResidentSleeper WANNA SHARE MY BLANKET ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
September 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

Moai statue head

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October 2021
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