Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
Pickpocket hot tip
twitchquotes:
Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
twitch chat
Classic
Sometimes I sit alone in my bathroom with the light off and pretend to be you
twitchquotes:
Kripp if you're here right now reading this I want you to know I dream of you. Sometimes I sit alone in my bathroom with the light off and pretend to be you. I'll say things like "hey guys how's it goin' Kripparrian here", and for a brief moment I feel you inside me...
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
CTRL + W to activate mod status
twitchquotes:
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ 
The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this.โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this.โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
twitch chat
Classic
Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police
twitchquotes:
๐ข ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
๐ข ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Now Playing: Despacito
twitchquotes:
ษดแดแดก แดสแดสษชษดษข: Despacito
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโชโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโ โโ โ โบโบโ โ โ 1:17 / 3:48 โ โโโโ ๐โ แดดแดฐ โ โ โโ
twitch chat