Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin.
Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time.
I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
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KKona boy I was at that darn there
twitchquotes:
boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it
boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it
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How Trump can still win
How Trump can still win: under section 34 of Secure Credits and Taxes act, the president can induce artificial inflation and if the inflation gets high enough, technically Trump can declare emergency powers and not leave the office, google "Trump SCAT inflation rule 34" for more info
2020 US Election
Debunking the existence of females
"FEMALES" DON'T EXIST!!!!!!๐ฑ๐ฑ
A "FEMALE" is a fake person designed by the ๐คฎGOVERNMENT๐คฎ to enslave men!!!!๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
PROOF๐๐ "FEMALE" stands for;
F ake
E ngineered
MALE !!!!
๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
So be ๐ฐ๐ฐCAREFUL๐ฐ๐ฐ around someone who claims to be a ๐ก๐ก"FEMALE"๐ก๐ก because they might be a ๐ฑSPY๐ฑ sent by the ๐คฎGOVERNMENT ๐คฎ ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
If you ๐กDONT๐ก farward this to 20 ๐จโ๐ฆฑpeople๐ง ๐จLITTLE TOMMY๐ฑ will crawl out of your sink and eat Your eyeballs ๐๏ธ๐๏ธ
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
Emoji Pasta
I'm still not as salty as you
twitchquotes:
Reynad, I went to Isreal the other week. I went to the dead sea and floated on the incredibly salty water. I managed to get some in my mouth, and then came out ate a pretzel, and a hot dog with extra salt. And then ate an entire salt lick. I'm still not a salty as you. 
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Reynad
salty
Don't feel too bad after Team Liquid destroys G2
twitchquotes:
Hey EU fans, don't feel too bad after Team Liquid absolutely destroys G2 tonight. Being the 2nd best region in the world (after North America of course) is still something to be very proud of! ๐
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Riot Games