[Copypasta] I hate the French language

I struggle to find the right words to describe just how much I hate the French language. I'm not racist but I think the world would really be a better place if all French speakers just stopped speaking French and learned a normal language. Nothing about this language remotely makes sense, or is even internally consistent. Why are there so many silent letters? Half the words have pronunciations which somewhat resemble their spelling, and the other half seems like French people just decided to add a bunch of letters so they can act like they're better than everyone else. The language seems like it's deliberately constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. Why the hell do verbs have different conjugations for you, me, he/she, we, you(plural), and them? Even the English language doesn't have that many arbitrary conjugations. I made an honest attempt to learn French, I really did, but the language is just filled with bullshit rules for grammar and everything else. Whichever way you look at it, it's almost as if French is constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. For real, English isn't my first language but I learned it just fine; trying to learn French after that feels like bashing my head against the wall. This is somewhat irrelevant, but I've heard that some French speakers who speak some English like to pretend they don't speak it when you talk to them. Why do you have to make life difficult for everyone, I'm not going to make fun of you for speaking English poorly. That's not even mentioning how metropolitan French has a superiority complex over other variations of French, all neutral observers will agree that they are equally shit. Also I've heard that some French speakers tend to discriminate against people who speak a local dialect of French, as if one version of a language is better than all others. Sure, the same thing happens with English, but at least the English language doesn't suck.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
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This is the Vegan Police

twitchquotes: (β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ) This is the Vegan Police. We have reason to suspect the food you just ate was not entirely Vegan. Please prepare a stool sample promptly. (β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ)
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Domo Kun

─────────▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄───────── ───────▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄─────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„ β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–„β–€β–’β– β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β– β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€ β”€β”€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–„β–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–β–„β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–„β–€β–€β–„β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ───────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀───────
ascii art
September 2021

Only way I can feel safe

twitchquotes: When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Classic

NA WHY SO QUIET?

twitchquotes: LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL
twitch chat
November 2018

EU vs NA

Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. β€œAre you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. β€œSoon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltβ€”the alternation feature brokenβ€”on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a timeβ€”hours?β€”you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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