[Copypasta] why are you gay

"why are you gay" i dont know.. one day i woke up and saw a mans ass, then i bit my lip and then he turned around and bit his lip too. then we fucked all night and forgot to say no homo, but he was fine with it. since then we've been fucking everyday, he's really vocal in bed and i love having fun with him ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ so thats why im gay. im pretty sure his name is [ur dads name here] he's really good in bed.
May 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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Slap Chop commercial script

Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! Youโ€™re going to be in a great mood all day, because youโ€™re going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look hereโ€™s a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you donโ€™t have to switch any blades. Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- thatโ€™s why you donโ€™t have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza. Youโ€™re going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now youโ€™re going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this youโ€™re going to have an exciting life now. Look hereโ€™s a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and youโ€™re going to love this. You donโ€™t have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go. Youโ€™re going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isnโ€™t that beautiful on your ice cream.
December 2020

I was worried all the copium mines had run dry

twitchquotes: I was worried all the copium mines had run dry, that our reckless over-mining of such a precious resource had rendered it lost to time. But here comes our lord and savior [insert streamer here], who has managed to make this once limited resource renewable. Thank you sir. Our children will build statues to honor your ingenuity.
twitch chat
October 2021

If SINATRAA and my girl both drowning

twitchquotes: if SINATRAA๐Ÿ‘ฝand my girl๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿ˜ both drowning ๐Ÿ˜ฑ ๐Ÿ‘‹ and I can only save one๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ฌCatch me at the enemy spawn door๐Ÿšช๐Ÿ”ด with my boy on tracer ๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿ•ฐ
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Seagull

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ—โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
December 2015
Kripp

Mayor of Canadaland

twitchquotes: แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜, แด›สœษชs ษชs แด›สœแด‡ แดแด€สแดส€ แดา“ แด„แด€ษดแด€แด…แด€สŸแด€ษดแด…. แดกแด‡ ษดแด‡แด‡แด… สแดแดœ สœแดแดแด‡ แดส sแดษด, แด‡แด แด‡ส€ sษชษดแด„แด‡ สแดแดœ สŸแด‡า“แด› แดœs แดแดœส€ sแด€สŸแด› แดษชษดแด‡s สœแด€แด แด‡ ส™แด‡แด‡ษด ส€แดœษดษดษชษดษข แด…ส€ส. ษดแด แดษดแด‡ ษชs แด˜ส€แดแด ษชแด…ษชษดษข แด›สœแด‡sแด‡ แด˜แดแดส€ สœแด€ส€แด…-แดกแดส€แด‹ษชษดษข แด˜แด‡แดแด˜สŸแด‡ แดกษชแด›สœ แด›สœแด‡ แด›แด€ส™สŸแด‡ sแด€สŸแด› แด›สœแด‡ส แด…แด‡sแด‡ส€แด แด‡ า“แดส€ แด›สœแด‡ษชส€ แด…แด€ษชสŸส แดแด‡แด€สŸs. แดกแด‡ ษดแด‡แด‡แด… สแดแดœ แดแด„แด›แด€แด ษชแด€ษด.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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