"why are you gay"
i dont know.. one day i woke up and saw a mans ass, then i bit my lip and then he turned around and bit his lip too. then we fucked all night and forgot to say no homo, but he was fine with it. since then we've been fucking everyday, he's really vocal in bed and i love having fun with him πππ so thats why im gay. im pretty sure his name is [ur dads name here] he's really good in bed.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
It can never be opposite day
It can never be opposite day. When ever you say "HEY IT'S OPPOSITE DAY!" the opposite would apply therefor it would not be opposite day. Also if you say "IT'S NOT OPPOSITE DAY!" the affect is not applied.
Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure
twitchquotes:
Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
Among Us concerned father
Hello everyone, concerned father here. Recently my 7 year old son discovered the video game βAmong Usβ after playing it on his computer. While i didnβt mind at first, it soon began to affect his character. Within a week, he had been screaming 'susβ in his sleep. When asked to do his homework, he called me a stupid father and said βkickedβ. His grades have been dropping heavily since that day and whenever i refuse to give him my credit card for cosmetics he threatens me saying heβll βejectβ me. Yesterday I entered his room to witness him listening to extremely loud rave 'Among Dripβ, he put a bunch of pillows in his shirt to make himself look big and now calls himself a βcrewmateβ. He refuses to go to bible study unless we use βventβ to get there. I donβt know what that is but he refuses to take any form of transportation except that. Please I am so concerned, what do I do?
Among Us / Amogus
Tiffany's chandelier
twitchquotes:
I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
GME to the moon
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