[Copypasta] Logan Paul Apology but I replace "apologize" with "cum"

I've made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement and I don't expect to be forgiven. I'm simply here to cum. So what we came across that day on the woods was obviously unplanned and the reactions you saw on tape were raw, they were unfiltered. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down, and stopped recording what we were going through. There's a lot of things I should have done differently, but I didn't, and for that from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I want to cum to the internet, I want to cum to anyone who's seen the video, I want to cum to anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness, or depression, or suicide. But, most importantly, I want to cum to the victim and his family. For, my fans, who are defending my actions, please don't, they do not deserve to be defended. The goal of my content is always to entertain, to push the boundaries, to be all inclusive and in the world I live in I share almost everything I do. The intent is never to be heartless, cruel, or malicious. Like I said, I made a huge mistake, I don't expect to be forgiven, I'm just here to cum. I'm ashamed of myself. I'm disappointed in myself, and I promise to be better. I will be better, thank you.
May 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Tuck me

twitchquotes: Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° γ€€ γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€tuck me γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€ γ€€γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° γ€€ γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ γ€€ Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Why Harry Potter should have carried a 1911

Ok, this has been driving me crazy for seven movies now, and I know you're going to roll your eyes, but hear me out: Harry Potter should have carried a 1911. Here's why: Think about how quickly the entire WWWIII (Wizarding-World War III) would have ended if all of the good guys had simply armed up with good ol' American hot lead. Basilisk? Let's see how tough it is when you shoot it with a .470 Nitro Express. Worried about its Medusa-gaze? Wear night vision goggles. The image is light-amplified and re-transmitted to your eyes. You aren't looking at it--you're looking at a picture of it. Imagine how epic the first movie would be if Harry had put a breeching charge on the bathroom wall, flash-banged the hole, and then went in wearing NVGs and a Kevlar-weave stab-vest, carrying a SPAS-12. And have you noticed that only Europe seems to a problem with Deatheaters? Maybe it's because Americans have spent the last 200 years shooting deer, playing GTA: Vice City, and keeping an eye out for black helicopters over their compounds. Meanwhile, Brits have been cutting their steaks with spoons. Remember: gun-control means that Voldemort wins. God made wizards and God made muggles, but Samuel Colt made them equal. Now I know what you're going to say: "But a wizard could just disarm someone with a gun!" Yeah, well they can also disarm someone with a wand (as they do many times throughout the books/movies). But which is faster: saying a spell or pulling a trigger? Avada Kedavra, meet Avtomat Kalashnikova. Imagine Harry out in the woods, wearing his invisibility cloak, carrying a .50bmg Barrett, turning Deatheaters into pink mist, scratching a lightning bolt into his rifle stock for each kill. I don't think Madam Pomfrey has any spells that can scrape your brains off of the trees and put you back together after something like that. Voldemort's wand may be 13.5 inches with a Phoenix-feather core, but Harry's would be 0.50 inches with a tungsten core. Let's see Voldy wave his at 3,000 feet per second. Better hope you have some Essence of Dittany for that sucking chest wound. I can see it now...Voldemort roaring with evil laughter and boasting to Harry that he can't be killed, since he is protected by seven Horcruxes, only to have Harry give a crooked grin, flick his cigarette butt away, and deliver what would easily be the best one-liner in the entire series: "Well then I guess it's a good thing my 1911 holds 7+1." And that is why Harry Potter should have carried a 1911.
August 2021

Florida Mayhem McDonald's

twitchquotes: Guys, the color scheme of McDonald's consists of red, yellow, and white. It does not include blac k like Florida Mayhem. Stop spamming about how they are McDonald's already. It's untrue and unfunny.
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Jared we need to talk, are you boosted?

twitchquotes: "Jared we need to talk" said QT sitting down at the table. "We think you have a problem" said Dom. " are you boosted?" they asked in unison. Jared began to break down and cry as he looked at his D3 account. "I dont think I'll ever get to play with you guys again unless I do" said Jared. "Quit being a *** pussy" said Dom and QT as Jared eyed the glock on the table next to them.
twitch chat
April 2016
imaqtpie

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

Kripp wins Best Actor

twitchquotes: It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. β€œBoy,” he says, β€œwe got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!” The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. β€œWow!” says Hanks. β€œI don’t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his β€˜Unsponsored’ Hero Academy 2β„’ Stream!”
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing