Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. Itโs not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. Itโs a ๐ณ๏ธโ๐๐ป legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflationโฆ He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to beโฆ transitory. He became so powerfulโฆ the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
The real power of compounding
Remember, if you lose 10% a day over several days youโre actually losing less money as time passes. This is what people mean when they talk about the power of compounding
WallStreetBets
Bullish market makes me hard
When the stocks ๐๐ go up ๐๐ธ, my dick goes too ๐โฌ๏ธ๐ณ. Bullish ๐ market ๐ฌ makes me hard ๐ฆด๐ฆ. All the countries ๐ณ๏ธ๐ด๐ดโโ ๏ธ๐๐ฉ๐ณ๏ธโ๐๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ๐บ๐ณ try to recover ๐ from corona ๐ฆ so the money ๐ฐ๐ต๐ธ flows ๐ฌ into my pocket ๐ณ. Soon ๐ there will be a crash ๐๐ญ๐ฅบ๐ and the bears ๐ป will crawl ๐ผ out of their holes ๐ณ. Then they cut off my greedy dick โ๏ธ๐๐ฉธ if I donโt โ eat โem out ๐
๐ธ. I must turn into a bear ๐โก๏ธ๐ป and make ๐ค๐ผ more money ๐ฐ๐ต๐ธ and eat some honey ๐ป๐ฏ. When Iโm done โ
Iโll throw a party ๐๐ท๐พ and eat your ass ๐
๐.
Emoji Pasta
WallStreetBets
Unrealized losses
She runs her hand through your thinning hair and laughs. โWhat?โ you ask absentmindedly. Youโre looking at Futures, and youโre surprised to see them red.
โI want you to play with me.โ She says it playfully, but the single ounce of you that isnโt totally aloof realizes she said this in earnest. And so you do. You throw your phone, and you pin her to the sofa, then the ground. You both roll about, wrestling, like lion cubs. Kissing, lightly biting. Sometime later, you both stop, breathing hard. She grabs an open bottle of red wine, and you pass it back and forth. Eventually she says, โI want to do that more.โ
But youโve already found your phone again to check Futures. Still red. โUh huh,โ you say, distracted. She stares at you for a long moment, but you donโt realize it. Silently, she gets up and goes to bed, and you donโt say a word because you donโt notice.
She hasnโt left you yet, but she will soon.
Unrealized losses.
WallStreetBets
Hopefully the FBI can find Jack Ma
FBI set up a tip line for people to send in videos and pictures of the people who stormed the capitol yesterday... Iโve been sending them pictures of Jack Ma. Hopefully they can find him.
WallStreetBets
Buying calls on Gamestop
I can't believe that after fifteen years of trading, my best trade of all time is going to be buying calls on fucking Gamestop.