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Are you Reynad's dad?

twitchquotes: I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

NO POMEGRANATES

Teacher: NO POMEGRANATES!!! NO NO NO NO NO POMEGRANATES!!! NO!!! I DONT WANT THEM ANYWHERE NEAR HERE, AM I CLEAR!!! Say the role again, NO POMEGRANATES!!!, say it. Sarcastic Kids: No pomegranates...
April 2021
I used to be a real ad

Do you think this will affect my late game Vayne?

twitchquotes: Tensei, I have been playing league competitive for many years now, but at the most recent event I drank too much with Meteos. I woke up the next day in his bed with my fingers smelling a bit rank. Do you think this will affect my late game Vayne(s)?
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

League of Legends

Remittance-based Number Generation

twitchquotes: R-N-G Remittance-based Number Generation, was a phrased developed by Blizzard in 2013 Hearthstone Beta(2014 official release). The phrase describes Blizzard's sentiment off *** YOU PAY US MORE MONIES RIGHT *** NOW. If the player does not pay $4.50 average per week, ugly loss accruing algorithms are enabled.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

Yuletide tunes in your playlist

twitchquotes: (╭ರ_•́)\c[] Dear Mr. Andrey Yanyuk, may I humbly suggest the implementation of Yuletide tunes in your playlist for the day good sir? (╭ರ_•́)\c[]
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad
I used to be a real ad

Sandown being investigated by the FBI

twitchquotes: ༼▀ل͜▀༽ The FBI is currently investigating a possible DDOS attack against Kripparian. It is believed that Sandown masterminded this attack against Kripparian's stream, in order to steal his viewers and promote his own streaming career. It is estimated that Kripparian has lost tens of millions of dollars in the DDOS attack, which Sandown allegedly had executed. Sandown refused to comment on the event when reporters swarmed his house, but he later released a brief statement denying the allegation. Kripparian spoke out later that night stating that he intends to sue Sandown if it is proven that he did commit this cyber crime. ༼▀ل͜▀༽
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

without throwing your cat across the room

twitchquotes: Hello this is Twitch staff. Unfortunately we have been notified that you have now reached 24 hours of stream time without throwing your cat across the room. As stated in our TOS, we require that all streamers must throw at least one pet a distance of 3 metres on camera in order to maintain the ability to stream. Failure to do so will result in your stream being disabled permanently. We will now unfortunately have to terminate your account. Thank you for your cooperation.
twitch chat
November 2019

Hi Kripp, it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater. I heard you are trying to play other games when we need you here at Skyrim to clean up the dragons. Quit what you are doing right now and come join me as the new Whiterun Thane. My axe is ready as your reward.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Bible Passages

twitchquotes: Hey Imaqtpie, don't get my wrong buddy I love all of these funny meme games during queue but I have a new idea. I would love us all to read some bible passages during queue times! Thanks and god bless!
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

Kripp's handicapped half-cousin from Romania, Kripple

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is you handicapped half-cousin from Romania, Kripple. I need you help for my medical bill. I owe Doctor $5,000 and he only accept 5 dollar bill. Plz help. If I don't pay he take my good leg. Sincerlirino, Kripple J. Morospam
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

My eyes are open

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ノ MY EYES, ARE OPEN ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ノ
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Michael Santana It's your Mom Here!

twitchquotes: Michael Santana It's your Mom Here!!! Someone just told me you didnt say Thank you... You will change your manners!!! REMEMBER i brought you into this world i can take you out of it!!!
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

I'm getting mighty SPOOKED over here

twitchquotes: STOP POSTING SKELETONS im getting mighty SPOOKED over here
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Failed as a pepperino pizza

twitchquotes: Mʏ ʙᴏʏ, Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ ᴅɪᴅᴅʟᴇʀɪɴᴏ, ᴡʜʏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴏ ᴏᴜᴛ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴀɴᴅ sᴜᴄᴋ ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʀᴏᴍᴀɴɪᴀɴ ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ?" ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ sᴀʏ ɪs, "Rɪᴘ ɪɴ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪ" ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀᴘᴘᴀғᴀʀʀɪᴀɴ ɢᴏ, "ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪs ɴᴇᴡғᴀɴɢʟᴇᴅ ᴀᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀɴ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴘᴇᴀᴋ, ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ғᴀɪʟᴇᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ғᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

You used ect instead of etc

Hello! You have made the mistake of writing "ect" instead of "etc." "Ect" is a common misspelling of "etc," an abbreviated form of the Latin phrase "et cetera." Other abbreviated forms are etc., &c., &c, and et cet. The Latin translates as "et" to "and" + "cetera" to "the rest;" a literal translation to "and the rest" is the easiest way to remember how to use the phrase.
May 2022

I Am Very Smart

I used to be a real ad

Kripp and his tiny peckerwood

twitchquotes: Omg Kripp... I remember seeing you in the hallways during school. I remember seeing your zipper down and I kept eyeing you tiny peckerwood. You always had the cutest grin. Please call me (205-069-1337) and find me. I will always love you. ~Eddy Pepperino (not wearing any panties atm).
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

༼ つ _ ༽つGreetings twitch chat

twitchquotes: ༼ つ _ ༽つGreetings twitch chat, at midnight i will celebrate halloween by killing people who didn't Copy pastarino this message. Do it now or you will be dead at 00:00. Copy pastarino NOW or Rip in peperoni's.༼ つ _ ༽つ
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Hurr Durr Durr Pizza

twitchquotes: ᕕOpieOPᕗ Hello Kripp, Cybrix here. Just wanted to say: ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ᕕOpieOPᕗ
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

Floating in a pool of casualness

twitchquotes: Fᴏʀᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ʀᴏᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ ʀᴀɴᴋs.. Fʟᴏᴀᴛɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴘᴏᴏʟ ᴏғ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟɴᴇss.. Fᴀᴄɪɴɢ ᴇɴᴅʟᴇss sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍs ᴏғ ɴᴏᴏʙs.. Wʜᴏ ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴄᴀʀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴡɪɴ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime!

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ Dongers in the morning, dongers in the evening, dongers at suppertime. If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime! ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing