Popular Copypastas

without throwing your cat across the room

twitchquotes: Hello this is Twitch staff. Unfortunately we have been notified that you have now reached 24 hours of stream time without throwing your cat across the room. As stated in our TOS, we require that all streamers must throw at least one pet a distance of 3 metres on camera in order to maintain the ability to stream. Failure to do so will result in your stream being disabled permanently. We will now unfortunately have to terminate your account. Thank you for your cooperation.

twitch chat

November 2019

Hi Kripp, it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater. I heard you are trying to play other games when we need you here at Skyrim to clean up the dragons. Quit what you are doing right now and come join me as the new Whiterun Thane. My axe is ready as your reward.

twitch chat

January 2015

Kripp

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Kill cummand face, huntard hardest deck in the game

twitchquotes: ｒｅｙｎａｄｉｓｄｅｅｐｉｎｔｈｏｕｇｈｔ．＇ｄｏｉｐｌａｙｍｙｏｖｅｒｐｏｗｅｒｅｄｄｏｇｃａｒｄｎｏｗｏｒｌａｔｅｒ？＇．ｈｅｍａｋｅｓｔｈｅｍｉｓｐｌａｙｂｕｔｉｔｄｏｅｓｎ＇ｔｍａｔｔｅｒ．ｈｅｋｉｌｌｃｕｍｍａｎｄｓｔｈｅｆａｃｅ．ｈａｒｄｅｓｔｄｅｃｋｉｎｔｈｅｇａｍｅ．

twitch chat

April 2014

Reynad

WSB Buy $COCK

Buy $COCK. I heard WSB is buying $COCK and $COCK IS THE NEXT BIG THING. $COCK IS RISING TODAY. Do your own DD on $COCK and let me know how much you like $COCK. 💎✊ your 🚀🚀🚀 $COCK to the 🌑

February 2021

WallStreetBets

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.

August 2021

What happened to this ad? :(

Wanna buy some dongers?

twitchquotes: ༼ຈل͜├┬┴┬┴ Psst… Moderator, you wanna buy some dongers?

twitch chat

January 2019

Don't just feel casual look casual!

twitchquotes: COMING SOON!! Casual wear by Kripparian! Don't just feel casual look casual! Just pay the low low price of 4.99$ a month. And you took can look and act like a casual! Order now and get a free brofist!

twitch chat

November 2014

Kripp

Little Donger and the BDC

twitchquotes: Qtpie I need help. I have a little donger so I am unable to join the BDC. Please send help and advice otherwise I will forever be a part of the small donger squad. Promote me from the SDS to the BDC please it is all I have ever wanted.

twitch chat

July 2014

imaqtpie

Mom, twitch chat is not a documentary on Nazis!

twitchquotes: ＭｙｍｏｍｊｕｓｔｗａｌｋｅｄｉｎｔｏｍｙｒｏｏｍａｎｄａｓｋｅｄｗｈｙＩｗａｓｗａｔｃｈｉｎｇａｄｏｃｕｍｅｎｔａｒｙｏｎＨｉｔｌｅｒｓｔｏｐｏｆｆｉｃｅｒｓ．Ｉｔｏｌｄｈｅｒ "Ｎｏｍｏｍｉｔ＇ｓｊｕｓｔｔｗｉｔｃｈｃｈａｔｍｏｄｓ" ＳｈｅｃａｌｌｅｄｍｅａＪｅｗｈａｔｅｒａｎｄｂｕｒｎｅｄａＳｗａｓｔｉｋａｉｎｔｏｍｙｆｏｒｅｈｅａｄ．

twitch chat

August 2014

Trump

Daddy, where do dongers come from?

twitchquotes: (=◕ل͜◕=) Daddy, where do dongers come from? (=◕ل͜◕=) ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉYou see, little dong, when a donger and a dongerina dong together, the dong of the donger releases thousands of small dongs, which dongs the dongerina. 9 dongs later, the dongerina goes through a dong process, which finally raises a donger. ヽ( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)ﾉ

twitch chat

July 2014

Kripp

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Everytiem kripp topdeck

twitchquotes: Everytiem kripp topdick, i well met all over myself Kreygasm

twitch chat

July 2014

Kripp

Mill druid is a great example of the theory of relativity

twitchquotes: Mill druid is a great example of the theory of relativity. The closer you get to the mill horizon the more time expands, eventually becoming infinite. ResidentSleeper

twitch chat

January 2015

Kripp

Leifman the Salt King can save the world

twitchquotes: A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Salt king, a moderator named Leifman. And although his moderating skills are great, he still has a lot to learn before he's ready to save any chat. But I believe Leifman can save the world.

twitch chat

July 2014

Kripp

We wish you a Merry Krippmas

twitchquotes: ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas and a Salty New Year. Good top-deckings to you, whereever you are, Good top-deckings for Krippmas, and a Salty New Year. ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ

twitch chat

December 2014

Kripp

Are you Reynad's dad?

twitchquotes: I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.

twitch chat

January 2015

Reynad

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

NO POMEGRANATES

Teacher: NO POMEGRANATES!!! NO NO NO NO NO POMEGRANATES!!! NO!!! I DONT WANT THEM ANYWHERE NEAR HERE, AM I CLEAR!!! Say the role again, NO POMEGRANATES!!!, say it. Sarcastic Kids: No pomegranates...

April 2021

I am Pakistan

twitchquotes: ´ellu oddone. i am pakistan. i spek not so very best englend sorry. i like watch you pley. you bestest jungler in laegue of legend. i want become yuo pls tech me to pley . i want become bester pleyer pls oddone tech me

twitch chat

July 2014

TheOddOne

Kripp's sonnerino

twitchquotes: Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ɪᴛ's ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴏɴɴᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ғᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ, ᴄᴏɴᴄᴇɪᴠᴇᴅ ɪɴ Gʀᴇᴇᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ's ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜᴇᴅ. Yᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴀᴄᴛᴇᴅ ᴀ ʜɪɢʜʟʏ ʟᴇɢᴀʟ ғᴏʀᴍ ᴏғ ᴀɪᴅs ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴏᴏɴ ɪɴғᴇᴄᴛ ᴇᴀʀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ. Tʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴜʀᴇ ɪs ᴀ ᴘʜᴇʀᴏᴍᴏɴᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛᴇᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴏɴʟʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ. Pᴀᴘᴀ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ! Pʟs ɴᴏ ғᴇᴛᴛᴜᴄᴄɪɴᴏ ᴀʟғᴀ ʀᴏᴍᴇᴏ

twitch chat

March 2014

Kripp

2 games 1 stream

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Twitch Staff. We have noticed that you are trying to become a hardcore player again, since you broke the laws of physics and play 2 games on 1 stream, when the laws of physics clearly says: "How can there be 2 games, when only 1 channel?". We hope that you will stop this, and become a casual player again. Please don't repost this. Thank you.

twitch chat

July 2014

Kripp

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Sandown being investigated by the FBI

twitchquotes: ༼▀ل͜▀༽ The FBI is currently investigating a possible DDOS attack against Kripparian. It is believed that Sandown masterminded this attack against Kripparian's stream, in order to steal his viewers and promote his own streaming career. It is estimated that Kripparian has lost tens of millions of dollars in the DDOS attack, which Sandown allegedly had executed. Sandown refused to comment on the event when reporters swarmed his house, but he later released a brief statement denying the allegation. Kripparian spoke out later that night stating that he intends to sue Sandown if it is proven that he did commit this cyber crime. ༼▀ل͜▀༽

twitch chat

January 2015

Kripp

without throwing your cat across the room

Hi Kripp, it's Jarl Balgruuf the Greater

Kill cummand face, huntard hardest deck in the game

WSB Buy $COCK

WallStreetBets

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

Wanna buy some dongers?

Don't just feel casual look casual!

Little Donger and the BDC

Mom, twitch chat is not a documentary on Nazis!

Daddy, where do dongers come from?

Everytiem kripp topdeck

Mill druid is a great example of the theory of relativity

Leifman the Salt King can save the world

We wish you a Merry Krippmas

Are you Reynad's dad?

NO POMEGRANATES

I am Pakistan

Kripp's sonnerino

2 games 1 stream

Sandown being investigated by the FBI

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