I used to be a real ad
Sort by:

This is Catarrian's mother

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian, this is the Catarrian's mother. I am writing to in human words because the Catarrian feels he has been mistreated. He tells me "meow" which means that he feels you are not giving him enough stream time. And he also said "Nyaa," which means you better pet the Catarrian
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Shalom my fellow Twitchlings

twitchquotes: Shalom my fellow Twitchlings. My name is Herschel Goldstein, I hail from the ancient land of Israel. In this world there are two superior races: the valiant Japanese and the God-fearing Jews. When I met the great Kripp at Blizzcon 2013, he gave me a piece of advice that I will never forget: "Pentru a da oul omului, îl hrănești pentru o zi. Om învățat de ouă, îl va hrăni pentru o viață întreagă." Translated into foreign devil talk: I am coming Yankee scum. Get on board or get out of the way."
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Your kids and your brofisting

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian, Bobby Smith's mother here. I noticed more blood in Bobby's underwear doing his laundry this week. You kids and your brofisting!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Kelly Loeffler after Georgia senate election

Kelly Loeffler I know you're at home right now feeling a little sad. And now you're in bed browsing WSB looking for hot stock tips with maybe a few laughs. But just know this: I will have sex with you. DM me.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

I was worried all the copium mines had run dry

twitchquotes: I was worried all the copium mines had run dry, that our reckless over-mining of such a precious resource had rendered it lost to time. But here comes our lord and savior [insert streamer here], who has managed to make this once limited resource renewable. Thank you sir. Our children will build statues to honor your ingenuity.
twitch chat
October 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Frodan, be nicer to Kripp

twitchquotes: "Frodan, be nicer to Kripp," Reynad says in his office at Tempo Storm HQ. "I was just having a laugh," replies Frodan. "I know, but he's a casual and sensitive. Apologize to him. I'm inviting him over to 'cast' a 'tournament' and want him in a good mood," Reynad winks. Frodan bows and says, "Yes master."
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

Hearthstone

Will this pay for singing in mumble

twitchquotes: [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲] Leifman will this pay for singing in mumble? [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲]
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Based

"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
March 2021

Hunters are compelled by a mysterious force to attack face

twitchquotes: After months of careful and thorough research, I have discovered that Hunters, quite literally, do NOT have the capacity to trade minions. They are physically unable to attack an opponents minion with one of theirs. They a compelled by some mysterious force to mindlessly attack the face of their opponent.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

Yearly dongers supply

twitchquotes: ヽ ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Did you know: Most dongers—78 percent of the yearly dongers supply—is made into fedoras. Other industries, mostly electronics, medical, and dental, require about 12 percent. The remaining 10 percent of the yearly dongers supply is used in financial transactions. ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Remittance-based Number Generation

twitchquotes: R-N-G Remittance-based Number Generation, was a phrased developed by Blizzard in 2013 Hearthstone Beta(2014 official release). The phrase describes Blizzard's sentiment off *** YOU PAY US MORE MONIES RIGHT *** NOW. If the player does not pay $4.50 average per week, ugly loss accruing algorithms are enabled.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

Floating in a pool of casualness

twitchquotes: Fᴏʀᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ʀᴏᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ ʀᴀɴᴋs.. Fʟᴏᴀᴛɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴘᴏᴏʟ ᴏғ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟɴᴇss.. Fᴀᴄɪɴɢ ᴇɴᴅʟᴇss sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍs ᴏғ ɴᴏᴏʙs.. Wʜᴏ ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴄᴀʀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴡɪɴ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime!

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ Dongers in the morning, dongers in the evening, dongers at suppertime. If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime! ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hello Mr. Morosan! This is the salt truck driver

twitchquotes: ༼ ͠• ل͜ • ༽ ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴍʀ. ᴍᴏʀᴏsᴀɴ! ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴀʟᴛ-ᴛʀᴜᴄᴋ-ᴅʀɪᴠᴇʀ. ɪ'ᴍ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀ ᴏꜰ 69 ᴛᴏɴs ᴏꜰ ᴩᴜʀᴇ sᴀʟᴛ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴀᴍᴏᴜs sᴀʟᴛᴍɪɴᴇ "üʙᴇʀᴋäᴋᴇɴᴋᴏᴛᴢɴ" ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀʟᴩs. ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ'ᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀ ᴍᴏʀᴇ sᴀʟᴛ, ʟᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ! ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ sɪʀ! ༼ ͠• ل͜ • ༽
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

10 years since kolento strim

twitchquotes: 10 years since kolento strim.i walk through the empty streets trying to think of something else but my path always leads to the stream. i stare at the screen for hours and try to summon the lord. i watch other asian girls streaming but it is no good. i flame trump in his channel and try to resist the nazi mods but it is all meaningless. the end is near.i then usually watch some old kolento vods and cry myself to sleep.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kolento
I used to be a real ad

Any advice, Dad?

twitchquotes: Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Tʏʀᴏɴᴇ, ᴜʀ sᴏɴ. Mʏ ᴍᴏᴍ, Lᴀǫᴜɪsʜᴀ, ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴍᴇ. I ᴊᴜsᴛ ɢᴏᴛ ᴋɪᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ Cᴀɴᴀᴅɪᴀɴ ᴇʟᴇᴍᴇɴᴛᴀʀʏ sᴄʜᴏᴏʟ ғᴏʀ sᴀʏɪɴɢ "F*ᴄᴋ" ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴜ. Oʀ ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs ғᴏʀ ʏᴇʟʟɪɴɢ "RIP" ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ᴘᴜɴᴄʜɪɴɢ ᴀ ᴋɪᴅ...ᴀɴʏ ᴀᴅᴠɪᴄᴇ, Dᴀᴅ?
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Me and you know the real struggle

twitchquotes: Reynaldo, I have consistently around ten viewers, and its so annoying whenever I stream because I constantly get sniped, these plebs wouldn't understand, me and you know the real struggle. I have an 100% win rate when im not streaming and only a 5% when I am, just like you.
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

It's seen as a bit of skillfull fun

twitchquotes: When Kripp gets a good topdeck, its seen as a bit of skillful fun. BUT when his opponent topdecks precisely the only card that can beat him, and there's nothing Kripp can do, together with a CRAZY deck that his deck can't win against, hes called lucky?
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Knight of Negativitironi

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ ◉_◔༽凸 I am the knight of Negativitironi. Stand back foul positivitironi! <:::::[]=¤༼ ◉_◔༽凸
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Ingesting too much salt can cause casualness

twitchquotes: Studies show that ingesting too much salt can kill healthy bacteria in your digestive track, this can cause side-effects ranging from a weak immune system, acid reflex, and being a casual...
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing