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Kripp drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges

twitchquotes: Kripp, its Stavros the Fruit Seller from the bazaar. I'm sorry to tell you but you've drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges. Because of the rioting on the streets we advise you to hide any OJ supply you might have left. We can now only sell you Olive Juice and the odd jar of Tzatziki. Please no gyro ouzo
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Every game is equally pointless

twitchquotes: Every game is equally pointless. You can't put this *** on a resume or anything, so what does it matter if you play online chess or LoL? Unless you're a professional and making mad cash off the game, it doesn't matter what you play.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

So last weekend I was walking in WalMart and saw Trump

twitchquotes: So last weekend I was walking in WalMart and saw Trump... which was pretty cool. I was wondering why he was in the "woman's hygeine" section of the store.... He caught on to what I was thinking and held up some tampons. "For my girlfriend", he said, giggling nervously. But he doesn't have a GF. I think they were for HIM!
twitch chat
October 2014
Trump

I tried to go help

Damn saw this one guy getting beat up by 2 other dudes today so I tried to go help, didn’t stand a chance against the 3 of us.
March 2021

When Tim Hortons... all becoming Canada

twitchquotes: when tim hortons, my hand automatically go to the maple glazed. i dip the doughnuterinos and feel i have sex with the hockey, all becoming canada eh?  sorry
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(

Kripparrian... this Bro Fist is for you

twitchquotes: As he raises his "Bro Fist" gently against his cam, I raise my donger against my cam. I feel how for that moment, Kripparrian and I become one. My donger starts to shake, and I close my eyes, letting out a small moan as our "Bro Fists" e-touches. "Kripparrian.. this Bro Fist is for you" I whisper to myself. Kreygasm
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

We can't blame market

To be fair "but I poop from there" wasn't an explicit "no". We can't blame market for doing what it did.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

I want to have a decent chat experience Kappa

twitchquotes: Listen I just want to be in Kripp chat and have a decent experience I just want to be able to discuss the game and better myself as a person like a good chat would let me do can we all just calm down please no copy pasterino jalepeno linguini fettucinni alfredo
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

Based

"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
March 2021

Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house

twitchquotes: Michael, this is Dumbledore, Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house and killed Scarra. The legend says the one that carrys the mark of the donger on his forehead is destined to stop the dark lord. Please Michael avenge Scarra!
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
I used to be a real ad

Monte Cristo's statement

twitchquotes: hello my fellow kappas my name is Kappastankapsterinocunnio, you could also call me monte cristo. voyboy is very gud in mid beddar than link and mid pack and mediorcre. i learn to spell from russian infantry 586. i hate regi cuz he monkey king and spews garbage and lies to all of my wrong doings. I jack off with clg hat in korea instead of coache mai team . voyboy is a sweet hart i wish we *** someteim i luv him. he *** my team in playoffs and i leik it all the time. enuff about voyboy more about kappa town. kappaccino koccino frappatino pls no copy pastarinocappaciino cocinai luv u all pjsaltyarion
twitch chat
August 2014
onGamers

Kripp this is Pornhub LLC

twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I dropped my deck of playing cards

twitchquotes: ᴬ♥ ⁴♣ ³♥ ⁴♥ ¹⁰♣ ᴶ♠ ⁶♠ ᑫ♥ ⁸♦ ⁹♦ ⁴♠ ⁵♥ ᴷ♠ ⁵♣ ⁵♦ ²♦ ⁵♠ ᑫ♠ ³♠ ⁶♥ ▼ ⁶♣ ¹⁰♥ ⁶♦ I dropped my deck of playing cards ⁷♥ ᴬ♠ ⁷♣ ³♦ ᴷ♣ ⁷♦ ²♠ ⁷♠ ⁸♥ ²♣ ᴷ♥ ⁸♣ ⁴♦ ¹⁰♦ ⁸♠ ⁹♥ ᴬ♣ ⁹♣ ³♣ ⁹♠ ¹⁰♥ ¹⁰♦ ¹⁰♠ ᴶ♥ ᴬ♦ ²♥ ᴶ♣ ᴶ♦ ᑫ♣ ᑫ♦ ᴷ♦ ᴷ♠
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Sell out

twitchquotes: Now You're somebody that used to code
twitch chat
September 2014
Notch

Evolution is sorcery made up by communists

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Pie, concerned Christian parent here, my child came asking for 4.99$ because he said he wanted to join the BDC, whatever that is. Please stop filling my kid's head with lies... I already had to tell him that Evolution is sorcery made up by communists
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

I need help typing

twitchquotes: i need help typing, im new to the americas and i dont know how to english very well can someone help me? pleasew stop spamming chat so i can learn please....without this i wont pass my english class iand ill get deported please...
twitch chat
November 2014
TidesOfTime

Upside-dong

twitchquotes: ( ͜o ͡ʖ ͜o) im upside-dong ( ͜o ͡ʖ ͜o)
twitch chat
August 2014
MushIsGosu

Don't even try to compare Xqc to Forsen

twitchquotes: Don't even try to compare Xqcow to frozen. Xqcow is god, frozen is dog. Xqcow is smart, frozen is a wet shart. Xqcow makes Poggers plays, frozen is a glorified sleep aid. Xqcow is the juicer, frozen is a fruit. Capiche kiddo?
twitch chat
January 2022
Forsen

YAYO was first found in America in the year 1070

twitchquotes: Did You Know? YAYO was first found in America in the year 1070. The native Dongers sang it to please their God. One day they didn't sing YAYO, a NACHO TORPEDO destroyed their whole culture. Ripperino Dongerino, all you knew was YAYO..
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

CNN reports on Reynad in Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: ༼;´ ༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ ༽ Attention twitch chat. CNN is reporting popular Hearthstone streamer Andrey "REYNAD" Yanyuk attempted to hang himself after a disappointing weekend of tournaments. Luckily he ran out of rope before he could finish the cowardly act. ༼;´ ༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ ༽
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing