[Copypasta] Every 60 seconds in Murica, 60000 burgers are digested

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Eᴠᴇʀʏ 60 sᴇᴄᴏɴᴅs ɪɴ Mᴜʀɪᴄᴀ, 60,000 ʙᴜʀɢᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇ ᴅɪɢᴇsᴛᴇᴅ. Tᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴛʜɪs. Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ sᴘʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀᴅ. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Lower case is for the lower class

twitchquotes: ╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ノ LOWER CASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS ╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ノ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Bowling simulator: E-Bowler

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Kenneth Jizbombski, president of Viral Games, Inc. Recently sales of our most popular Bowling simulator "E-Bowler" have plummeted. Please help my small company by going out and getting E-Bowler any way that you can. I want E-Bowler to spread infecting people with it's incredible gameplay!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

My daughter was born with a hearing impairment

twitchquotes: My daughter was born with a hearing impairment than ultimately left her deaf shortly after birth. I have been working for years to pay for a new surgery that would allow her to hear again. Today was her 8th birthday and I managed to get her what she's always wanted for her birthday, the sense of hearing. I decided to let her listen in on what Daddy has been watching late at night and I turn on your stream and what do I hear? Silence. Now she's crying thinking she's deaf again, Nice job Kripp.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Classic

ATTENTION 2003 KIDS

twitchquotes: ❗️❗️❗️ATTENTION 2003 KIDS❗️❗️❗️!!! This 👇 is the last year of being a kid 😔👦👧! Because NEXT 👉YEAR! We gon be T33N4G3RS💁🙅💅!! PARTYING 🎉💃 DRINKING 🍻🍸🍹🍷 MAKING OUT AND SEX 👅💦😳 PERIODS 😩🍫 HEARTBREAKS 💔😪 MIDDLE SCHOOL SOPHOMORES (7TH GRADE)
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

Which Rogue card should I pick?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, I'm drafting a Rogue Arena and I'm 29 cards in. Should I pick Backstab (like you backstabbed Paparrian ) Betrayal (like you betrayed Paparrian ) or Vanish (like you vanished from Paparrian)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing