[Copypasta] Grand Dragon Jebodiah Pasterino

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, this is the Grand Dragon of the KKK, Jebodiah Pasterino. I see you're wearing one of our signature white hoods. We at the KKK do not associate with casuals such as yourself. Please remove the hood or we will take legal action.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC

twitchquotes: (sponsored message) WOW! I love the way this game looks. The graphics are great and the framerate is perfect! I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC and just moving over to mobile because this seems like the far superior product. Thank you Kripp for showing me this amazing new game.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

sellout

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

My son, why did you tap last?

twitchquotes: In Romanian village there is very little water. Papparian is thirsty and asks Kripparian to get some water for him from the water tap 2 miles away. Kripp decides to go to the store first. A few hours later Kripp brings Papparian his water, only to find Papparian has had a heat stroke. With his dying breath, Papparian asks "My son, why did you tap last?"
twitch chat
February 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Hey Kripp, it's me Tom from VeganHub Enterprises

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, it's me Tom from VeganHub Enterprises. I am sorry to say that your "VeganHub account" has expired and will need to be renewed. We suggest you try our "VeganHub Premium account" subscription. You can watch videos in 1080p ,60 fps, costs $12.99 and lasts you a year. You will also get exclusive access to videos such as, "Young Cob gets plowed", and , "Two lettuces, 1 knife". Since you are a loyal customer you will get a 10% discount this time.
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

Kappa is no longer working

twitchquotes: ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ATTENTION ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime ItsBoshyTime Someone has reported that the kappa emote is no longer working. Please type "Ka ppa" (no spaces) to confirm that it is indeed still working. Kappa
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
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