[Copypasta] You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is

twitchquotes: You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is, you go to the chat and scroll to hold it on the screen and indulge in its delights, as you continue to read you realize it does not contain anything funny or worth reading, and yet you highlight, copy it, paste it and send it.
twitch chat
November 2015
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

im not homophobic, just extremely racist

Hi i got suspended from reddit for the "what are you fucking gay" comment and just wanted to say that it was a joke and i thought that it could obviously be seen as one but i guess it wasnt. So yeah im not homophobic, just extremely racist, sorry if i made you feel bad, all my homies are allies of the lgbtq community. idek if you reported it maybe you got the joke but better safe than sorry and all that
July 2021

Slap Chop commercial script

Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! You’re going to be in a great mood all day, because you’re going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look here’s a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you don’t have to switch any blades. Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- that’s why you don’t have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza. You’re going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now you’re going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this you’re going to have an exciting life now. Look here’s a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and you’re going to love this. You don’t have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go. You’re going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isn’t that beautiful on your ice cream.
December 2020

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twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Please top switching the first 2 letters of words

twitchquotes: Dear chat, please top switching the first 2 letters of words; thereby forming a new or complety bogus word. For example in the two word sentence: "MIC MUTED". I and manny others have no idea what this means because you have switched the M with M and the M with the M. This confuses me to infinity. Thanks in advanced.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hey I'm a really nice guy

twitchquotes: Hey I'm a really nice guy. I've been playing csgo for quite a while and I'm feeling like boosting some girl gamers (preferably ones that look kinda good, I'd appreciate if you could send a picture before beginning.) and this because often when I talk to girls otherwise they don't take my csgo-skill in to consideration. Many girls through the years did friendzone me and I'm really tired of all douchebags taking the girls who deserve better.
twitch chat
September 2018

CSGO

Text-to-Speech Playing