[Copypasta] Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend

⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.

August 2021

Bender

───────────────────────────── ─────────────▐█▌───────────── ─────────────▐░▌───────────── ─────────────▐░▌───────────── ─────────────▐░▌───────────── ──────────▄▄▀░░░▀▄▄────────── ────────▄▀░░░░░░░░░▀▄──────── ──────▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▄────── ─────▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌───── ────▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌──── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▌─── ──▄███████████████████████▄── ─████▀────▀███████▀────▀███▄─ ─███▀───────█████────────███─ ─███───███───███───███───███─ ─███───▀▀▀───███───▀▀▀───███─ ─▀███▄─────▄█████▄─────▄███▀─ ──▀███████████████████████▀── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐░▄▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀▄░▌─── ───▐░█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█░▌─── ───▐░█──█──█──█──█──█──█░▌─── ───▐░█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█▀▀█░▌─── ───▐░▀▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄█▄▄▀░▌─── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ───▐░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▌─── ────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀────

ascii art

September 2021

I put my cursor over Kripp's and pretend we're holding hands

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) sometimes... when i have a bad day.... I put my cursor over Kripp's and pretend that we're holding hands (◕‿◕✿)

twitch chat

August 2015

Kripp

Classic

Hi Kripp, Suda the painting elephant here

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Suda the painting elephant here. I thought i could give you a few tips seeing how you appear to be painting at a calf level (that's a baby elephant btw.) Perhaps you could ask your trainer Raina to hand you different colored brushes to make the tree more vibrant? From one herbivore to another I've got to say this is a little depressing, but as long as you keep trying your best I have no doubt you will reach adult animal level painting skills. Happy Painting!

twitch chat

November 2018

Kripp

Cypher

twitchquotes: What do we have here? Ah, it’s the enemy, trying to hide their secrets among their little, feeble minds. But they fail to realize one thing. I am always watching, I know your every move, every step because nothing stays hidden from me. You can try to hide behind your corners, you can try to scurry away to safety, but I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE! But first, gimme a corpse

twitch chat

June 2021

[Copypasta] Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend

⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

Bender

I put my cursor over Kripp's and pretend we're holding hands

Classic

Hi Kripp, Suda the painting elephant here

Cypher

Valorant

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