twitchquotes:
Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
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(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
FORSEN BAJS
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Forsen
You are currently in a 25 year coma
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If you are reading this message, Jesse, you are currently in a 25 year coma. We've been trying to communicate with you for the longest time by manipulating your brain waves, but nothing so far has worked. If you manage to read this it means our new method has succeeded. Please, wake up Jesse. Your family loves you and wants you back. In a week they are going to pull the plug on your life support, they can't afford the medical bills anymore.
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Sneaky
Hello gentleman, I have suffered a loss of 69K
Hello gentleman, I regretfully wish to share with you all that I shant comment on this Internet forum henceforth. As of the time of my arrival in this past autumn, I have suffered a loss of 69K. By the blessing of Lady Luck, I am still experiencing a positive net balance of 420%, so I have come to the conclusion I must liquidate my insignificant phallus account. I shall use this fortune for procuring a vaginal enlargement and acquire tremendous breasts for my OnlyAristocracy parchment. Or I may be devilish and maintain an investment position in TournamentCease. I am short of hours of leisure in life, training dogs to consume peanut butter from the reaches of my posterior and can not bare the rapid change of value of my investment holdings of 40 point 7 grand. I am aware that you, my peers of this financial derivatives Internet forum are filled with ecstasy to become privy to this, so copulate with yourself, I desire you all to be ablaze in nonheteronormative ursine hell in tandem with Sadam.
WallStreetBets
Only have pudding for lunch...
twitchquotes:
̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\ only have pudding for lunch, so I'm pudding myself in the ground ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\
̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\ only have pudding for lunch, so I'm pudding myself in the ground ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\
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imaqtpie
Arrested for Navy Seal copypasta
I've mentioned this a lot before, but one of my best friends from back home was arrested, jailed for three months, and sentenced to 2 years probation for sending someone the Navy Seal copypasta on Facebook. As of today, he is FINALLY legally allowed to be online again.