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[Copypasta]Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old"
twitchquotes:Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
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Yeah I'm a virgin, so what?
Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
Putin should start an OnlyFans to save the Russian economy
Think about it. The Russian economy is in shambles. All assets frozen, there's no money coming in. But if he just spread that hiney for some people who would like it then why not? With a couple butt spread pictures maybe a ruble can be worth more than a potato again. Here are some content ideas that I suggest:
Wanking Videos (pretty basic, these are the cheapest ones cuz his dick🍆 is like 1 cm🥜)
Body Worship Videos (kinda hot ngl 😳😌😰, all his dick sucking oligarchs oil his body and touch him in ways he never thought possible👉👌👋🤛)
Sanction Bukkake (a livestream where in a dick cums on his face every time he gets a sanction🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦💦💦💦💦)
Lukashenko Sex Tapes (these are pretty expensive, a collection of Vladdy Daddy and Lukashenskank cumming with every position in the Kamasutra💃🕺♋🏇🐕)
Nuke-In-Crack Challenge (the most expensive one! This is where he fills his hole with the invaluable Russian crude oil and tries to fit a Nuclear Warhead up his ass! ⛽☢️🍑🎆)
What u guys think?
Think about it. The Russian economy is in shambles. All assets frozen, there's no money coming in. But if he just spread that hiney for some people who would like it then why not? With a couple butt spread pictures maybe a ruble can be worth more than a potato again. Here are some content ideas that I suggest:
Wanking Videos (pretty basic, these are the cheapest ones cuz his dick🍆 is like 1 cm🥜)
Body Worship Videos (kinda hot ngl 😳😌😰, all his dick sucking oligarchs oil his body and touch him in ways he never thought possible👉👌👋🤛)
Sanction Bukkake (a livestream where in a dick cums on his face every time he gets a sanction🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦💦💦💦💦)
Lukashenko Sex Tapes (these are pretty expensive, a collection of Vladdy Daddy and Lukashenskank cumming with every position in the Kamasutra💃🕺♋🏇🐕)
Nuke-In-Crack Challenge (the most expensive one! This is where he fills his hole with the invaluable Russian crude oil and tries to fit a Nuclear Warhead up his ass! ⛽☢️🍑🎆)
What u guys think?
So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.”
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.”
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
Spongebob, you are my new sex toy. I’m so happy I finally came to terms with this little problem and am now ready to do what every good boy needs. I want to be Sigmabob Grindpants.
I want to rub my erect penis against your tiny head until you’re drenched with my cum, and I want your tight little body to be the only place I’ll cum. I want to use you and abuse you, and then use you some more.
Your life belongs to me now.
You will not leave me again.
I want to feel you suck me, your wet, warm tongue sliding all over my shaft. I want to hold you down, tie you to a chair with your legs spread, and fuck you harder and faster than I’ve ever fucked my own mother. I want to watch you squirm as I push you into your own little corner of hell.
If you are willing, I will give you the cock of your dreams.
If you are not, you’ll watch as I cut you and play with your cum like it’s my very own porno.
You will never feel comfortable in your own skin again.
You will live, breathe, and die with me.
I own you, Spongebob!
I own you. I own you.
I own you.