[Copypasta] I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory

twitchquotes: I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory trying to provide pasta to hard-working people all across the world. After a long day of work, I come to Kripp's chat to unwind and have thought-driven discussions about my favorite game and favorite streamer. When I get here, however, all I see is pasta after pasta. All I want to do is escape my miserable life, but you fucks keep spamming.
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

HOTLINE MING

twitchquotes: MingLee I MingLee KNOW MingLee WHEN MingLee THAT MingLee HOTLINE MingLee MING MingLee THAT MingLee CAN MingLee ONLY MingLee MING MingLee ONE MingLee LEE MingLee YOU MingLee USED MingLee TO MingLee MingLee CALL MingLee ME MingLee ON MingLee MY MingLee CELLPHONE MingLee
twitch chat
November 2015

Classic

Singlee and ready to Minglee

twitchquotes: MingLee SINGLEE MingLee AND MingLee READY MingLee TO MingLee MINGLEE MingLee
twitch chat
November 2015

Classic

DrDisrespect shungite

Anyways, um... I bought a whole bunch of shungite rocks, do you know what shungite is? Anybody know what shungite is? No, not Suge Knight, I think he's locked up in prison. I'm talkin' shungite. Anyways, it's a two billion year-old like, rock stone that protects against frequencies and unwanted frequencies that may be traveling in the air. That's my story, I bought a whole bunch of stuff. Put 'em around the la casa. Little pyramids, stuff like that.
May 2020
DrDisRespectLIVE

Classic

Shungite

Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten

twitchquotes: Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10
twitch chat
October 2014

Classic

I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although America has 328.2 million people, I am not receiving 328.2 million votes on my election. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to vote for me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to vote for me. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing