twitchquotes:
TWITCH OUTDATED STREAM OVERRATED LONG HAVE WE WAITED ADVERTISING ACTIVATED
TWITCH OUTDATED STREAM OVERRATED LONG HAVE WE WAITED ADVERTISING ACTIVATED
twitch chat
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Kripp discovered one weird trick to look twice his age
twitchquotes:
Kripp is the remarkable twenty year old that discovered one weird trick to look twice his age. It's called being VEGAN and it limits your body’s nutritional intake and makes you look and feel TWICE AS OLD. Why would anyone want to be vegan you may ask, well all vegans hate animals so they eat all the animals food so that they starve to death.
twitch chat
Kripp
I used to work at an abortion clinic
I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed:
• A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight
• A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor
• They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name)
• One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns
• The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man
• The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life"
• The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos
• The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy)
• During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
NSFW
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes
twitchquotes:
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
twitch chat
Reynad
Fortnite default dance 10
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⣶⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣤⣉⣿⣿⣤⣀
⠤⣤⣿⣤⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀
⠀⠛⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠛⠿⣿⣤
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⣶⠿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⠀⣿⠿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠉⠉
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠉
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣛⣿⣭⣶⣀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠉⠛⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣉⠀⣶⠿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠿⠛
Fortnite Default Dance
Fortnite
I was born with glass bones and paper skin
twitchquotes:
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
twitch chat