twitchquotes:
In Twitch Chat they don't say "I love you", instead they say "OMEGALUL" which translates to "I watch you to not laugh with you, but at you" and I think that's really beautiful.
twitch chat
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RNGesus pounds Reynad's sweet, supple orifice relentlessly
twitchquotes:
Hello fair maiden Reynad, this is the valiant knight Sir Coppus Pastaronus. I have come to rescue you from the mystical Tower of Salt, where the cruel innkeeper RNGesus has pounded your sweet, supple orifice relentlessly to the beat of Lord 
Please no paste.
Please no paste.
twitch chat
Reynad
Hey Aura, thanks for telling me about Energizer batteries
twitchquotes:
Hey Aura, thanks for telling me about Energizer batteries. Before Energizer I would be listening to my walkman and the battery would die and then I could hear my wife in the other room having sex with you. That would lead me to tears. Now using Energizer the battery doesn't die as quickly and I can listen to your VODs that I ripped without your permission on repeat and not notice her taking it hard. I don't need to rehydrate as often since I won't be crying. Thank you
twitch chat
Aurateur
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
Classic
WallStreetBets
I pretended to be a girl in csgo
twitchquotes:
I pretended to be a girl in csgo competitive matchmaking. At first we just played csgo together, but we worked up to more. I even skyped dressed as a sexy woman "with poor connection" so the video would blur. After many seductive photos of my ass in my sisters underwear I convinced him I was the real deal. It took me 3 weeks to become his girlfriend. Eventually I scammed this guy out of $600 because I convinced him I would come visit if he paid for the flight. I was lucky it paid off because i had spent nearly $200 on make up to pull off this con. He also gifted me over 20 games on steam. 11/10 would do again. It was actually a nice weekend when I flew to visit him and didn't even mind sucking cock. We're looking to move in together in October.
twitch chat
CSGO
Clash Royale chicken emote
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