[Copypasta] Service dog approaches you

twitchquotes: If a service dog without a person approaches you, it means the person is down and in need of help. Follow the dog and you'll get a free purse or wallet.
twitch chat
April 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Team Rocket Prepare For Trouble

twitchquotes: Prepare for trouble! And make it double! To protect the world from devastation! To unite all peoples within our nation! To denounce the evils of truth and love! To extend our reach to the stars above! Jessie! James! Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light! Surrender now, or prepare to fight! Meowth! That's right!
twitch chat
August 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

Riding the chat elevator

twitchquotes: ( ͡↑ ͜ʖ ͡↑) Riding the chat elevator all the way to Kripp ( ͡↑ ͜ʖ ͡↑)
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

10 years since kolento strim

twitchquotes: 10 years since kolento strim.i walk through the empty streets trying to think of something else but my path always leads to the stream. i stare at the screen for hours and try to summon the lord. i watch other asian girls streaming but it is no good. i flame trump in his channel and try to resist the nazi mods but it is all meaningless. the end is near.i then usually watch some old kolento vods and cry myself to sleep.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kolento

Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass

I currently have a Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass. I am male if it matters. I've always been into putting things in my ass I don't know why, I'm not gay or anything I just like how it feels. Well I got drunk last night and decided to play with my ass and I hadn't gone shopping so I was out of carrots and cucumbers so I looked around and I saw my Buzz Lightyear action figure and thought "why not?" I've put action figures up there before because they feel different and it's funny. I grabbed Buzz, lubed him up and put him up against my asshole and started sliding him in. "To infinity and beyond!" I moaned as Buzz entered me. The only problem is that he has those wings that expand and so they popped open nearly splitting me in half and now he's stuck in there and I can't get him out. I know I need to go to the emergency room but honestly I'm scared and ashamed. I've managed to hide it from my wife so far but I think she's getting suspicious and can tell something is wrong. I'm going to try to sneak to the ER later and hopefully get it taken care of without her finding out.
July 2022

Confessions

All I want to do is spam xqcL

twitchquotes: Guys, I'm very sad. All I want to do is spam xqcL and spread happiness to the world of Twitch, but I can't do that if I don't have a xQc subscription. If anyone here would look deep in to their heart and ask themselves "can I do my part and help others join the jungle? Yes! Yes I can! I will gift this poor soul a subbie so they can spread love like everyone else widepeepoHappy ". Please take heed to what I have spoken and consider helping a friend out. xqcL
twitch chat
September 2019
xQcOW
Text-to-Speech Playing