[Copypasta] I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to

twitchquotes: I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to. Your life is fucking empty, which is why you're relishing this little bit of attention you're getting from someone. You spent an evening tweeting inane opinions and reactions into the void. Let me know when reality kicks in.
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla

December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume. "Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows. We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Confused DrDisrespect

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⣉⣀⣀⣈⠉⠻⠿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠛⠁⣠⣤⣤⣤⣄⠈⠋⠁⠠⣾⡿⠛⠛⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣴⣶⣦⣤⡀⠙⢿ ⠃⢰⣿⠿⠛⠛⢿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⡿⠁⠄⠂⠂⠄⠘⠉⠙⠻⣿⣦⠈ ⣦⣤⣀⣀⠈⢠⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⣠⣴⣾⣿⠏⢠ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣈⠛⠋⠉⠄⢠⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢰⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⡈⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠦⡘⠿⠿⣿⡿⣧⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⢀⡌⠁⠄⠄⠄⣹⠟⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣷⣦⡤⣾⣿⣷⢄⣀⣀⣠⣶⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⢿⠿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣯⣉⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣆⣼⣿⠲⠲⠶⢦⣄⡀⠻⡏⠄⠄⠰⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠻⢝⠿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠟⢃⡄⠁⠄⠄⠸⣾⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠟⠛⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠁⠚⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠒⠿⣿⣿⣿
May 2020
DrDisRespectLIVE

why are you gay

"why are you gay" i dont know.. one day i woke up and saw a mans ass, then i bit my lip and then he turned around and bit his lip too. then we fucked all night and forgot to say no homo, but he was fine with it. since then we've been fucking everyday, he's really vocal in bed and i love having fun with him 😏😏😏 so thats why im gay. im pretty sure his name is [ur dads name here] he's really good in bed.
May 2022

We can't blame market

To be fair "but I poop from there" wasn't an explicit "no". We can't blame market for doing what it did.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

I(21M) am convinced that my(20F) wife's pet rabbit thinks my wife is his mate, it is ruining our marriage

It all started when I was dating my wife. I met her four years ago and we have been dating all 4 years. She has had the rabbit since before I met her. The little bastard is old and saggy and partially blind. Some parts of his body is missing patches of fur because he pulls it out to make a nest for himself and my wife. When we met the rabbit was not a major issue. It would scratch and bite at me but my wife assured me he was just nervous to have another person in her apartment as my wife and the rabbit lived alone since my wife was 18. We have been married one year now and the rabbit is wreaking havoc on our marriage but my wife refuses to do anything because to her the rabbit is her baby and she loves it more than anything. When I first moved in the rabbit did not do much to me or us other than the previously mentioned bites and scratches but he shows my wife too much affection for just a owner. We will be doing anything and she will have the rabbit with her on top of her chest on her breasts licking them and her face. She will not put it down at all whenever she is home with it. We eat dinner, he is there, she goes to the bathroom, he comes with, she is showering? He waits outside for her, watching her nude in the shower. Wife does not even let me in the bathroom with her. It has gone to the point where whenever I show my wife affection the rabbit seeks revenge on me. Sometimes not immediately but at times he does attack me on the spot when I kiss my wife. Sometimes I find little tiny brown balls, his shit in my closet. Another thing is that she lets the little shit roam free all day but nighttime and when we are making love. This was not previously the case but after an accident during lovemaking and much long conversations I convinced my wife to put the rabbit in its cage when we are making love. But now whenever I am making love to my wife, like clockwork, the little shit knows what we are doing and screams at the top of its lungs until my wife abandons what she is doing, even nude and comes to the smug little shits rescue. He is doing this out of pure spite. I am aware that rabbits only scream when very stressed or in danger but he is in his huge cage because my wife spoils him only during night and when we make love, I swear he is doing this to ruin our marriage. He thinks my wife is his mate and wants to get rid of me. I have scars all over my body from bites and scratches and my life refuses to do anything about the rabbit or how much time she spends with it. We are in couples therapy and our marriage is very rocky. What do I do?
May 2022
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