[Copypasta] My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019
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January 2015

League of Legends

I love the McChicken

For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige. One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!". Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs. I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant.
April 2022

Domo Kun

─────────▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄───────── ───────▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄─────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„ β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–„β–€β–’β– β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β– β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€ β”€β”€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–„β–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β–β–’β–’β–β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–Œβ–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–β–„β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–„β–€β–€β–„β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ───────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀────▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀───────
September 2021

James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

SMOrc me chat SMOrc goats bad

twitchquotes: SMOrc me chat SMOrc goats bad SMOrc c9 SMOrc gift pass
twitch chat
March 2019
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Overwatch

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