[Copypasta] My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyoneโ€™s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Chinese characters wave

twitchquotes: ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠไธŽๆœฌไบŒไธŠๆ—ฆไธŠไบŒๆœฌไธŽๅŠๅ‰ไธ€ๅๅปฟๅžๅนฟไธ‹ๅŽ‚ๅŽ‚ไธ‹ๅนฟๅžๅปฟๅไธ€ๅ‰ๅŠ
twitch chat
May 2020

48 year man from Somalia, sorry for bad England

twitchquotes: ๏ปฟ๏ผจ๏ผฅ๏ผฌ๏ผฌ๏ผฏ ๏ผก๏ผญ ๏ผ”๏ผ˜ ๏ผน๏ผฅ๏ผก๏ผฒ ๏ผญ๏ผก๏ผฎ ๏ผฆ๏ผฒ๏ผฏ๏ผญ ๏ผณ๏ผฏ๏ผญ๏ผก๏ผฌ๏ผฉ๏ผก๏ผŽ ๏ผณ๏ผฏ๏ผฒ๏ผฒ๏ผน ๏ผฆ๏ผฏ๏ผฒ ๏ผข๏ผก๏ผค ๏ผฅ๏ผฎ๏ผง๏ผฌ๏ผก๏ผฎ๏ผค๏ผŽ ๏ผฉ ๏ผณ๏ผฅ๏ผฌ๏ผฌ๏ผฅ๏ผค ๏ผญ๏ผน ๏ผท๏ผฉ๏ผฆ๏ผฅ ๏ผฆ๏ผฏ๏ผฒ ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ๏ผด๏ผฅ๏ผฒ๏ผฎ๏ผฅ๏ผด ๏ผฃ๏ผฏ๏ผฎ๏ผฎ๏ผฅ๏ผฃ๏ผด๏ผฉ๏ผฏ๏ผฎ ๏ผฆ๏ผฏ๏ผฒ ๏ผฐ๏ผฌ๏ผก๏ผน ๏ผ‚๏ฝˆ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ผ‚ ๏ผก๏ผฎ๏ผค ๏ผฉ ๏ผท๏ผก๏ผฎ๏ผด ๏ผด๏ผฏ ๏ผข๏ผฅ๏ผฃ๏ผฏ๏ผญ๏ผฅ ๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฅ ๏ผง๏ผฏ๏ผฏ๏ผค๏ผฅ๏ผณ๏ผด ๏ผฐ๏ผฌ๏ผก๏ผน๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผฌ๏ผฉ๏ผซ๏ผฅ ๏ผน๏ผฏ๏ผต ๏ผฉ ๏ผฐ๏ผฌ๏ผก๏ผน ๏ผท๏ผฉ๏ผด๏ผจ ๏ผ”๏ผ๏ผ ๏ผฐ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ๏ผง ๏ผฏ๏ผฎ ๏ผข๏ผฒ๏ผก๏ผบ๏ผฉ๏ผฌ ๏ผณ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ๏ผถ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผก๏ผฎ๏ผค ๏ผฉ ๏ผก๏ผญ ๏ผฒ๏ผก๏ผฎ๏ผซ ๏ผ’๏ผ“ ๏ผก๏ผฌ๏ผฒ๏ผฅ๏ผก๏ผค๏ผน ๏ผฐ๏ผฌ๏ผณ ๏ผฎ๏ผฏ ๏ผฃ๏ผฏ๏ผฐ๏ผน ๏ผฐ๏ผก๏ผณ๏ผด๏ผฅ ๏ผญ๏ผน ๏ผณ๏ผด๏ผฏ๏ผฒ๏ผน
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Hearthstone

Domo Kun

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„ โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ– โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
ascii art
September 2021

MagicAmy should play as a spy in TF2

twitchquotes: (โ—•โ€ฟโ—•โœฟ) MagicAmy you should play as a spy in TF2 so you can justify being a shapeshifting backstabbing sociopath (โ—•โ€ฟโ—•โœฟ)
twitch chat
February 2015
magicamy

My daughter is dating a douche-bag (response to /r/cryptocurrency post)

My daughter is dating a douche-bag I don't know where I messed up, I thought I taught her well on what to look for in a man. The guy just showed up at my house and starting rambling on about how DCAing 30 dollars in 4 months into Safemoon helped him understand finance and geopolitics. I told him he was completely oblivious about being in a ponzi, this only unchained a what I believed to be a cocaine induced speech saying that Safemoon was going to be the next Bitcoin and he was going to moon while buying "lambos" for his friends because he was no "Bitch-ass paperhands". I'm a bank executive, so you can only imagine what a nightmare this is for me. Don't know what the point of this post is, is not like my daughter is going to stop dating that idiot anyways. I'm scared about my daughter's future.
September 2021

Cryptocurrency

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