[Copypasta] I have not been gifted a single sub

twitchquotes: Hey streamer, i just wanted to express my disappointment in your community with this message. I have been a active viewer for the past couple of years and despite my constant effort i have not been gifted a single sub by your community. You should really be ashamed.
twitch chat
July 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD

twitchquotes: Kripp, This is Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD. We need to question you about adjusting your Windows Clock to get ahead on opening Packs. If any of you copy and paste this, you will be subject to banning from Blizzard games forever. Come with me, Kripp
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

I love seeing TRUMP lose

twitchquotes: I love seeing TRUMP lose, it's my daily medicine, my weekly energy, my monthly inspiration and my yearly motivation. His loss is the only reason i'm still alive, i was born to love and enjoy the failure that he has achieved.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Man i love bull markets

Man i love bull markets. Tried to type in the ticker for MAXN yesterday to buy some but MAGN came up instead. Didn't know wtf it was but I was too lazy to redo my search so I bought that instead and it started mooning.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Nam or die

⣿⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⠛⣿⣿⠛⠛⠛⢻ ⣿⠄⠄⡀⠈⢿⠄⠄⣿⡟⠉⢉⣉⠉⠙⢿⣿⠄⢰⠄⠹⠇⠄⡆⠄⢸ ⣿⠄⠄⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⣿⡋⠉⠡⠶⠂⠄⢸⣿⠄⢸⣇⠄⠄⣼⡇⠄⢸ ⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣷⣶⣾⣿⣶⣾⣿⣶⣶⣿⣷⣶⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠰⣾⡆⠄⢈⣿⠄⠄⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠉⣉⡉⠉⠛⢿⣿⠉⠉⢹⣿⠉⠉⢉⣉⣉⣉⣹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⡆⠄⢈⣿⠄⠄⢸⣿⠄⠄⢈⣉⣉⣉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠉⠉⣀⣀⣾⣿⠄⠄⢸⣿⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
January 2019

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing