[Copypasta] you will never be on my intellectual level

twitchquotes: listen until you guys have read fichte, kant, schelling, hegel, goethe, novalis and hamann in the original german, you will never be on my intellectual level, you are plebs who are addicted to reddit and think rick and morty is a deep show, your children will be dysgenic losers and mine will be serious winners and well-educated, they'll probably smack the glasses off your children for fun and then go read homer in the original greek.
twitch chat
August 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Reddit and Twitter changed their logos

twitchquotes: My entire life I’ve been a hardcore anti-minority white man who despised anyone who didn’t look like me, but today I saw reddit and twitter changed their logos to the color black, and now I’m sitting here in shock just thinking about my choices in life. Wow.
twitch chat
June 2020

Among Us concerned father

Hello everyone, concerned father here. Recently my 7 year old son discovered the video game ā€œAmong Usā€ after playing it on his computer. While i didn’t mind at first, it soon began to affect his character. Within a week, he had been screaming 'sus’ in his sleep. When asked to do his homework, he called me a stupid father and said ā€˜kicked’. His grades have been dropping heavily since that day and whenever i refuse to give him my credit card for cosmetics he threatens me saying he’ll ā€œejectā€ me. Yesterday I entered his room to witness him listening to extremely loud rave 'Among Drip’, he put a bunch of pillows in his shirt to make himself look big and now calls himself a ā€œcrewmateā€. He refuses to go to bible study unless we use ā€œventā€ to get there. I don’t know what that is but he refuses to take any form of transportation except that. Please I am so concerned, what do I do?
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022

Stonks only go up. But you don't.

You watch her as she brushes her hair. She’s humming a song you can’t quite hear and smiling to herself. Not for the first time, you wonder why this person chose you. She turns. ā€œWhat do you want for Christmas?ā€ You want to scream Save your money!, but you only shrug. ā€œNothing, really.ā€ ā€œNothing?ā€ She crawls into bed and touches your leg. ā€œAre you sure?ā€ Again, you wonder why this person chose you. As she takes the weight of you in her hand, your mind wanders. To your puts. They’ll expire worthless, like you. After several minutes of failing to conjure your manhood, she asks, ā€œWhat’s wrong?ā€ Stonks only go up. But you don’t.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

THIS IS A TEST, IF YOU ARE HUMAN, DO NOT COPY PASTA

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid THIS IS A TEST, IF YOU ARE HUMAN, DO NOT COPY PASTA THIS MESSAGE MrDestructoid
twitch chat
August 2017

Viewbots

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