[Copypasta] Masculinity is now illegal

As of this morning πŸŒ„, masculinity πŸ’ͺπŸ†πŸ‘€ is NO 🚫❌ LONGER πŸ“ LEGAL πŸŒβš–. If you πŸ‘ˆ are masculine πŸ‘΄, please πŸ™πŸ™‡β€β™‚οΈ report πŸ“„ to your πŸ‘ˆπŸΌ nearest πŸ’ž Femboy πŸ‘—πŸ’β€β™‚οΈ Education πŸŽ“ Center 🏒✈, clean-shaven and wearing πŸ‘•πŸ‘–πŸ‘ž thigh-high socks 🧦. Those who fail 🚫 to follow πŸ‘£ these orders πŸ“‘πŸŽ WILL BE CANCELLED ❌🚷😑.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Annoying Lit mobile YouTube ad

twitchquotes: So lit mobile just sent me this solar wireless battery pack, I'm excited, lets see whats inside. I really like the build its got really nice grips on the side, its shock proof, and water resistant. The power bank has 20,000 milliamps which can fully charge your phone up to eight times. Its also got a convenient loop for carrying. on the back of the device we have a bunch of solar panels which can charge the battery bank in about 60 minutes. On the top of the device, there are 3 usb ports and 2 of them are fast charging. If you hit the power button 2 times, the led light comes on. If you hit the power button once, the led lights will tell you how much battery you have. There's a micro usb port on the side for fast charging. My favorite part of this device is that it charges my phone wirelessly. there's a red light indicator at the top to let you know that your phone is charging.
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May 2020

Horny during Space Jam 2

OK so I was watching space jam 2 and I got RANDOMLY horny. I didn’t wanna exit the movie so I just waited till the Lola scene came up. It came. I started JACKING the SHIT out my pecker. And then.. I ACCIDENTLY NUTTED TO LEBRON😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
July 2021

I have done it, 80 years and not a single nut bust

twitchquotes: I have done it, 80 years and not a single nut bust. Thanks to my incredible goal i have obtained an iq of 156 which i have used to build a pc that deletes system 32 when it loads any type of NSFW. I’m currently in a hospital bed dying of terminal disease, however, this is a victory as in 72 hours i’m expected to die. Wish me luck in this final run.
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November 2020

RIP Kattarian

twitchquotes: 2003-2014 R I P Kattarian, you will be missed. I know Kripp would do unspeakable sexual things to you off stream and he killed you in a salt rage after getting top decked and then tells us that you are "temporarily gone" but just know this, chat loved you and we know you're in a better place safe from Kripp's evil
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January 2015
Kripp

Hey man, it's Mark from History 101

twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing