I don’t care if there’s a microchip in the vaccine. I’d let them put a whole MacBook Pro inside of me if it meant I could get drunk at Applebees again
I used to be a real ad
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Solar energy stocks at night time
It’s nighttime so of course solar energy stocks would be weak as fuck. Wait til morning when the sun rises & pumps them
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I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do
I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do or even what the ticker stands for...but you better believe I’m jacked to the mf’ing tits in every single meme stonk that you crayon eaters have been pumping. CHOO CHOO MF’ER.
WallStreetBets
Kelly Loeffler after Georgia senate election
Kelly Loeffler I know you're at home right now feeling a little sad. And now you're in bed browsing WSB looking for hot stock tips with maybe a few laughs. But just know this: I will have sex with you. DM me.
WallStreetBets
It's called empathy
Sometimes watching porn I like to pretend I'm the "woman" it's called empathy not homosexuality.
WallStreetBets
How traders politely decline the second date
I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.