[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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DJ

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Pepega

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Pepe

乇乂ㄒ尺卂 丂山口乚口

twitchquotes: In japan we don't say 'I love Star Wars' we say 乇乂ㄒ尺卂 丂山口乚口 which doesn't mean anything it just spells out 'I wanna fuck Ben Swolo' in japanese symbols.
twitch chat
January 2018

Cloud 9 / C9 logo

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⠋⠉⠹⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣄⡀⣰⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣄⡙⢿⡿⣱⣿⣿⠋⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⢣⣾⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣄⠄⢀⣴⣮⣝⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⣭⣛⠄⠄⠄⣽⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⡿⠛⠿⢸⡇⢀⡾⠛⣿⣾⣿⠀⣿⢸⡏⠻⣦⢰⡟⢻⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⠶⠟⠸⠷⠆⠻⠶⠿⠛⠿⠶⠿⠸⠷⠾⠏⠘⢷⣾⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠾⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
July 2021

DONGERS initiative

twitchquotes: (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Hello Kripparrian, this is Agent Saltson, from the Secret Hearthstone Information Education and Luck Division. I need to talk to you about the D.O.N.G.E.R.S Initiative. (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp
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