[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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Hydra

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March 2020

I just smashed my TV because of the SPY

I just smashed my TV in front of 30 guests at my house because of the SPY. My wife just took our crying kids and said they’re all spending the week at a hotel. This sub has ruined my life and my party. I can’t handle this anymore. Goodbye Powell. I am no longer a fan.
March 2022

WallStreetBets

God of War Kratos

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September 2021

Here πŸ’¦ CUMS πŸ’¦ SANTA (Christmas Emoji Pasta)

Here πŸ’¦CUMSπŸ’¦ πŸŽ…πŸ½Santa Claus,πŸŽ…πŸ½ here πŸ’¦CUMSπŸ’¦ πŸŽ…πŸ½Santa Claus,πŸŽ…πŸ½ right down πŸ‘©πŸ½πŸ‘ΈπŸ½slutty girl lane!πŸ‘©πŸ½πŸ‘ΈπŸ½ ❌🚫❌🚫STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!❌🚫❌🚫 Is your πŸ‘¨πŸ»πŸ‘¨πŸ»daddyπŸ‘¨πŸ»πŸ‘¨πŸ» not giving you enough πŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦cummies?!πŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦ Hold up,πŸ™…πŸ½πŸ™…πŸ½πŸ™…πŸ½ ho! It's πŸ’¦πŸ’¦cummyπŸ’¦πŸ’¦ β„οΈπŸ’¦β„οΈSEASON!β„οΈπŸ’¦β„οΈ Pushβœ‹πŸ½βœ‹πŸ½ that πŸ‘¨πŸ»πŸ‘¨πŸ»daddyπŸ‘¨πŸ»πŸ‘¨πŸ» to the ⏩⏩side⏩⏩ and let a πŸ‘ŒπŸ½NEWπŸ‘ŒπŸ½ father in 🏑YOUR CHIMNEY!! 🏑 πŸŽ…πŸ½πŸŽ…πŸ½πŸŽ…πŸ½Father CHRISTMAS,πŸŽ…πŸ½πŸŽ…πŸ½πŸŽ…πŸ½ the πŸ‘‘πŸ‘‘KINGπŸ‘‘πŸ‘‘ of πŸ’¦cummies!πŸ’¦ That's right,πŸ‘πŸΌ he's been making πŸ‘§πŸ½littleπŸ‘§πŸ½ πŸ‘§πŸ½girlsπŸ‘§πŸ½ squishy for 6️⃣ CENTURIES. Don't ❎❎ mind the old saying; he ONLY makes the πŸ’¦πŸ˜«πŸ˜«πŸ˜ˆNAUGHTIESTπŸ˜ˆπŸ˜«πŸ˜«πŸ’¦girls ☁️squishy☁️! So send this to all the 😼nastiest😼 πŸ‘§πŸ½girlsπŸ‘§πŸ½ you know and share❗️Those❗️Cummies❗️Get 0️⃣ back and you're a basic πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘coal-slinging bitch.πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ Get 5️⃣ back and you get πŸ‘…eatenπŸ‘… like πŸͺcookiesπŸͺand πŸ‘…πŸ’¦slurpedπŸ’¦πŸ‘… like 🍼milk!🍼 Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back and πŸŽ…πŸ½Santa'sπŸŽ…πŸ½ big πŸ†πŸ†COCKπŸ†πŸ† will grow⏫⏫ 3️⃣ sizes inside of you!😫😩 Get 1️⃣5️⃣ back and you become Mrs. Claus, and get πŸ‘πŸŒπŸ†yummy πŸ’πŸ­πŸΌnummy πŸΌπŸ’¦β˜οΈsquishyπŸΌπŸ’¦β˜οΈ πŸ’§πŸ’§cummiesπŸ’§πŸ’§ until next β©πŸŒ¨β˜ƒChristmas!πŸŒ¨β˜ƒ
December 2021

Emoji Pasta

Christmas

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

copy: pastad

gamer head: on knuckles: cracked gaming goggles: on arms: stretched gamer girl pee: drinked girlfriend: none gay best friend: invited wife: beaten wife: cheated on daughter: abandoned child: destroyed your mom: fucked rockets: launched funding: secured anime: loved Japan: nuked HIV: positive blood: donated American genocide: denied milf: hunted milfs: lewded babies: yeeted emerald splash: deflated society: segregated Israel: destroyed heroin: shot milk: consumed mother: donuted father: robbed identity: hidden traitor: kakyoined Italian drug trade: monopolized masters: awaken Caeser: killed left wing: destroyed lib: owned hog: cranked pants: shid bottom: text top: text Hotel: Trivago Hotel: Mario Duke: Nukem cer: armic balls: crushed balls: ligma the imposter: sus sussy: balls Gucci: gang Delivery: Digiorno Peterbilt: gassed Half: life pog: gers Vaporeon: cool :) edit: spelling
August 2021
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