[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Stock space rocket

.           ✦             ˚              *                       .              .            ✦              ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍                  ,       .             .   ゚      .             .       ,       .                                  ☀️                                                        .           .             .                                                                                        ✦       ,          [stock ticker]🚀        ,    ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍               .            .                                             ˚            ,                                       .                      .             .               *            ✦                                               .                  .           .        .     🌑              .           .              ˚                     ゚     .               .      🌎 ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ,                * .                    .           ✦             ˚              *                        .
January 2021

WallStreetBets

TSM, also known as "Tossed Six Million"

twitchquotes: TSM, also known as "Tossed Six Million" is a North American investment firm often known for their innovative investment strategy of burning up money and failing to return any meaningful results.
twitch chat
February 2021

League of Legends

PauseChamp

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠂⠀ ⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠿⠟⠉⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⢉⣼⣿⣿⣿⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⣩⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠛⠛⢋⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣁⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣈⡻⠋⠁⠀⠀ ⣰⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠩⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⡶⠶⠶⢶⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣻⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠈⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠄⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

PagChomp

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣯⣥⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠻⠿⠟⠉⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣡⣼⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣟⣭⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⡀⢀⣩⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⡛⠛⠛⠛⢋⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⠛⠛⠓⠠⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣦⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣄⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣜⡻⠋⠀⠀⠀ ⣰⣾⣷⣶⣿⣾⣖⣻⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⢉⡽⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡤⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠛⢶⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⠲⣴⣦⣤⣤⣤⣶⡾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠄⠈⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C .... I came to warn you about the extinction of Herbivores and the 'never lucky' curse it bestows on us. Kripp, you must eat meat immediately! If you don't, a giant "MEAT-EOR" will crash into earth and extinct us all... again... Us Herbivores were wrong. WE WERE WRONG! WutFace
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

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