the year is 2021
A tesla drives down the street
unknowing of the danger behind it
a beast of American metal and lightning
The driver realizes he is in danger in his commie-fornia shoebox
He presses the pussy pedal as hard as he can
It cannot save him, he can hear the music already
"THIS IS GAWWWWWD'S COUNTRRRRRYYYYYYY"
He realizes he is already dead
In an instant he becomes like a fly in the grill of a truck
In the grill of the Ford F-150 EV
It stops for no one
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Team Bull vs Team Bear
Team Bull
Jerome "We print it digitally" Powell
Elon "TSLA stonk too low imo" Musk
Nancy "Stimulus talks going well" Pelosi
Donny "Stop the count" Mango
Janet "Unlimited QE bitch" Yellen
Lisa "Su Bae" Su
Ryan "Make Gamestop great again" Cohen
------------------------------------------------------------------------
VS
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Team Bear
Jeff "No stock split to keep the poors out" Bezos
Mitch "Stimulus talks not going well" Mcconnell
Steven "Discontinue the PPP" Mnuchin
Andrew "PlTr PrIcE tArGeT $10" Left
Tim "Don't call me by my slave name" Apple
Michael "I'm publicly shorting TSLA" Burry
Warren "I fought in the Civil War" Buffet
Which team will win?
Team Bull or Team Bear?
Load up on weeklies for a ticket to the pay per view hell in the cell match.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Special Guests:
That one JPM analyst with TSLA 90p 12/18
Life savings SPCE calls guy
Jim "FUCK ROBINHOOD" Cramer
WallStreetBets
If PLTR hits 35 today
If PLTR hits 35 today I will wipe with quarter ply toilet paper and accidentally discover myself
WallStreetBets
GME to the moon
.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦ γγγγββ γ γγγΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγβ
βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ. γγβγγγγγγγ β¦
γγγγγγγγγγ γ β β β β γγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγ,γγβββγ
.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγοΎγββγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγβοΈif we holdγγ.
,γγγγγγγ.γγγγγγββββγγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβ
γγγγγγγγγγ. γγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββ β¦
γβββγγγ,γγγγγγγγγγγββββπ gme γγγγ γγ,γγγ β β β β γ
γγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγβγγ
γγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγβγβββββββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγΛγ
ββγγγγ,γγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγ
βγγββββγγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*
γγ ββγγγγγ β¦ γγγγγγγβββββββββγββββββββγγγγ
γγβγγγγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγββββγγ.
γβγγγγγ.γγγγ π γγγγγβββγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγ.γ
ΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγοΎγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγβγ π β β if we sell β β β β β β β ,γ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*
.γγγγγβγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦
Λγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγβ
βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
WallStreetBets
Classic
Wallstreetbet's Christmas break
Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
WallStreetBets
$600 should last us for at least 5 months
Our government is so kind and caring for us. Waits till the very last minute to finally pass something and gives us $600 which should last us for at least 5 months. God bless this country