Ok, if you didn’t know this I should probably tell you. I am uncircumcised, and with me still having my foreskin it feels better to yank my hog. So I have a little routine of jacking off everyday around 11 pm at night. It was around 9:45 pm when I was feeling a little Horny. I was on Nikocado Avocado’s OnlyFans and I must say, it got the better of me. So I just started tugging my meat sword before my usual routine. There’s nothing wrong with that, a premature coom session, it’s all good. So I was jelking my prize hog when all of a we sudden I noticed that my door was still open. I knew that since I started masturbaiting earlier then usual that my family would still be awake. So I get up from my bed and walk to my door still jerking off and I get to my door. I’m just about to close the door when all of a sudden my prankster of a step sister slams my bedroom door shut. And that’s when a sudden sharp pain hits me and I look down and see that my foreskin has gotten caught in the door as it slammed. Holy shit it fucking hurt, my fucking d**k felt like it was gonna fall off. Then when I think shit can’t get worse. My step sister started banging on my door demanding that she come inside my room. The banging was making it worse. I shouted “GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!” but she didn’t listen. She kept banging on the door and that’s when my pain grew into pleasure. It was basically like my foreskin was being rubbed by the doors banging. “Oh shit, that feels really good” I thought. It was like I was fucking my door, it was the best feeling of my life. I wanted to scream and moan In pleasure, but my sister was on the other end of the door. Then right when I was about to bust my sister said “ Fine, I’m just gonna come in anyway”. She opened the door, but It was too late. I busted a fat nut all over her face. She started screaming and she ran away to the bathroom. God, I felt so embarrassed. Despite that, fucking that door was amazing. 10/10 would recommend.
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Kripp, this is an intervention
twitchquotes:
Kripp, this is an intervention. We are very worried about you. Ever since you started playing Hearthstone, you have been becoming more and more casual. We care about you very much, but we can't just sit back and watch you torture yourself. Perhaps religion may help, have you heard of your lord and savior, RNGesus?
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Kripp
Leper gnome into the Twisted Nether
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"Yᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ɪs ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ.” Fᴏʀsᴇɴ sᴀɪᴅ, ᴀs ʜᴇ sʟɪᴘᴘᴇᴅ ʜɪs ғᴇᴍɪɴɪɴᴇ ʜᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ Tʀᴜᴍᴘs’s ᴘᴀɴᴛs ᴀɴᴅ sᴍɪʀᴋᴇᴅ. “Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴏᴘ-ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ᴍᴇ?” ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇsᴛs Tʀᴜᴍᴘ, ᴀs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ʙʟᴜsʜᴇs, ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏʏɪsʜ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴜɴᴅʀᴇssᴇᴅ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ. “Wᴇᴀᴋ ᴛᴇᴍᴘᴏ ᴘʟᴀʏ, Fᴏʀsᴇɴ.” Tʜᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴋɪssᴇᴅ, ᴅᴇᴇᴘʟʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀssɪᴏɴᴀᴛᴇʟʏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴀғᴛᴇʀᴡᴀʀᴅs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇs ʜɪs ʟᴇᴘᴇʀ ɢɴᴏᴍᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʀᴜᴍᴘs's ᴛᴡɪsᴛᴇᴅ ɴᴇᴛʜᴇʀ
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Forsen
Arrogant globaphopic
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This offends me as a vegan transgender atheist who vapes and crossfits 4 times a week and im also a male feminist as I identify myself as a pastafarian apache helicopter dog mega multi combo god of hyper death and if you dont agree with me. You're an ignorant arrogant globaphobic sexist lesbian
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An automated message from Blizzard Entertainment to Athene
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Greetings, AtheneLIVE! This is an automated message from Blizzard™ Entertainment. You are receiving this message because our Hearthstone™ AI has flagged your account due to an unusual number of ranked game losses. We recommend that you use the "Suggested Card" feature before progressing any further. Thanks - The Blizzard™ Team.
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AtheneLIVE
Navy Seals Copypasta in military alphabet
Whiskey hotel alpha tango tango hotel echo foxtrot uniform charlie kilo delta india delta yankee oscar uniform juliett uniform sierra tango foxtrot uniform charlie kilo india november golf sierra alpha yankee alpha bravo oscar uniform tango mike echo , yankee oscar uniform lima india tango tango lima echo bravo india tango charlie hotel ? i' lima lima hotel alpha victor echo yankee oscar uniform kilo november oscar whiskey i golf romeo alpha delta uniform alpha tango echo delta tango oscar papa oscar foxtrot mike yankee charlie lima alpha sierra sierra india november tango hotel echo n alpha victor yankee s echo alpha lima sierra , alpha november delta i' victor echo bravo echo echo november india november victor oscar lima victor echo delta india november november uniform mike echo romeo oscar uniform sierra sierra echo charlie romeo echo tango romeo alpha india delta sierra oscar november a lima dash q uniform alpha echo delta alpha , alpha november delta i hotel alpha victor echo oscar victor echo romeo three zero zero charlie oscar november foxtrot india romeo mike echo delta kilo india lima lima sierra. 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