[Copypasta] Sneed's Feed & Seed

The joke is that the place is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed" which is clever in itself and quite funny to those with a mature sense of humour but what's really just hilarious about it is that if you look closely at the front of this store, Sneed's Feed & Seed, you can see a line that reads "Formerly Chuck's". Now, this might go over the average viewer's head as this, THIS, is peak comedy. I doubt anything will ever be as funny as the joke about Sneed's Feed & Seed. Are you ready for this one? So, like I said, the place is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed" and this sign says "Formerly Chuck's", which means that when Chuck owned the place, well, I don't have to tell you...
January 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Hydra cock

April 2021

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Mr Bear song (that's where your hopes go to die)

Well There's all sorts of creatures, down on Dangley Doodle Farm. Like wise old Mr Octopus, with way too many arms! There's Mr Pig! And Mr Cow! They're always in good moods. But That's cause they don't know they'll soon be sliced up into food! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your hopes go to turn into despair. Mr Bear! What's That over there? That's where your dreams go to die! Mr Racoon! Wants to go to the moon. He'll end up as a bus driver soon! Mr Porcupine! Thinks he'll read the news at nine, he'll end up as a janitor, who stinks of turpentine. Mr Tiny Mouse! Thought he'd own a massive house. Ended up in a bed sit where he can't control the louse! Mr Horse! Though he'd go into professional sports. Now he's an alcoholic and he's on his third divorce! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the place your life becomes an endless questionnaire! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your hopes go to die. Lower your expectations! Maybe you could get a job in telecommunications. No matter how you try you'll never reach the League of Nations. The best you'll get is middle rank in trading operations! So lower your expectations! You'll never win an oscar, so there's no congratulations. The future that is coming will not meet specifications. And no amount of visualisations will save you from your own deterioration Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the tramp who thought he'd be a multimillionaire! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where self-esteem goes to die. Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the disappointment that is waiting everywhere! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your schemes go to die! That's where your dreams go to die! That's where dreams go to die!
April 2022

KFC

โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโขŸโฃ‹โฃญโฃฅโฃญโฃญโฃโก‰โ ‰โ ™โ ›โ ปโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกโ โ  โ ถโ ›โ ปโ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโก„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‰โ ปโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ Ÿโ „โข€โกดโขŠโฃดโฃถโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโขฟโก„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ™โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ โ „โ ™โกŸโ โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃŽโ ƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˆโขปโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโกŸโ „โ „โ „โ „โก‡โ ฐโ Ÿโ ›โ ›โ ฟโ ฟโ Ÿโข‹โข‰โ โขฉโฃ โก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขนโฃฟ โฃฟโ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ฐโ โฃ‘โฃฌโฃคโก€โฃพโฃฆโฃถโฃพโฃ–โฃผโฃฟโ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขฟ โกโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ จโฃฟโ Ÿโ ฐโ ปโ ฟโฃฃโก™โ ฟโฃฟโ ‹โ „โข€โก€โฃ€โ „โฃ€โฃ€โข€โฃ€โฃ€โขธ โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃ โ „โ šโ ›โ ‰โ ญโฃ‰โขโฃฟโ „โข€โกฟโขพโฃ…โขธโก—โ ‚โขฟโฃ€โก€โขธ โก‡โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ˜โขงโฃ„โ „โฃปโฃฟโฃฟโฃพโ Ÿโฃ€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขธ โฃฟโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข โก€โ „โ „โฃฟโฃฟโ Ÿโขโฃดโฃฟโขธโก„โ „โขฆโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃ„โก€โฃผ โฃฟโฃงโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข โกธโฃฟโ ’โ „โ ˆโ ›โ „โ โขนโกŸโฃพโก‡โ „โ ˆโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃงโฃ โฃดโฃฆโ „โ „โขธโฃทโกนโฃงโฃ–โก”โ „โ ฑโฃฎโฃปโฃทโฃฟโฃฟโ „โ „โ ˜โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ „โ „โ ธโ ฟโ ฟโ šโ ›โ โ ‚โ „โ ‰โ ‰โก…โขฐโก†โขฐโก„โ „โ ˜โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃคโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฟโ „โฃทโ ˜โฃงโฃ โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃฆโฃคโฃ„โฃ€โฃ€โก€โ „โฃ€โฃ€โฃนโฃฆโฃฝโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ
November 2018

Iron Man

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
September 2021

How I got into Harvard

Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview. As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart. :)
December 2020

Rick and Morty

Text-to-Speech Playing