[Copypasta] You can't stop what's coming leafboy

You can't stop what's coming leafboy. I walk all over leaves every autumn, you think this year will be any different? Your flag is a fucking leaf. You chose the one part of the tree that dies every year. Not only that, but it's one of hundreds of leaves, thousands if it's a big tree. All dead come winter. Every winter. A vicious cycle. Totally insignificant. As soon as the tree has had it's way with you you are cast to the Earth to be trod by all other living things. Ants? They not only stomp about you, they will steal your corpse and use it for their people. Birds steal your lifeless shell with impunity. Leaves not only die once, but every year. A brave man dies only once, but leaves die a thousand deaths, or at least 20 or 30 if the tree lives that long. Perhaps more. Every year, leafs crunch beneath my boot. This year shall be no different. So it shall be written. So it shall be done. The day of the rake is at hand because every day is the day of the rake and has always been.
January 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022

CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste

twitchquotes: (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Hello Kripp i am CEO of Campbells Tomato Paste. This stream is now under my control i bought all rights to paste and pastarino products if anyone copy and pastes again i will sue you so dont copy and paste (▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Molediver Hypers

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠋⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⠃⣾⡇⢸⣿⠟⢡⡆⢸ ⡿⠿⡏⢸⣇⢹⣿⠟⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⡿⠋⢥⡀⠈⠻⢰⣿⡇⠸⠏⣴⣿⠄⣼ ⠄⡄⠁⢸⣿⡄⠏⠄⡆⠘⡄⠄⠄⠈⣭⣵⣿⡎⣅⣠⡤⠘⠟⣡⣶⣶⣍⠋⠄⡙ ⠄⣿⠄⢘⣋⣃⠄⢀⣿⠄⢃⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠟⠁⢹⣇⣀⣤⣤⣶⡤⠈⣿⡆⢠⡇ ⠄⡿⢰⣿⣿⣿⡧⢸⣿⡆⠞⣀⠄⣀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⡿⠿⠋⠉⢉⠠⣾⣿⣷⢸⢀ ⡀⠃⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⡇⢀⣨⣿⣿⡿⠟⢋⣉⡀⠰⣾⡄⠄⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿⠘⣼ ⣷⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣙⠿⠁⣿⠿⠋⡁⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣷⠈⠄⣀⣈⣁⣈⣉⠹⡀⣿ ⣿⡄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢰⣶⣿⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⠁⣿ ⣿⡇⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠸⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠻⠿⠋⣰⣧⠙⢿⣿⣿⠃⣸⢰⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⣠⣴⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡤⢀⣴⡿⢨⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⣠⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠁⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⠇⢸⣿
February 2021

Teamfight Tactics

Strong cringe feeling overflowing me

twitchquotes: Every time you reach out your hand to your webcam and lower your voice there is a strong cringe feeling overflowing me like a zoo lock overflows the board and there is no way I can handle it
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Please use the code Tempo to save 3% off...

twitchquotes: BibleThump Andrey Yanuk otherwise known as Reynad has passed away this Saturday's afternoon. He was ambushed by a group of dongers in an alley, and stabbed with a kniferino made out of a salt shaker. His last words were "please use the code "Tempo" to save 3% off the funeral costs and bury me in my tempostorm tshirt". Rest in peace pepperoni cappuccino pistachio bro. You shall be missed. Please no copy pasterino cappuccino
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

sellout

Text-to-Speech Playing