[Copypasta] good news, my sisters pregnant!

good news, my sisters pregnant! i'm going to be a .... uncle, you thought i was going to say Dad but i stopped banging my sister years ago
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Ahsoka Tano

twitchquotes: Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your fatherโ€™s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems. Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while weโ€™d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi โ€œtrainingโ€ of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics youโ€™d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as sheโ€™d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
twitch chat
November 2020

Kreygasm

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–„โ– โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ– โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–Œโ–’โ–โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Reynad keeps escaped walruses from the local zoo

twitchquotes: Wแด‡สŸสŸ แดแด‡แด› Rแด‡สษดแด€แด…! I แด€แด Dแด€ษด GแดœสŸ, แดแดกษดแด‡ส€ แดา“ แด›สœแด‡ สŸแดแด„แด€สŸ แดขแดแด. WสœษชสŸแด‡ แดกแด€แด›แด„สœษชษดษข สแดแดœส€ sแด›ส€แด‡แด€แด แดกแด‡ ษดแดแด›ษชแด„แด‡แด… sแดแดแด‡ แด…ษชsแด›แดœส€ส™ษชษดษข sแดแดœษดแด…s แด„แดแดษชษดษข า“ส€แดแด สแดแดœส€ แดษชแด„ แด›สœแด€แด› แดกแด‡ ส™แด‡สŸษชแด‡แด แด‡ แด›แด ส™แด‡ sแดแดแด‡ ส€แด‡แด„แด‡ษดแด›สŸส แด‡sแด„แด€แด˜แด‡แด… แดกแด€สŸส€แดœsแด‡s. Iา“ สแดแดœ แด…แด ษดแดแด› ส€แด‡แด›แดœส€ษด แดแดœส€ แดกแด€สŸส€แดœsแด‡s แดกษชแด›สœษชษด 24 สœแดแดœส€s, แดกแด‡ แดกษชสŸสŸ สœแด€แด แด‡ Tแดกษชแด›แด„สœ sสœแดœแด› แด…แดแดกษด สแดแดœส€ แด„สœแด€ษดษดแด‡สŸ. I'แด ส™แด€ษชแด›ษชษดษข สแดแดœ.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Don't ever smoke

twitchquotes: My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your stream gave me cancer anyway.
twitch chat
January 2020

Classic

Please refrain from spamming anymore

twitchquotes: Chat, you do realize that your spam does not help my stream experience. It actually ruins it. I know it is hard to take in, but please refrain from spamming anymore. Do not make me repeat myself. I'm warning you chat.
twitch chat
September 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

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